You’ll never win a Koufax or a Bloggy, but at Feministe, everyone quick and witty is a winner. The only change to this round of award-giving and award-taking is that you must have a blog and you must provide a corresponding picture of some sort, proving that you deserve the award. Screen captures count as a picture. Be creative.
Rules for the Feministe Anti-Awards:
- Write on your own blog why you think you should win the award of your choice. Include pictures! Be thorough, not greedy.
- First person to nominate him/herself for the award wins the award. No, really. Leave a comment here if you cannot trackback, or use the Trackback Pinger.
- More categories will be added if any latecomers want an award of their own; however, no additional categories will be added until all of these are taken.
- Copy the award picture to your blog, announcing your undeniable win.
And the categories are:
The “Hare Beats the Turtle” Award
The “Grammar Police and How!” Award Maureen proudly takes this one!
The “Most Selfish Blogger” Award Dance an Irish jig for Tas!
The “Obscenely Crooked Toe (Or Nose)” Award Shake a maraca for Mizz Kittie’s eleventh toe!
The “Most Creative Pet Name” Award I almost didn’t take this one because fish are involved, but Sid wins for her goldfish named Bacon, who died before she could take a picture. He did that to spite you, you know.
The “Most Belly Button Lint” Award I’m giving this one to Jeremy, even though he won’t let Emily, his proud girlfriend, take a picture.
The “My Mom Doesn’t Know About My Blog” Award Joel’s mom totally doesn’t know about his blog. Proof in Lynn’s sidebar moblog.
The “Burningbird Lost in the Woods” Award AAH takes this one, beating out Shelley at her own award!
The “I Should Be Ashamed of My Liquor Cabinet But I’m Not” Award Fred Vincy should be ashamed of his liquor cabinet for not stocking Mary’s bottle o’ gin!
The “Loveliest Office Supplies” Award Dr. B’s obsession is a bit out of hand. Cheerio!
The “Your Mother Wears Army Boots” Award A hearty cheer for Lubu!
The “Most Egregious Hate Mail” Award This one goes to Grace at Dr. Laura’s Worst Nightmare for examples one and two. Excellent examples of hate mail!
The “Eden’s Snake” Award Amanda poses as a snake in the garden of Eden, except that she is the one bathed in light. Snakes always get a bad wrap!
The “Sheep in Wolf’s Clothing” Award Lynn scrambles for a few awards, but takes this one for the little sheep wolf’s ears taped on, beside Jesus in the manger. That one is definitely a winner, not the sad picture of the liquor cabinet.
The “Land Mine” Award
and finally,
The “Academic Asshat” Award
Remember that pictures are necessary to win (whatever that means).
[...] t a Secret….
Filed under: Whimsies Site News — Joel @ 5:37 pm
I’m overdue for accepting the My Mother [...]
[...] t a Secret….
Filed under: Whimsies Site News — Joel @ 5:37 pm
I’m overdue for accepting the My Mother [...]
I’m taking it!
Well, here’s one award I can win: Feministe’s “Most Selfish Blogger” Award. And wh
I am nominating my daughter for the “Your Mother Wears Army Boots” award. I’ve got a pic up on my blog of her, in my work boots (Red Wing). The picture didn’t turn out quite the way I wanted it to on the blog, but it took me around an hour to figure out how the hell to get it up there to begin with. It’s the first picture I ever posted, and “cleaning it up” or making it more clear is far beyond my computing skills at this time. I don’t even really know how I got it up there!
Anyway, the picture was taken when she was three; she’s five now. This christmas, among her several presents was a real, live tool belt with real, live (downsized) tools from the Duluth Co. Now she can be an electrician right along with mama!
The Anti Awards Continue
Lauren continues the Anti Awards, with these new categories. he “Hare Beats the Turtle” Award The “Grammar Police and How!” Award The “Most Selfish Blogger” Award Dance an Irish jig for Tas! The “Obscenely Crooked Toe (Or Nose)” Award T…
I tried getting the trackback to work, but I must be doing something wrong because it’s, well, not working. So, instead, here’s a link to my nomination for the “Obscenely Crooked Toe” award:
“I Never Thought I’d Find A Use For It – Until Now“
What, no Best Ranting category? :( I would win that one for sure……
The “Grammer Police” Award
I, Maureen Craig, do hereby nominate myself for Feministe’s 2005 “Grammer Police” award on the basis of the following:
1. My status as a grammar god
2. My tendency to have footnotes regarding grammar and gender
My boyfriend, Jeremy, should be the hands-down winner of the “Most Belly Button Lint” Award, but he refuses to let me take a picture. Oh well!
C’mon Jeremy, let her take a picture!
Egregious Hate Mail – As the sender or recipient? If you’re looking for doozy hate mail, I was sent two and published both of these as follows:
http://gracedavis.typepad.com/i_am_dr_lauras_worst_nigh/2004/12/i_have_arrived_.html
…and this one, which included nasty stank about my kid:
http://gracedavis.typepad.com/i_am_dr_lauras_worst_nigh/2004/12/hate_mail_2_chr.html
I’m crossing my fingers. And adding you to my links under the category, ‘Condemned by Dr. Laura’ – a place of honor to be sure. How’s that for brown nosing? (wasn’t that award already claimed?) (woops, that was for brown EYES)
I am nominating my blogjournal AHH for The “Burningbird Lost in the Woods” Award because I am absolutely fascinated with the category name and want it. I live in the woods, I am often lost myself, I do have photos of forest posted in my blog, however not one that represents the category name exactly. I do have a snow covered Tree Yeti photo. Can this suffice until I capture a metaphorical image reflecting The Burningbird Lost In The Woods?
Since the grammar po-po award is taken, can I have an award for most creative pet name? I had an albino corey goldfish named Bacon. Alas, he died before I could snap pictures of him, er, her.
Here’s our entry in the “I Should Be Ashamed of My Liquor Cabinet But I’m Not” category:
Feministe Worthy?
Well, this is as weird an interpretation as you can get, but I nominate myself for Eden’s Snake. http://mousewords.blogspot.com/2005/01/feministes-anti-awards.html
I lay claim to the My Mother Does Not Know About My Blog award.
Banging Heads for Fun and Profit
I managed to get LID installed, and you can see it in operation here. I’m in the middle of another one of my multi-page essays on digital ID generally and LID specifically, and hopefully will be finished tonight, or tomorrow. I bet you’re sitting the…
I just sent to Mobog, so it should post on my blog, a photo of Joel’s mother, who is sitting in blissful ignorance of his blog. I also sent a photo of our sorry excuse for a liquor cabinet, but I see I’m too late for that one. Rats. That is a single seventeen-year-old bottle of Ariel’s non-alcoholic champagne (but is it still non-alcoholic after seventeen years?) next to the cat food. But since I’m too late to claim that one, I’ll claim the Sheep in Wolf’s Clothing Award, and look for some way to dress up one of the sheep from my creche. Just give me a little while, and it will be on my blog.
Aupdate explains where Mary’s gin is:
Feministe Worthy?
Weehaw! Yippee! I won! Thank you, thank you very much. I was the only entrant, wasn’t I?
I think Bacon was getting back at me for referring to her as him, despite his/her plainly visible, icky, unfertilized fishy clutch of eggs clinging to the side of the bowl. And also, my fishsitter forgot to feed it.
I really wanted a chinchilla, you know. A chinchilla I would have named Gloves.
Damn, I didn’t catch this contest until now. I could have easily won the “Most Egregious Hate Mail” award, but alas I nuke them before getting past the second sentence full of “you cunt” and “man-hater.” Plus, these people can’t spell to save their lives.
What a fun way to start the week, thank you Lauren! AHH officially won in the “Burningbird Lost In The Woods” category by sheer timeliness of nomination. At the time of AHH’s nomination, I was unaware of Shelley’s Burningbird weblog or Shelley’s walks in the woods, which brings clarity to what the Burningbird Lost In The Woods category name means. Lauren indicates I beat out Shelley at her own award. I would be very delighted to share this award with Shelley of Burningbird.
Damn. I *thought* I could go for Office Supplies considering how many office shots I have…but apparently 99% of all pictures are of office toys and/or what I playacted with them. Um, nevermind :)
Feministe Anti-Awards
Lauren at Feministe is giving me the chance to share my fascination with office supplies with the world. I want The “Loveliest Office Supplies” Award dammit! Here’s a picture of my pen drawer. This doesn’t show the built-in drawers behind my desk…
(Snickering.) I gave a thumbs down to the Koufax awards on another blog Saturday. The setup reeks of cronyism and has next to nothing to do with quality of blogging. If someone is part of the clique that invented the awards (or trying to brown nose his or her way into it) that person will be looked on favorably. If not. . . .
Furthermore, the same clique has a history of trying to drive good bloggers who threaten its members’ over-inflated egos out of the blogosphere, including me. The better so they can pat their own mediocre selves on the back, eh?
Lauren, do promote me for the “Most Disgusted With What Passes for Liberalism in the Blogosphere” anti-award.
“Most Disgusted With What Passes for Liberalism in the Blogosphere” Ha! I’ll keep that in mind for next time.
I know it’s late and all, but I have the perfect hairiest mole pic up on my blog now, you know, for an honorable mention or something.
Awards and a land mine
1)
To Be Kept a Secret….
i nominate myself for academic ass-hat! see blog for details. :D