Ever since Johnny Depp first appeared to me in a dream (in which we hung out at his parents’ house, who were Mormon, and he was the oldest of ten brothers and sisters all of whom named Fawn, and I was kicked out for smoking in the basement), Mr. Depp has become a dreamland benefactor. He comes to me and offers all sorts of positive advice for whatever issue it is I am facing, as in the other night when he gave me advice on how to keep Brad Pitt from breaking up my relationship with Ryan.
No more late night chai.
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