What I really hated was the introduction of skirts.

I’ve always loved long pretty dresses (even if I don’t like wearing them so much now). I even managed to convince my mother to let me wear my frilliest one to school one day in second grade – and never did so again because I quickly realised how hard it isto do cartwheels and the like in ankle length skirts.

The poor Lego princesses, however, couldn’t even walk – their stupid skirts fused their legs together. And the stupid Lego people who did this to them couldn’t even be bothered to give them nice, pretty skirts. No, their awful skirts were simply different colored roof pieces.

Worst of all though, were the boobs that turned my nice cute little Lego girls into 20 year-olds with boob jobs.

Grrr…….

Only the femme ones do. The little pigtailed Lego girls and princesses I played with in the early 80′s didn’t wear mascara.

Although, strangely enough, some of the princess from the late ’80′s (when mascara was introduced to Lego world) did. I always found this odd because I had read enough books by then to know that only “bad” women painted their faces in the middle ages.

Those translucent bits are the rare earth elements of the Lego world. A regular old gray brick is like having a clump of dirt. A translucent radar dish or printed panel is like having a 3-foot solid gold statue. You can buy small Lego countries with them, or obliterate them (whichever suits your preference).