Amanda did it the other day, and I’m stealing the idea. Shorter Townhall:
Ben Shapiro: I haven’t actually seen Munich, but since it’s written and directed by Hollywood liberals it is probably not only supporting the homosexual agenda, but also pure evil. And since it’s about the Israel-Palestine conflict and it’s not being produced by a total right-wing or left-wing nutjob, we can assume that it might actually portray the conflict as complex and nuanced when, really, it isn’t at all. What it comes down to is that Israel has never done anything wrong ever, and if you criticize the Israeli government you’re an anti-Semite, even if you are both Jewish and the producer of Schindler’s List. Additionally, Palestinians are like Hitler. Best you-couldn’t-make-it-up-if-you-tried quote: “This is the problem: Today’s left, and the Hollywood left in particular, sees everyone as human.” Oh, the horror!
Dennis Prager: Here’s some marriage advice you’ve never heard before: (1) Marry your best friend, not just some dude; (2) Marry someone who you’re actually attracted to; (3) Marry someone with basic social skills. And — you won’t believe this one — even men can find women more attractive over time. Amazing.
Thomas Sowell: Lots of us here at Townhall write really bad books that no one wants to buy. If you are a real Christian who does not hate Christmas, you will buy them.
Terance Jeffrey: The Solomon Amendment is about a basic Constitutional right: freedom of choice. The Supreme Court should use the example of car salesmen to decide this case. And that, my friends, is why I failed Understanding Consitutional Basics 101.
Armstrong Williams: The real heroes in the world are working class people who, clearly, are all men. Where are the women, you ask? Well, they get two mentions: (1) Unnamed female neighbor has a brother (Billy) who is serving in Iraq; and (2) the “peers having babies out of wedlock.” Which is how it should be.