No, I’m not kidding.
Also, our good friend Vox Day *hearts* me. Times two.
But let’s clear a few things up.
1. It’s a Miss NYU calendar, not Miss NYC. And if you read my post about it, you’ll see that I wasn’t exactly thrown into a big ole tizzy about it.
2. The Miss NYU calendar post didn’t start the Jill F discussions at xoxo. They were talking about me before I knew the site even existed.
3. I never mentioned getting the campus police involved. Or sexual harassment.
4. I didn’t “run to Daddy … the Dean of Students.” I said that I hadn’t gone to the Dean of Students (although who knows, I might).
5. The Dean of Students at NYU Law is a woman. So it would be “running to Mommy,” thank you.
6. Pablo and Doug are Lauren’s cats, not mine.
7. The pictures of me in the About Jill section are real. They are not from 10 years ago. Ten years ago I was 12.
8. No, Chris, I will not marry you.
9. Christ, people, THE CATS AREN’T MINE. And I’m not sure why cat ownership suddenly makes one’s ideas invalid.
10. Wait, am I fat, or am I “from the Heroin-Chic Christina Aguilerra scool of skank-ho, complete with slut-lines, and a blow hole she can remove the diamond from so she can breath while she is groin-snorkeling” who resembles Skeletor and needs to drop the Subway diet? Let’s at least keep the insults consistent. And what are slut lines?
Anyway, this one made my day. Hopefully the vanity posts will subside over the next few weeks.
You could point out to the “Save Jill” guy that your tragic defects (*cough* b-cup *cough*) make you not worth saving. That would help, right?
I’m thinking “Save me! I’m a pretty feminist!” would make an amusingly ironic t-shirt slogan. Does Feministe have a Cafe Press store yet?
Hey Jill,
Been meaning to write a personal, offblog note about my own experiences with stalking, extreme hatred, and it spilling into my personal life. Because I’m a mouthy feminist, I usually pick up at least one person who’s irrationally addicted to hating me. But, I haven’t had time and my plans to write over the weekend were foiled by an upgrade to WordPress 2.0 that went wonky. So. In the meanwhile, short of giving in advice in the proper context, here’s what I learned from cops and psychologists re: people like this:
1. It’s not about you, it’s about them. They want your and your friends’ attention. Don’t give it to them. If you need support, set up a private discussion list for people you trust where you can dump about it.
2.They want your fear or some signal that they’ve disrupted your life and, thus, have power over you. Don’t give it to them.
I doubt that this person is a stalking weirdo or like any of the other creeps I’ve encountered. Rather, he just wants to amuse himself and like-minded people. Still, the pirnciple holds: don’t bother to acknowledge they exist. That’s what they’re looking for and they’re now pleased as punch.
Best,
Bitch
Pablo and Doug are flattered at all the attention they’re receiving. It’s far better than the Barry White tunes I sing them when I hold them down to be brushed.
(Yes, I am that crazy. Eat that, anti-feminists.)
RE: #9
See comment Four.
Well, it certainly makes one’s ideas suspect.
*flees from hail of cat-lovers’ bullets*
Lemme guess. “My First, My Last, My Everything”?
And I’m not sure why cat ownership suddenly makes one’s ideas invalid.
Because people who own psychopathic parasite-ridden feces-licking anally-spastic stink factories obviously have questionable judgment.
I miss my cat.
A bunch of anti-feminist bloggers have been obsessed with my cats for a long time. I think it’s because cats are supposed to be how we replace our need for their precious, precious sperm. That Max and Katy were actually my ex-boyfriend’s was ignored. That these two cats I have now have no opinion on whether or not I have contact with precious, precious male fluids is also not a factor.
You know, mixing inexpensive alcohol, prescription pain medications, and complications from major dental surgery, really does nothing for your coherence of thought. Just lie down, swallow the red pill, and wait for Morpheus to bring your trenchcoat and Chucks back from the dry cleaners.
Jill –
I hope you are feeling better. The dental advice email has made a lot of people anxious and nervous about you. I know that’s off-topic for this post, sorry.
And I can’t believe these people are so crazy!
Sage advice. If you ignore them, they may not go away, but at least they won’t be encouraged. With the limited amount of time and energy we all have, it’s worth asking who is worth engaging, and these people clearly aren’t.
Man, eventutally the straw-feminist will be so laden with inherent contradictions that it will tear a whole in the space-time continuum.
GODDAMN YOU IRRATIONAL WOMEN! WHY CAN’T YOU BE EASIER TO ATTACK CONSISTENTLY?
“Whole”?
Goddamn. “Seen of the crime.” “Straight-jacket.” “Could of.” “Pain-staking.”
Shall I go on?
Wow, I suppose because of all the psycho-stalkers out there it ruins the fun for us guys who just want to engage in some light-hearted fun with our intellectual rivals.
Have I said anything Jill, that you have interpreted as a threat? Sure I disagree with most of your ideas, but that doesn’t mean I hate you, I hope you can tell the difference.
Hey, I would be flattered if a “Save Chris” blog site appeared. I would find it funny and look forward to the dialgoue. Jill, while some serious issues will probably be discussed on the site, please understand that the concept in and of itself is meant to be taken tongue-in-cheek.
Besides, I love cats, that means I can’t be that bad of a guy, huh?
It’s dog ownership that makes ideas suspect. Allowing cats to own you simply shows good taste.
Uh-oh. So what does it mean that I’m totally besotted with my roommate’s cat? I’ve replaced my own sperm? The kitty will be appalled.
My kitties are neutered. I’m so confused.
That said, spaying and neutering our cats turns you, me, and Bob Barker into misandrists.
I find it funny that my first comment is “awaiting moderation.”
Just give it some time and you will come to see that I am not a bad guy. In fact, you just may come to like me. :)
On behalf of the many millions of people called Chris around the world, can I just say that this sorry waste of skin better stop polluting our honourable name, right now.
[...] s and hugs and rainbows! And the flag and America and the soliders overseas. And kittens! (Though not cats, of course. Cats, as we all know, are often the preferred pet of apartm [...]
It’s not easy advice to follow especially if, as in my case, your kid is threatened, the idiot tries to get you (and others) fired, you get mailbombed (on 14.4 dialup, unfun), and later, dealing with minor Web site alterations on my employer’s Web site yet! (they wouldn’t go to the trouble of a big defacement, just little things). Oh, and the phone harassment — which was why I brought in the cops at one time.
Your inclination is to get right in their face and you want to make it public so they’ll have to deal with public judgment for their behavior. Alas, for the real weirdos, it doesn’t work that way: they _want_ the attention.
I recall one guy, on a lefty email discussion list, who’d send me links to porn site featuring a women who shared my name. I wanted to expose the guy to the rest of the gang, to let everyone know that this was NOT alright. I just shut my mouth and that was the last I heard of him. As a feminist, I really struggled with using this tactic.
In general, my experience has been that women with strong cyberspace personas tend to attract people who really love their persona or really hate it. Nina at theslack.com has written about this, too. These people seem to hate you with a passion. Yet, instead of stay away from something they don’t like, they obsessively visit.
I just borrow from Zizek and laugh to myself: “Enjoy your symptom, asshole.” In fact, when you mouseover some categories on my site, written tonque-in-cheek, I mock these people who, yes indeedy, show up like clockwork to seethe and rage at whatever they despise. For laughs, I should send Jill some of the fantasies they’ve concocted about me. In hindsight, they’re funny but at the time they were scary. So, I understand the concern. It’s not a fun place to be.
B
See, owning cats just feeds into the whole lonely, single, ugly, fat, hairy, whore, feminist category.
If you don’t fall into one of those categories then you are not really a feminist, you’re just lost or you are an exception to the rule but you are doing it on purpose to prove a point. You sly, sly feminist you.
Does anyone else find it really ironic that Vox had the posts about the blame that women should take on in cases of their own rape?
So basically, if women don’t assume that all men are rapists, and don’t take actions to protect themselves from everyone that happens to have a penis, they are responsible for their own rape.
Yet suddenly, when a woman is assumed to take actions against sexual threats made towards her, she’s a whiney little man-hater.
Funny how that works.
You know damn well that if something did happen to Jill as a result of the postings on xoxo, these guys would be saying that it was deserved because she didn’t take the threat “seriously” enough.
Or maybe it’s deserved because she’s a feminist. Apparently we deserve a lot of things merely for our political leanings.
After reading that blog, and the items from VD, I really am tempted to withdraw my question about educating folks on feminism, and saying bring on the smackdown…
Starla, you confuse me with this “whore” thing. I thought we were frigid bitches who hate men and think all sex is rape (Andrea Dworkin, duh!). And then I thought we were lesbians, but not the good kind of lesbians who go on Howard Stern and feel each other up for male attention; the bad kind, who care about the men in their lives but who just aren’t that interested in pleasing them sexually. And then I learned that we manipulate men into sleeping with us and abort their babies for sport. Then after that, I read some MRA sites and found out that we try and trick these men into impregnating us, we marry them, and then we divorce them and take their kids, their money, and all their stuff. And now I hear that we’re whores.
I’m super confused. And shouldn’t combat-boot-wearing, softball-playing butch lesbian feminists own Rottweilers or something? Are the cats only for the crazy ladies, or do the sluts get to have them, too? Please explain.
[...]
1.10.2006
Currently Wondering
Posted by Lauren @ 4:23 pm
So, is it cool for married women to own cats?
This entry was [...]
[...]
1.10.2006
Currently Wondering
Posted by Lauren @ 4:23 pm
So, is it cool for married women to own cats?
This entry was [...]
We have the right to own cats (I wrote a whole manifesto about it several years ago). Currently I have two cats–one was already mine, one was my husband’s. I’m a feminist. And I’m hot hot HOT.