Author: has written 1251 posts for this blog.

Lauren founded this blog in 2001.
Return to: Homepage | Blog Index

31 Responses

  1. mythago
    mythago January 12, 2006 at 1:22 pm |

    *coffee take*

  2. B Moe
    B Moe January 12, 2006 at 1:27 pm |

    You are truly evil.

  3. KnifeGhost
    KnifeGhost January 12, 2006 at 1:39 pm |

    I clued in about three links in. But I intend to pursue it to the end.

  4. KnifeGhost
    KnifeGhost January 12, 2006 at 1:40 pm |

    I clued in about three links in. But I intend to pursue it to the end.

  5. Betsy
    Betsy January 12, 2006 at 1:45 pm |

    Ok, the pilot one really IS the best blonde joke ever. I just sent it to all my favorite blondes (including one who IS a pilot!).

  6. Liberal Serving
    Liberal Serving January 12, 2006 at 1:48 pm |

    You Fucking Misogynist. Or, The Best Blond Joke Ever

    Lauren makes me smile:Q: What do you call a blond who flies a plane?A: A pilot, you fucking misogynist.And I don’t really understand it, but she also links to this joke, which a bunch of other people say is funny,

  7. kate.d.
    kate.d. January 12, 2006 at 1:55 pm |

    i’m kind of embarrassed to say it took me about five clicks to catch on. my hair color has always been difficult to define, though :)

  8. Bill from INDC
    Bill from INDC January 12, 2006 at 1:58 pm |

    Blonde jokes aren’t misogynistic! That’s outrageous.

    Hey, btw, why did God create blondes?

    Because sheep can’t bring beer from the fridge.

    Why did God create brunettes?

    Neither could the blondes.

    Ba-dump-BUMP.

  9. WestEnder
    WestEnder January 12, 2006 at 2:11 pm |

    3 links and a laugh!

  10. Dadahead
    Dadahead January 12, 2006 at 2:12 pm |

    I intend to pursue it to the end.

    I tried. Eventually, it just goes around in circles.

  11. a nut
    a nut January 12, 2006 at 2:17 pm |

    Yeah, I figured it out and wanted to pursue it to the end but after awhile, I just got tired of clicking.

  12. Chris T.
    Chris T. January 12, 2006 at 2:21 pm |

    I’ve always heard that one as a race joke.

    Q: What do you call a black man flying a plane?
    A: A pilot. What are you, some kind of racist?

  13. Lauren
    Lauren January 12, 2006 at 2:27 pm |

    Chris, I like to tell this joke because I’m a) a feminist, and b) blond.

  14. Anna
    Anna January 12, 2006 at 2:49 pm |

    Even better, in a lot of ways, is that blonde jokes have started circulating that refer to (blonde) men. It doesn’t just throw the misogyny of the traditional blonde jokes back in your face, it recreates the stereotype in a way that even anti-feminists can’t fight.

    (Not that I think it’s fun to imply that blonde me are dumb, but I am working on the assumption here that these jokes are harmless because nobody is actually going to believe that, subconsciously or otherwise – in contrast with jokes about blonde women)

  15. Robert
    Robert January 12, 2006 at 3:04 pm |

    My favorite blonde joke ever.

    (Blondes unite, take back the…what rhymes with unite?)

  16. kactus
    kactus January 12, 2006 at 3:12 pm |

    Robert, you’re right, that is a great joke, and I’m not a big fan of jokes. I can’t remember them, I can’t tell them right, and usually I don’t get them. I think my sense of humor is too wierd to be placated with ordinary jokes. Which brings me to the mystery of whatever you all are talking about. When I click the link it just loads, and loads, and loads without ever going anywhere. Is that the joke? Once more, I don’t get it. Sigh.

  17. tas
    tas January 12, 2006 at 4:35 pm |

    Chris, I like to tell this joke because I’m a) a feminist, and b) blond.

    I thought it was because you’re a pilot.

  18. David Thompson
    David Thompson January 12, 2006 at 5:26 pm |

    Meh, I like this one better:

    Q: What do you call a blonde who flies a plane?
    A: “Ma’am,” as respectfully as possible. She’s the one at the controls and she doesn’t want to hear any more of your stupid blonde jokes.

  19. Marco
    Marco January 12, 2006 at 5:33 pm |

    That’s so cruel…the inimitable link.

    What do you call a blonde who dyes her hair black?

    Artificial intelligence.

    Does hair color really rate?

    On the level of racism and sexism?

    The South Park guys may be Bushistas, but I think to be human we must make fun of everything.

  20. Hugo
    Hugo January 12, 2006 at 5:36 pm |

    It’s a fine joke, Lauren — I’ll use it liberally, though I might change the expletive dependin’ on the company.

  21. Lauren
    Lauren January 12, 2006 at 5:42 pm |

    Just be sure to keep the righteous indignation.

  22. Slim Slow Slider
    Slim Slow Slider January 12, 2006 at 6:17 pm |

    oh, Lauren, thanks so much for the pilot one. it has made my day.

  23. Creeping Jenny
    Creeping Jenny January 12, 2006 at 6:18 pm |

    My favorite blonde joke was told to me by a math teacher. (Warning: you have to have had enough calc to know how to integrate, in order for the joke to work.)

    Two mathematicians are sitting in a restaurant, arguing cordially. “The common man in the street,” declares the first mathematician, “knows absolutely nothing about mathematics. He cannot perform so much as a simple integration.”

    “Nonsense,” says the second. “Laymen these days are extremely sophisticated. Why, I imagine that even that blonde waitress over there would be capable of integration.”

    They argue some more, and then the first mathematician excuses himself to the bathroom. His friend immediately calls the blonde waitress over to the table and slips her a $20. “Listen,” he says, “I’m going to ask you a mathematical question in a minute. I want you to answer the question, ‘one third x cubed.’ Got it?” The waitress repeats the syllables, “one thir-dex-skubed” a few times, and nods.

    When the first mathematician returns, the second mathematician declares, “I’ll bet you fifty dollars that our waitress can integrate the function x squared.” His colleague agrees, and they call the waitress over and ask her to integrate x squared. She repeats her line faithfully, “one thir-dex-sckubed”, and the first mathematician dutifully pays up. The waitress smiles, and as she walks away, she adds, over her shoulder, “pllus a constant”.

  24. Chuck
    Chuck January 12, 2006 at 6:36 pm |

    You know what’s really funny?

    People on LiveJournal never tell that many jokes. God damn, so unrealistic.

  25. mikez
    mikez January 13, 2006 at 12:02 am |

    It took me 6 clicks to get it. Blondes are off the hook, dark browns are dumber.

  26. pansauce
    pansauce January 13, 2006 at 3:19 am |

    Creeping Jenny, thanks.

    I’m adding it to my list of math jokes.

  27. Are blonde jokes going too far?   at  Grendel’s Kitchen

    […] Culture

    The best blonde joke ever  Read through to the end! (via Fem […]

  28. betsyl
    betsyl January 13, 2006 at 3:21 pm |

    i have gone and stolen this whole entire post. but i have credited it to you, and linked back. (i am not mentioning the part where i was glad not to be drinking while reading. because that’s just undignified.)

  29. Tony
    Tony January 13, 2006 at 3:33 pm |

    That’s very funny!

  30. mythago
    mythago January 14, 2006 at 1:27 pm |

    David’s is a close second.

    blonde jokes have started circulating that refer to (blonde) men

    They always did. This is so that the teller of the joke could indignantly pretend that they aren’t being sexist, cuz the joke is about men TOO! It’s not “remaking the stereotype”. It’s pretending that the stereotype doesn’t exist.

    I was blonde back when these things were in their last cycle. When I replied with ‘brunette jokes’, people would get all wide-eyed and say gosh, that was mean! Hello, fuckwad, did you think that coming up and making jokes about my haircolor making me a dumb slut was kindly?

  31. BuffaloPundit  » Blog Archive   » Jokey
    BuffaloPundit » Blog Archive » Jokey January 16, 2006 at 12:12 pm |

    […]

    « 411 is a joke in my town

    Jokey

    The best blonde joke ever.

    This entr […]

Comments are closed.

The commenting period has expired for this post. If you wish to re-open the discussion, please do so in the latest Open Thread.