So, those big things ahead. Promise not to hate me too much.
After almost exactly six years as a blogger, about three of them at this domain, I believe it’s time for me to bow out. My dedication to my writing here has waned and I am tired of the oddly daunting responsibility of owning a website that runs significant traffic with my name attached. Running this blog takes far more time and dedication than I’d like to admit, and it’s time and dedication I can no longer afford to expend now that I am out of college. This is a decision I made some time ago and grappled with up until I hit publish on this post.
Hosting the Carnival of the Feminists was my love letter to all of you that take the time to speak out and stand up and be brave and put yourself on the line for a public audience. Yes blogging is fun, but it is also difficult. It is difficult to get criticized and attacked and get up and chance more. Even when we don’t use our real names or hang onto some sort of pseudonymity we put ourselves out there in ways that are emotionally risky. If you’re good at this, you are personally invested in it. Responses from those who enjoy your writing and challenge your assumptions are an intrinsic reward, and those who lurk around waiting for you to fuck up, well, we have names for those kinds of people. Kudos to all of you who assert your Selves regardless.
I’m certain you’ll be as pleased as I am to welcome on two new bloggers that Jill and I have recruited to take my place. Though you’ll definitely recognize their names if you hang around in the comments here and at other feminist blogs, neither of them have been committed bloggers before now.
Thank you, Jill, for joining me last year and (kicking my ass at this blogging business) agreeing to take over this little community. Thank you Mystery Bloggers #1 and #2 for taking on this challenge. Thank you, Ms. Marcotte, who helped me write a gazillion posts on this blog. Thank you, Roxanne, who encouraged me to get with the designing thing already. Thank you, Samantha, for validating my blogging obsession (and my knitting obsession) and making me realize this isn’t just some dumb thing that people do. Thank you, everyone who guestblogged here when I was still solo and needed a break. Thank you to everyone who supported me on this site, who sent me and Ethan all the wonderful books and gifts, who donated to the Feed Lauren and Ethan Fund this winter, who commented here every day or never at all, who linked my posts even when I thought my writing was crap, who stick around and debate one another, who have brightened my day with a laugh, and to all of you who continue to do what you do on your own digital playgrounds. Thank you for fact-checking my lazy ass and making me a better writer and a more concise thinker. Thank you most of all for being my emotional godsend — it ain’t easy to be an feminist today, especially if you live in small town Indiana. Whenever I felt unstimulated, frustrated, and irritated, I turned here.
The question now is whether or not I can actually leave my baby, my blog, behind. I’ve nurtured this thing from obscurity to what it is today by spending countless hours reading, writing, editing, designing, fighting, mulling, brooding, obsessing, and neglecting my household duties. You have no idea how hard it will be for me, something excrutiating to admit, but it’s time, in part because this obsessive habit has begun to impede on my real world responsibilities.
Thank you again.
I’ll be around.