Oh, yuck! Not only disgusting and disrespectful of women, but, for the men – having a job where you’re required to vomit to get paid? Please let it be fake vomiting. But even then, yuck!

what I thought was UNSPEAKABLE sexual favors on a first date, meet-and-greet

Eep! It’s been almost twenty years since I was available, and I remember getting sexual propositions in general terms on very short acquaintance, but nothing like that.

What concerns me most of all, and this is proof positive of what I referred to as the “Pornification of America,” is once folks have become blasse about bukkake, WHAT else will come down the pike to offend or shock?

One thing I noticed when I was single after leaving my WASband was the propensity of men to ask me lewd, crude and socially unacceptable, what I thought was UNSPEAKABLE sexual favors on a first date, meet-and-greet. One man even revealed to me during our date, that the thing that compelled him to go out and meet me were my large feet, how they reminded him of his mother’s, and after we ordered our lunch, but before it arrived at our table, he let it be known he wanted to ejaculate on my feet.

To me, the bukkake phenom, is indicative of not just the continued objectivication of women as sex objects, but also part and parcel of a greater social-communication breakdown between the genders.

But has anyone actually used the correct term for this phenomena, aka the facials?

“Bukkake.” Google it. You just increased your word power by one.

However, instead of making me horny or disgusted, the word bukkake makes me think of “cake.” Kind of ironic if one were to view semen as icing…

On a personal note, and tho I don’t participate in this practice, I’d say that oppression/domination is in the eye of the receiver and the owner of the semen-filled-shlong in question.

I “do” believe that bukkake scenes in porn IS for the shock value, that, “Look at what that bitch just took.” (Another phenomenon I’ve noticed lately are videos where men are screwing women, and spontaneously vomit on them… Actually I find this more disgusting and disrespectful of women).
Regarding the mythology of the power of the dong… does anyone remember that Indiana Jones flick, “The Temple of Doom?” The holy stone which was the focus of that movie was known as a “Shiva Lingam.” A somewhat crudely phallic stone with three horizontal stripes.

Quite literally, “Shiva Lingam” means, “(Lord) Shiva’s penis.” This is a commonplace statue one might encounter in a Hindu temple, as a statue for devotionals for Shivaite Hindus. The idea is to “pierce” the subconscious.

Interesting but true… and even more interesting when you consider my husband is a “cradle Hindu,” and he never knew that a Shiva Lingam was literally Shiva’s penis until he met me.

This next nugget might intrigue the feminists in this forum, that in Hinduism, the deity just as powerful if not MORE powerful than Shiva (Shiva is the destroyer of obstacles), is Kali-Ma (if you remember, the line in the Temple of Doom “Kali-ma! Shakti devi!” (Kali-ma! Give me strength!), the powerful female counterpoint to Shiva.

If you were to Google “Goddess Kali ma” you will find all sorts of imagery, mostly of a black (or blue) Kali-ma, stomping on Shiva, her red tongue flicking in rage, and a belt of skulls around her waist.

IMHO, the true myth about the power of the pecker is all a jedi mindtrick, and one that countless women have indulged men in for centuries.

Post Script:

[Totally tongue in cheek]

Joke:
Why are woman so poor at math?

Punchline:
Because all their lives they are told this (and THIS is defined by a hand jesture where the teller of the joke puts their index finger about an inch from their thumb) is eight inches.

this article is right on. ending male domination requires (on top of many other things) deconstructing the myth of the penis.

i dont think most penis bearing individuals know much about our anatomy beyond an erection. i mean… i learned enough in middle school sex ed to make me feel bad and/or scared to masterbate.
did you know the sperms ‘tail’ operates like a propellar? wow amazing!

this article subtly points out that there arent many sex toys out there aimed at the penis, well besides super objectifying blow up dolls and other degrading things.
where are the empowering sex toys for the men, womyn, trannies with dicks?
if you know of any let me know.

That’s not to say that there is no power dynamic at work. There is a very strong power dynamic. But just because I do something in a scene as a submissive, and even that doing it makes me feel submissive, does not mean that I’m disgusted by it or even that I don’t like it.

Isn’t the point still to degrade and debase, though? I ask this seriously. It’s been my understanding that the point of such activities is pleasure though debasement, but Thomas, maybe you could speak to this issue a bit more?

Well, I’m not Thomas, and he (or she, how would I know?) may have different thoughts on the matter, but if I may?

Here’s what I think. Pleasure comes from all sorts of different places. There’s bodily pleasure — the feeling of something warm on or against you, the soft touch, the rough touch, the smack across the bottom or the face or in the balls (not for everyone, that one!) — and there’s let’s call it psychological pleasure — the feeling of being safe in your lover’s arms, the feeling of being lost in wild abandon, the feeling of giving over control to a partner. And, yes, the feeling of being humilated and degraded. Of course, the bodily and the psychological intersect so completely that sorting them out like this is really artificial, but setting that aside, it remains that there’s a whole lot of range within which pleasure can be (not to say “must be” or even necessarily “should be”) achieved. Now, in my experience, people bring all sorts of things into the bed (or kitchen counter, or car, or public restroom, or…) with them. That “stuff” informs and shapes our experience of sex, and it should not be surprising that often we work a lot of that “stuff” out through sex. And we work different stuff out through the same acts, and the same stuff out through different acts. I have met women for whom the submissive role was very enjoyable because their day-to-day lives did not allow them a moment’s softness or hesitation — submission in bed helped balance a dominant day-to-day demeanor. I’ve met women, too, for whom the submissive role was enjoyable because of overpowering parents or ex-lovers, or because their mothers (or fathers) were submissive, or because that’s their idea of what a woman is or should be. And I’ve met women for whom the submissive role was enjoyable because it was hot — and next time they might just as well be the dominant one. (I should note that I’ve slept with very few of these women, as whatever their reasons, I don’t find submissiveness appealing at all.) And about all the same reasons apply to women who enjoy being dominant.

So, yes, being bound and defecated on may well be about humiliation and degradation — which tells us nothing about the character of the people engaging in it (except, again, that they aren’t me). Or it may be about learning — as some have insisted above in relation to semen and vaginal fluids and menstural blood and spit and female ejaculate (and nobody’s mentioned sweat, but that’s in there too!) — to accept all the parts of one’s lover, or to reject artificial cultural boundaries between “clean” and “dirty”. It may just be because it’s a taboo, and some people like breaking taboos. Until you’ve walked a mile in another man’s diaper or another woman’s barbed-wire bra, it’s impossible to say what motivates their sexual proclivities.

The question isn’t so much what does a particular act “have to” mean or be about, but how does the particular act in a particular context have to tell us about day-to-day oppression or domination? One woman’s submission may well be a surrender to 10,000 years of patriarchy (as may another woman’s dominance); another woman’s submission (or dominance) may well be the rejection of same.

I’ve been wondering about the word “facial” itself. It’s the deliberate appropriation of a word that normally applies to a beauty procedure that women give themselves (or have a cosmetologist give them). It’s nt necessarily the only term to use for ejaculating on a woman’s face, but it seems to be the only one folks use these days.

*tested partners only

There are people who create incredibly intimite and respectful situations together while one is tied up and the other is urinating or defecating on them

Second.

Isn’t the point still to degrade and debase, though? I ask this seriously. It’s been my understanding that the point of such activities is pleasure though debasement, but Thomas, maybe you could speak to this issue a bit more?