But if you do want to reverse your ridiculous thought pattern about this, your best bet is to see a therapist, not ask a blog.

when you all reach my age

Heh.

How do you draft a pleading without being familiar with the procedural law of the jurisdiction? Do you do mostly Federal or State court work? How long have you been practicing law and how many laterals has your firm hired from other jurisdictions with little or no Federal Court experience? How big is the firm you work for? I have never worked for a big firm and medium and small firm practice is radically different. Your attempt to minimize my past success is a transparent effort to minimize my loss of career advancement thereby mitigating the damages imposed upon my career by the sacrifices made to accommodate my wife’s career. You’re arguing irrelevant points. At the time we left I was starting to bring in more business than I had in the past. How much more would I have brought in? I don’t know but in the last year there I brought in about 18 new clients. In the year before I had brought in only 6. At my present place of employ I am starting to bring in new clients, three this year so far, but the fee split is less, a third of a third. In my prior locale it was 50% of a third. I am not going to convince you of the merits of Mr. Noer’s article. But my experience is very clear. I made more there then, than I do now, here. My skill level is no less. I am older and therefore not as attractive to firms and I don’t have a “book of business”, at least not a significant one.

As far as the language is concerned, you are correct, Lawyers curse worse than sailors. Does that mean its attractive or appealing. NO it is not. We work in a profession that is generally reviled. When I graduated from law school I promised I would change that one person at a time. So I avoid use of that kind of language as best as I can. I am not perfect in that regard. And by the way I won’t end up a drunk, because I don’t drink.

Finally your last sentence-It sounds like the back story is more complicated– what did you mean by that?

Lawyer’s

Vincent, I’ve been practicing law for almost at long as you, in both state and federal courts. I’ve commented here before that I grew up on a construction site and, my more formal writing notwithstanding, I swear like a guy from the framing crew in person. But in my experience, that’s not uncommon among lawyers. Most of the warstories I have heard and told at the water cooler begin either, “so this fuckin’ guy …” or “here’s the latest bullshit story …”

What I don’t expect from lawyers is plain grammatical error, like confusing the plural with the possessive: the former makes us look insensitive and boorish, which is sometimes true, but the latter makes us look stupid, which is a much more serious matter for one of the three traditional “learned professions.”

Also, Zuzu has a point about transferrable skills. The substantive law is easily learned, but the abilities to take and defend a depo, draft a pleading, stand up in court and persuade a judge, open to a jury, examine a witness, and negotiate a settlement; those skills take years to learn and are worth far more than familiarity with the law of the jurisdiction. My firm takes in people who are radically changing practice areas, and we only knock them back a year or two in the progression. I have even seen people move from transactional to litigation without going back to square one. It sounds like the back story is more complicated.

By the way is ZuZu a lawyer? And she called me an “asshole”? That’s nice, but not deserved.

And the reason for Vincent’s career miasma becomes more apparent. I imagine him played by the guy who played the priggish vice principal in Boston Public:

Vincent: “Hey, are you fellows heading out for lunch? Mind if I join you? Where are you going?”

New Guy In Office: “PF Changs!”

[other attorneys groan almost audibly, roll eyes, glare at New Guy]

Vincent: “Oh, let’s not go there. PF Changs’ food is too spicy. It inflames my pyloric valve. Why don’t we all go to Applebees?

Just Made Partner: “Because PF Changs sucks, but Applebees sucks worse.”

Vincent: “You know, attorneys really shouldn’t use language such as that. It is ignorant and obnoxious. But you’re smart, though naive. You’ll learn the ways of the world soon enough. So are we on for Applebees?”

Just Made Partner: “Why, um, SURE. We’ll go to Applebee’s. But the thing is, um… oh. I don’t have room in my Range Rover. Why don’t you meet us there, Vermint… I mean Vincent.”

[suppressed giggling]

Vincent: “Sounds like a plan!”

[others depart]

Vincent, thinking, voiceover: I wonder why he did that air quote thing with his fingers when he said ‘meet us there?’ Oh, well. Bloomin’ Onion, here I come!”