All I know of you is your assumption (to me and everyone else) that I don’t know the difference between an orgy and an orgasm and that I forgot a conversation about *sex* with my *mother*.

So we got off on the wrong foot.

But I don’t think I’ll ask him yet, but I’ll keep everything I see here and at the sites mentioned in mind when I finally do.

I was taking valium vaginally – I had, to quote someone who wasn’t whacked on pain pills at the message board I used to post at, “a vagina that didn’t give a fuck.”

Friday, I’m getting a uterine nerve block, which is a shot to the tenderest spot in my pelvic/abdominal cavity! But if it works, no more pain pills!!!!!!

Kaitlyn, I can’t really be sure if you’re asexual or not, but I can share my personal experiences. I’m 22, and I’d never kissed anyone until I started university, four months short of 18. After the first kiss, I did a lot of things very quickly with a number of guys, but I’ve settled into a monogamous relationship now. We’ve been together almost two years, and having sex with him just feels like one of a range of fun, intimate things that we do.

I was interested in sex as a teenager, but I wasn’t really interested in having sex with any of my peers, even when I thought they were cute. I think it played into the way I was raised, and I was also afraid of becoming distracted and “all wrapped up in a boy.”

A few other things: I never used tampons until university, and I still don’t always use them. Don’t believe everything an ad tells you, eh? Just wear whatever you’re comfortable with. I find that even when I use a tampon, I often have to wear a pad as back-up anyway.

I haven’t used the Always brand in years, but I remember that it had that dry-weave stuff that used to irritate me. I switched to Stayfree, because the pads are just smooth and cottony on top, and the irritation went away. There are reusable pads on the market that don’t have fragrances and bleach and stuff in them, but I’m not sure how accessible they would be to you.

I have a very narrow vagina too. My own finger fit fine when I was a teenager, but the first time a guy did it to me with just one finger… I was sore for days afterwards. I don’t get sore from fingering (with one or two fingers) anymore, but I do still get sore from sex. I’m ok with that, but you might not be, and it’s totally your decision to make.

Are you nervous about foreign objects going in there? It might just be a matter of relaxing. But definitely, the next time you go to the doctor, mention it to him/her. They’re technically required to answer your questions if time allows, even if they look all annoyed.

i’ll go back to doing that.

you seemed to have been confused about why you didn’t have sexual feelings.

i said:

a) there are people who are in fact asexual,

but:

b) i wouldn’t be too concerned about that since you’re still maturing sexually.

thanks for the reply though.

Of course I’m growing into it! Whether you saw my age or not, it’s pretty damn obvious I haven’t been alive for two decades.

But it came across like that – if you don’t have sex with the person you’re dating, because you’re not ready to have sex with him or her yet, something seems wrong.

Plus, I spend a lot of time irrational.

And I can’t thank everyone enough for answering as honestly as possible.

I have wondered if I’m a just a straight, asexual woman.

Why? My mom hasn’t had sex (that I know of) since Christmas 1998. Maybe she has had it with her on again/off again boyfriend (they’re off b/c she wasn’t at home when he drove past the house – she was taking Becky to her friend’s. That was a couple years ago.)

So, sorry for the TMI, but she hasn’t had sex, maybe her libido’s dropped as she’s aged, but she doesn’t seem to want it. I asked about asexuality, because it seemed she was, so maybe that explained my urges… or lack thereof.

I definitely think it is narrow. My finger fits in fine (vaginal valium) but anything else and I scream. My mom had to put in my first tampon, and it hurt and I felt a pressure the whole time.

In addition to the not caring about sex – I notice that so-and-so’s cute, but I don’t want to have sex with him, I just want to look at him or something – which can make you a pariah, there’s also the pad thing!

They’re compared to diapers in commercials, but I can’t wear anything but! Even though they irritate my skin, I need to know what color and how much is coming out, as opposed to staying in. (Clean pad, bloody toilet paper.)

I do feel like a freak, and I’m afraid to look for these things, because when I type in my full name, I get a lot of things about porn stars, so if I actually looked up ‘teenage sexuality’ on google, I can’t imagine the filth I’d have to wade through.