Celine Dion proves her commitment to feminism by preparing to eat this baby.
Sweet Jesus I wish I could have made that headline up myself.** But no, that is Mike Adams’ new definition of feminism. Verbatim. And if you don’t think it’s totally hilarious, you were probably an abused communist emotionally disturbed child, and you have no sense of humor.
I would write more, but that would actually require me to read Mike’s column, so you should just go here instead. Per usual, Mike is responding to yet another feminist bull-dyke stripper abortionist named Daisy who either approached or emailed him and yet again confirmed that all feminists are crazy bull-dyke stripper abortionists, but who also imparted upon him the wisdom that feminist bull-dyke stripper abortionists have sex with anything in sight so that they can get pregnant and have hundreds of orgasms at Planned Parenthood. Really. It’s turning into the latest teenage sex craze. It’ll be in Dear Abby next week.
World O’Crap really nails it:
(You know, some day that strident dyke who always accosts Dr. Adams after a speech will climb into the cab driven by that guy who cruises around La Guardia all day waiting for a chance to vindicate Thomas Friedman’s preconceptions, and we’ll finally get the whole world straightened out.)
A girl can dream, right? Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go “slaughter some innocent children,” as the kids are calling it these days.
via Amanda.
*Who knew that the Bush administration has so many feminists in its ranks? And if you don’t think that’s funny then you are a humorless disturbed conservative who has just proven my theory that conservatives are defined by being humorless and disturbed. So thank you. I expect to see my check from Town Hall any day now.
**Clearly this is an ongoing problem: I try to mock these dudes by being battier and more hyperbolic than they are, and they still out-crazy me.
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…do kids really sleep like that once they’re, you know, out of the womb? It’s kind of creepy.
Well, if I knew that was all I had to do tp be a feminist! Now I know what to with this baby sleeping on my lap.
I’ve never seen a baby sleep like that, and my son has some wierd sleeping positions. His current favorite is his butt up in the air with his knees tucked towards his chest.
I’m so confused. Darwin has to be right about the theory of evolution in order for Mike’s strawbiologist to continue getting laid?
I am baffled in ways I did not know where possible.
Someone should tell Celine Dion that this is not the secret of eternal youth.
OK, that caption was the best laugh I got this week, thanks! :)
That aside though, what’s that coming out of the baby? Cotton candy? A cloud? A really misshapen teapot? From the location, I’d guess wings, only they look like anything but.
I think those are “wings” photoshopped from orchid petals. The baby is an orchid fairy, or something. *gag*
he must be referring to abortion, right (which in itself is not murder but that is for another day). i truly think certain men like that fear feminism because they do not want women to have power.
That’s a baby frill, sort of like the ones that go on a crown roast of lamb. Meant to spiff up the baby for proper table presentation.
Great post. Thanks for the World O’ Crap quote about how these guys, and their enablers like Friedman, always just happen to run into some person who completely validates their world views. Why can’t that happen to me? There I was, sitting on the subway car, remarking how crowded the car was to the person next to me, when he launched into a bitter diatribe against the know-nothing paternalism of Justice Kennedy’s opinion in Carhart. I know, unexpected, but quite welcome.
Y’know, I thought I was reasonably intelligent – graduated high school, have a college degree, am attending grad school for my PhD…
…and yet I can’t make sense out of a damn word he said. About all I got was “I hate women!”
Though certainly not in the same class as Dr Mike, you should check out what the supposedly intelligent conservatives are saying about comparable worth over at http://gregmankiw.blogspot.com/
That pic with Celine creeps me out, though, something about the conjunction of her with the baby in that weird posture – I almost believe she is about to eat it!
She’s not about to eat the baby. She’s about to chew off its invisible cocoon so its wings can unfold. Then she teaches the baby to eat from the flower using its nose.
Jeez, doesn’t anyone know about fetal development any more?
Mmmmm…babies.
Prop baby? Made of play-do? Real babies don’t bend like that, do they?
And if you don’t think it’s totally hilarious, you were probably an abused communist emotionally disturbed child, and you have no sense of humor.
So since I do think it’s totally hilarious, I can’t be accused of not having a sense of humor? Or do I have to laugh raucously at it in appreciation rather than mockery?
Real babies are pretty darn bendy. Consider how they get out.
I’ve seen plenty of babies sleeping in that pose, although those babies were usually on a nice, comfy bed or rug and were in no danger of being eaten. A more sensible pose for this baby would be “fleeing in horror”.
I just went to the Townhall site. I’m… never… going… there… again.
Hold me!
Except babies of that age can’t really flee in horror, so it would be more, oh, flailing its limbs uselessly in horror. And spitting up, which for babies is a sign of distress, a reflex or possibly just a way to pass a slow hour.
Wait…if the baby can flail its limbs in horror that would mean it’s uncooked? I have to eat raw babies to be a feminist?
The deals off. I only eat my babies roasted. Or possibly stewed.
Wait…if the baby can flail its limbs in horror that would mean it’s uncooked?
Not to mention, uh, alive.
Well, when people are eating live scorpions, this isn’t much, I guess.
My interpretation was along the lines of “I hate feminists because liberals are getting laid and I’m not”.
You should never eat babies stewed. It’s hard enough to catch them when sober.
Don’t you know that cooked babies lose all their nutrients? And don’t ask me about frozen.
Think baby carpaccio, Tapetum. Thinly sliced over field greens with a lemon vinaigrette.
Mmmm, duo of free-range human infant: lightly seared with essence of white truffle, and raw, with a touch of olive oil.
What wine goes with baby?
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