I’m not making this up! In an essay titled “Why Liberals Lie About Sex,” Kevin McCullough wrote:
Liberals want your child to have sex. They want this to occur in spite of your religious, health, or parental objections. They are willing to substitute false thinking for solid fact on the consequences of what will happen. And they do so while simultaneously insulting you and your child’s ability to comprehend, discern, and choose behaviors that make the most sense.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA!!
Hooooboy, I’ve got to hand it to Kevin. I haven’t read anything so hilariously irrational, paranoid and delusional in a long time! With an opener like that, I was surprised he didn’t go on to say that the Democratic party is run by Satan, himself!
What’s got Kevin so worked up is the recent news that teen condom use is way up since 1991:
Of those who had sex during a three-month period in 2005, 63 percent used condoms. That’s up from 46 percent in 1991.
Kevin is pissed that major news outlets like the Chicago Tribune and the New York Times chose to highlight the condom statistic in their headlines, rather than the less impressive news that teen sex is down slightly:
In 2005, 47 percent of high school students reported having had sexual intercourse, down from 54 percent in 1991. The rate has remained the same since 2003.
THIS is the real news, says Kevin! Not sinful, dirty condom use, THIS!
Even outlets that did mention the reduced numbers of teens engaging in sexual activity nearly always also mentioned the increase in condom use.
The nerve!! How dare they mention teenage condom use as if it were something positive that normal teens in healthy relationships might do!
And it is very much worth pointing out that under the Bush Administration this is the sixth year in a row in terms of the drop of teen birth rates. Another stark contrast in recent history given that under the permissive Clinton regime the United States reached its all-time high in that regard.
That’s a lie. The teen birth rate reached its peak in the golden 1950s, and has been falling steadily since the invention of the pill. Even the very articles that Kevin cites say:
The teen birthrate, the report said, was 21 per 1,000 young women ages 15-17 in 2005, down from 39 births per 1,000 teens in 1991.
1991! That was the end of the godless Reagan and Bush 1 years! (The teen birth rate actually went up a little bit in the late 1980s.) Bill Clinton took office in 1993, and the teen birth rate has continued to decline ever since!
The truth is, liberals don’t want anyone’s child to have sex. When children reach puberty, they take an interest in sex all on their own. It’s natural. Liberals recognize this reality and try to deal with it constructively, while conservatives stick their heads in the sand and pretend it isn’t so. These statistics confirm that the constructive approach works.
It’s also natural to pee on the floor, yet both liberals and conservatives disapprove of that practice. “Natural” is not a useful test of whether something is good and worthwhile.
They really ought to just admit that the statistic that truly bothers them is how openly our culture is willing to actually DISCUSS sex openly.
David- To continue your metaphor, liberals want to potty train people, while conservatives want you to hold it in until some arbitrary cutoff point.
Shesus Christ. I don’t want my teenager having sex, but if he is going to do it, I’d prefer he wear a condom so he doesn’t catch a disease that might kill him or get a girl pregnant. Is this really that hard to comprehend?
And the intelligent way to deal with that is to train children to use the toilet, not to demand that they stop urinating.
Oh…thank you, thank you wingnuts for my first good belly laugh of the day. The unhinged illogic is just hysterical!
And, Mr. Thompson, did you really think out that analogy before you posted it? I’m thinking that the response is only too obvious and I can’t imagine that was what you were after. But thank you as well.
Actually, it’s just natural to pee. Where you pee isn’t biologically determined. Because peeing on the floor is less than ideal, we pee in holes or in toilets or in some other reserved space. As Trailer Park says, we deal with nature’s demand — we don’t require that children stop urinating.
I’m now picturing David’s parents keeping him in diapers until he gets married, at which time he and his new wife will need to potty-train each other without any further instruction.
Hmm. Well, it may explain David Vitter, at least.
Only 63% of teens having sex used a condom? That’s frighteningly low. I’m going to hope that the other 37% at least used another form of birth control, or were having lesbian sex.
Now I don’t care a damn for conservatives, suburbanites, conservative suburbanites, religious people generally, anyone who has ever been to a “mega-church”, anyone who has ever looked at a “mega-church” and not felt a tiny bit nauseous, and the list is quite extensive, really. I especially don’t care about those people’s children, and I really especially don’t care who or what those people’s children are having pre-pubescent sex with.
BUT. I’m not entirely misanthropic, and I do think that STDs and unwanted pregnancy and all that jazz tend to make the early sex life even more painfully awkward than it is naturally predisposed to be, and certainly a hell of a lot less fun. So why not teach the brats to do it correctly?
I think we should counter, when accused of “wanting kids to have sex”, that yes, but conservatives want their kids to have bad sex, most likely to lower their expectations for when they have that blissfully romantic honeymoon where their appropriately-gendered-spouse fumbles around like a Boy Scout tying his first not as they explore all of the exciting and diverse ways that God’s intelligently designed bodies can have incredibly awkward and un-intelligent sex, missionary-with-the-man-on-top, thank you very much.
Oh, and what in the holy hell is a faith-based parent? Jesus H. Jones, I hope I never meet one.
Technically, I do want children to have sex, in the sense of “children” that Kevin is using it, which is “adult women who can make up their own damn minds”.
Hmmm… maybe you should both pee and have sex outdoors? Just not on the neighbor’s lawn…
Thank you for reviving my sense of humor. I’d read this idiocy on Clown Hall, and it was just one of those days when I couldn’t find the funny.
Going over to read the comments now that I can laugh again.
I eagerly await David Thompson’s ringing condemnation of wingnuts whining “but gay sex is UNNATURAL!!!11!!”
Perhaps if conservatives stop shunning porn and masturbation, then teens would be happy to abstain a few years until they are ready.
Oh, for the love of mustard! I just don’t GET these people!
I have an 8 year old. When he is ready to have sex, he will (’cause we ALL do), and I want him to do so. Why wouldn’t I ? That’s why I have started to, and will continue to articulate these core ideas:
1.Sex is natural
2.Sex has consequences
3.Sex is consentual- anything else is rape
4.Sex is only for people mature enough to prepare themselves and their partners for it, and to deal with the possible consequences.
We have all ready had the “masturbation is nothing to be ashamed of” talk, the “where babies come from” talk, the “most adults have and like sex” talk, the “no one has the right to touch you without your permission, and you don’t have the right to touch others without permission” talk, etc. As he gets older, I will start to talk about ways to ensure mutual consent and pleasure, and safe sex measures. When he hits puberty, we will take a trip to the drug store, and we will buy his first box of condoms together.
I mean, I could take the fundie approach, and just pretend sex doesn’t happen, and that by not talking about it, or shaming or threatening him about it, I’ll keep it from happening. Or let his “sex ed” come from TV and other clueless pubescent boys. I mean THAT makes total sense…
“Natural to pee on the floor”? It is to laugh. David, darling, this would presuppose that floors are natural. They are not. They are made by humans.
Good try. Better luck next time.
Not everybody.
And for the floor goons, change it to “ground”.
I don’t know, Intergalactic Hussy; it’s hard for me to think of a coherent ethical argument why porn would be better than sex. If having sex before you’re ready to make commitments is bad, then paying other people, by proxy, to have similarly uncommitted sex has to also be bad.
Masturbation’s another matter; it’s much easier for me to come up with a pro-masturbation anti-teen-sex argument than a pro-porn anti-teen-sex argument.
And, regardless, the argument that dramatic changes in condom usage among teens shouldn’t be reported as news at all is pretty weird.
CONSERVATIVES WANT YOUR CHILD TO DIE IN A MEANINGLESS WAR
and not everyone has heathcare, but im sure as hell that they would like some.
all this means is that 4% of americans cant get any.