I think vajayjay is a nice word, don’t you?

The New York Times on the history of the vajayjay.

It’s interesting that the term was thrown out on Grey’s Anatomy not only to be funny (although it was), but because “broadcast standards” folks didn’t like the repeated uses of the word “vagina”:

Shonda Rhimes, the creator and executive producer of “Grey’s Anatomy,” who brought the word into full public view, never intended to promote a euphemism or slang term for the female anatomy. Rather, she fought to use vagina in the script.

“I had written an episode during the second season of ‘Grey’s’ in which we used the word vagina a great many times (perhaps 11),” Ms. Rhimes wrote in an e-mail message. “Now, we’d once used the word penis 17 times in a single episode and no one blinked. But with vagina, the good folks at broadcast standards and practices blinked over and over and over. I think no one is comfortable experiencing the female anatomy out loud — which is a shame considering our anatomy is half the population.”

Which I think lends a lot of credence to the argument that we should just call human anatomy what it is (of course, what you’re staring at probably isn’t a vagina in the first place — it’s a vulva — but I suppose that’s beside the point).

Dr. Carol A. Livoti, a Manhattan obstetrician and gynecologist and an author of “Vaginas: An Owner’s Manual” (Thunder’s Mouth Press, 2004), said vajayjay and other euphemisms and slang offend her and can render women incapable of explaining their symptoms to health professionals. “I think it’s terrible,” Dr. Livoti said. “It’s time to start calling anatomical organs by their anatomical name. We should be proud of our bodies.”

“It seems like a step backward,” she added.

I agree with her on the first point — that we should call organs by their anatomical names — but I don’t think it’s a step backward. As the article points out, I do think there was a need for a popular word for vulva “that is not clinical, crude, coy, misogynistic or descriptive of a vagina from a man’s point of view.” Vajajay isn’t insulting; it isn’t trying to be mysterious; and at least it sounds a bit like “vagina,” unlike most of the other vag-related euphemisms. While it would be ideal if everyone would just get over the fear of using medically accurate terminology, as it stands, a lot of women are uncomfortable referring to their “vaginas,” but further uncomfortable using other popular terms for “vulva” (despite my love of Eve Ensler, I just can’t get on the “cunt” train). So I can see how most genital-related terminology feels alienating for a lot of women. Even I don’t like the term “vulva.” (Not because I have any problem with vulvas, but because “vulva” reminds me of “uvula,” a word — and a body part — I think is pretty gross and weird, but that’s neither here nor there). So I can’t take issue with the popularization of a term many women feel comfortable with. And hey, it’s got Oprah talking about her vajayay on air — can’t complain about that.

As Joel McHale, the host of “The Soup,” put it: “It’s not derogatory. It’s not ‘You’re being such a vajayjay right now.’ It’s kind of a sweet thing.”

“Vajayjay,” he said, “is like your good buddy.”

And it is a good, good buddy.

Personally, I find sexual euphemisms hilarious. My favorite vag-related one is “giney-town” (“giney” has a j-sound at the beginning). And, obviously, I love “Jill-ing off” as a reference to female masturbation.

What are your favorite euphemisms for genitalia and sexual activity? And am I the only one who still refers to sex as “boning”?

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117 comments for “I think vajayjay is a nice word, don’t you?

  1. Bruce from Missouri
    October 29, 2007 at 8:15 pm

    Shonda Rhimes has also given us “Ladytown”, and a southern woman referring to it as “My Good Girl”.

    Although when it get’s right down to it, you can use almost any work to describe vagina, penis, or breasts…It’s all in the context.

  2. humanadverb
    October 29, 2007 at 8:20 pm

    The thing about euphemisms for sex and sexual organs is that they are usually pretty easy to grasp in context, especially since we have a cultural predilection to euphemize THOSE words more than others. “My wonkey-tonk is itchy” is going to mean one thing or another, depending one what one expects “my” genitalia to be.

    It can be fun, so why shouldn’t it?

    Being ashamed to use the more accurate, more descriptive clinical words, or the cultural expectations that those words should be censored, is clearly another ball of wax. Whether Oprah is having fun or censoring herself (/being pressured to do so), I don’t know.

    But as far as my good pal Wally Fitz is concerned, I’m having fun.

  3. dingbat
    October 29, 2007 at 8:23 pm

    I refer to my gynecologist as either “my gynecologist” or “my lady doctor,” depending on how light the story is, and the effect want from it; I similarly call it “my [specific part here–clit, vagina, etc.]” or “my lady parts” depending on the circumstance. Audience is very important as to deciding on specificity.

  4. October 29, 2007 at 9:00 pm

    I personally like and use the shortened “vag”. Twat is also fun.

  5. JW
    October 29, 2007 at 9:05 pm

    I spell it “vadge.” It’s a name, like Madge! I also think “cooter” is funny/silly. Others: bits (good for anyone’s parts), bunny, crumpet, flaps (heard that from an Aussie actress), noo-noo (pee-pee is the male counterpart), quim, snatch… I love words for girl genitals; they’re friendlier than boy-part names.

  6. Meghan
    October 29, 2007 at 9:15 pm

    I enjoy cooter from time to time. I embrace hooha as well. A friend of mine has a daughter who used to call it her bagina, which occasionally works its way into my lexicon.

  7. INotI
    October 29, 2007 at 9:16 pm

    I like the word “vajeener”. It adds a nice old-timey prospector twang to the whole thing.

  8. October 29, 2007 at 9:18 pm

    Ever since reading Cunt, it’s the only word I use.

  9. October 29, 2007 at 9:19 pm

    Well, that’s not true — I use the clinical terms when appropriate.

  10. October 29, 2007 at 9:23 pm

    I don’t know. I think Vulva is actually a very attractive word.

    I always thought “nethers” was pretty funny though. It makes me think of squid tentacles.

  11. randomliberal
    October 29, 2007 at 9:55 pm

    No, you’re not the only person who still calls it “boning”. My personal favorite is “boinking”. Having a roll in ze hay is also good, as is bumping uglies.

  12. Bruce from Missouri
    October 29, 2007 at 9:57 pm

    Can’t forget Kristin Chenowith teaching Ellen Degeneres to sing:
    “Remember to breathe from your hoo-hoo, feel from within your hoo-hah”.

  13. Dillon
    October 29, 2007 at 10:04 pm

    I live in the city of Regina, sometimes referred to as “the Vag”

  14. Kai
    October 29, 2007 at 10:04 pm

    Probably my least favourite slang for the vagina is “cooch.” It just sounds so damn redneck (or maybe I’m just sick of hearing my sister say it for shock value, since it seems to be one of her favourite words). However, the funniest euphemism I have ever heard was when that same sister, who was still just a toddler at the time, turned to our mother in a shopping mall and said “Mommy, my china hurts.” To this day, no one has any idea where she heard this word, but it still cracks the whole family up.

    I think it’s kind of sad that we don’t have a nice, neutral slang term for lady bits that isn’t laden with offensive meanings or just totally ridiculous sounding. “Dick” can be an insult, but when a guy talks about his dick, it’s exactly the same as if he were saying “my penis.” We need a cool word like that, which sounds totally casual in conversation and doesn’t also carry any “sex” meanings (as pussy and cunt kind of do – they’re more like cock than dick). I like hoohay, but it’s not exactly a word I’d want to use to my gyno. Same with vajayjay – it may be popular, but I feel like it’s the female equivalent of “weewee” and it just doesn’t have the same, er, “maturity” that dick has.

  15. October 29, 2007 at 10:05 pm

    Jill, I never thought of her name that way before. I was laughing like mad when I read that. Actually, my blog title Pushing Rope is a sexual euphemism. It was also the name of an album by a defunct Tampa punk rock band.

    The sexual euphemism I hate the most is cornholing. It’s crude. From a food perspective, it kills my appetite when I hear it.

  16. October 29, 2007 at 10:06 pm

    Let’s see what will happens to vajayjay.

    Right now, though, I won’t look at any vajayjays.

  17. JenLovesPonies
    October 29, 2007 at 10:11 pm

    I hate the term “vajayjay”. I think it is a step backwards- it doesn’t sound like something that anyone could take seriously. Why don’t we use the term “pee-pee” for penis after kidnergarden? Because it sounds stupid and childish and is not something anyone could say with a straight face. Vajayjay has that same stupid, childish sound. I hate it even more than the word “moist”.

  18. October 29, 2007 at 10:30 pm

    Hmm how interesting – at my household we incorrectly use the word vagina (for vulva) when insisting that the three and a half year old learns to clean herself after the toilet i.e. “did you wipe your vagina and your botty?”

    Other than that, it’s “nether regions” for either male or female. And having sexual intercourse is “nooky”.

  19. October 29, 2007 at 10:43 pm

    I love the word “cooter” — and I don’t know why. A friend once referred to a pap smear as a “cooter poking” — I think it sounds cute and tough at the same time.

  20. October 29, 2007 at 10:45 pm

    there’s koochie, my chocolate, and my Gina (ja-eye-na)

  21. October 29, 2007 at 10:45 pm

    This should be the new blog tag line.

    Putting the Jill-ing in Feministe.

  22. willa
    October 29, 2007 at 10:49 pm

    I don’t know why, but I really like the word “vajayjay.” It’s very friendly and accessible. It kind of removes all of the dirty or embarrassing connotations of all kinds of euphemisms for the vagina/vulva, and I like that. Like, I can’t see a man getting drunk with his buddies and saying, “Man, look at that hot bitch! I wanna fuck her up her vajayjay!”

    …I feel gross just writing that.

  23. willa
    October 29, 2007 at 10:53 pm

    From the original post, this really bothers me:

    “I had written an episode during the second season of ‘Grey’s’ in which we used the word vagina a great many times (perhaps 11),” Ms. Rhimes wrote in an e-mail message. “Now, we’d once used the word penis 17 times in a single episode and no one blinked. But with vagina, the good folks at broadcast standards and practices blinked over and over and over. I think no one is comfortable experiencing the female anatomy out loud — which is a shame considering our anatomy is half the population.”

    How on earth can anyone see this phenomenon as ANYTHING other than sexism in the media? I mean…. I’m having trouble articulating this right now, so maybe someone else can tackle this. But this is just so blatant!!! How can anyone get away with this? Ugh.

  24. October 29, 2007 at 10:55 pm

    definitely not the only one who still calls it boning…


  25. October 29, 2007 at 10:56 pm

    vajayjay has b/c my new favorite term for it. if we can’t have fun w/ our own anatomy, who can?

  26. Ledasmom
    October 29, 2007 at 11:00 pm

    I’ve seen the term “my Area 51” used, which cracks me up. I mean, there could be aliens up there. Not as if I’d be able to see ’em.

  27. Hector B.
    October 29, 2007 at 11:06 pm

    When my sister was in a silly mood, she would make reference to “down there.”

  28. October 29, 2007 at 11:11 pm

    I do like Vajayjay, but I see the point and agree

    An even smaller point…aren’t they playing DOCTORS? I would *not* want my doctor to call it “vajayjay”!!

  29. Marissa
    October 29, 2007 at 11:22 pm

    I don’t think I could bring myself to say “vajayjay.”

  30. randomliberal
    October 29, 2007 at 11:24 pm

    Adding to my previous comment…i’m not a woman, so this probably isn’t really my call, but i’m with JenLovesPonies: I hate the term vajayjay. It sounds to me like something a kindergartner would say.

  31. October 29, 2007 at 11:34 pm

    I can’t stand vajayjay, because of the kindergarten reflex, but then again, I’m a man with no real authority on the issue. “Vajayjay” is also much harder to pull off if you’re white, I think, which is an interesting little intersection of its own.

    I use vagina. Or pussy if I’m with company that will understand I use it in a sex-positive way. Usually I have conversations about vaginas with that kind of company, though, so it’s not a problem.

    I actually wish I used cunt and twat more, because I think they could stand to get more usage from people who aren’t being assholes.

    The British euphemisms for sex parts are just hilarious, though. I can’t possibly be the only Georgia Nicholson fan in the room, can I?

    Dan Savage proposed on his podcast a few weeks back that we use “scrotum” instead of “pussy” to mean weak. The reasoning is that pussies take a pounding during sex and spit out babies; scrotums only take a good flick before sending their owners to the floor.

  32. Bruce from Missouri
    October 29, 2007 at 11:36 pm

    An even smaller point…aren’t they playing DOCTORS? I would *not* want my doctor to call it “vajayjay”!!

    Well, you have to remember, she didn’t say it to a patient, she said it to one of her interns who was helping her with her birth as he was looking up there and enthusing about how well she was doing…”George! Stop looking at my Vajayjay!”

  33. October 29, 2007 at 11:45 pm

    Personally, I strongly dislike the “childish” slang terms for vagina. It feels infantalizing to me.

    I like just “vag” for myself. I wish I could be on the “cunt” train, but it still just sounds like an insult word to me…like “douche” or “dick”…dunno why.

  34. kate
    October 29, 2007 at 11:48 pm

    I too find it disconcerting that a show that depicts doctors refuses to allow the doc characters to use anatomically correct verbiage only when referring to women’s genitalia. If I had a doctor that couldn’t refer to my body by its correct names, I’d be awfully suspicious of his/her abilities to do anything else concerning my body.

    Its different though when in casual company, when not in a professional capacity. I actually use the term ‘screw’ or ‘fuck’ because frankly, I like a good screwing and when I’m horny I want to fuck like a mad woman. When in the throes of passion, using childish sounding references just doesn’t come to mind.

    My ex couldn’t use proper or ‘nasty’ terminology when speaking of sexual functions or genitalia, needless to say he was a drag in the sack.

    That being said, I am conservative with my kids (who are adults now) and have been known to say ‘hoo-ha’ around them, usually joking, which they quite get and my faux conservative always gets a good laugh, knowing how I really am.

  35. exholt
    October 29, 2007 at 11:56 pm

    As a dude, I have no comment on vajayjay.

    On “boning”..heard it commonly used. It usually prompts a chuckle from me though as it conjures up mental images of skeletons rubbing, ramming, and otherwise enjoying their sexuality.

    And Halloween is coming right up. What a coincidence! :D

  36. little bird
    October 30, 2007 at 12:09 am

    Dan Savage proposed on his podcast a few weeks back that we use “scrotum” instead of “pussy” to mean weak. The reasoning is that pussies take a pounding during sex and spit out babies; scrotums only take a good flick before sending their owners to the floor.

    This somewhat reminds me of a piece that Bitch (Capital B) does at her concerts, where she reclaims the word “pussy” as something positive, basicly using it as a synonym for “awsome”. Like, “Wow what a great audiance tonight, you guys are so pussy!!”

    She also calls men “scrotum toters” which I think is quite possibley the most fun thing to say ever.

  37. NBarnes
    October 30, 2007 at 12:31 am

    ‘nookie’ is my preferred light sexual euphemism.

    I am still fond of STella’s formulation, ‘wabbly bits’. ‘boy/girl parts’ is also good. I am a huge fan of ‘cunt’, but as a boy, I feel that I’m not allowed to use it except privately with consenting partners.

  38. Linnaeus
    October 30, 2007 at 12:39 am

    When referring to sex, I just say “fuck”. I usually don’t have to worry about offending anyone, because when the topic of sex comes up, I’m usually in a crowd of people who say the same thing. If I’m not in such a crowd, then I’m probably in a more professional setting in which “sex” suffices.

  39. October 30, 2007 at 12:45 am

    Peens & ‘gines, peens & ‘gines!

    “How’s your ‘gine doing today?” asks the gynocologist.
    “My ‘gine’s just fine! Thanks for askin’!”

  40. Ashley
    October 30, 2007 at 12:52 am

    I’m a big fan of the word “boinking” and tend to prefer it to any other word for sex. It’s silly, light hearted, and has no sense of violence in it (like pounding, getting laid, screwing, even boning can.) Plus, “boink” is bouncy. Also, I’ve never had anyone confused by the word “boink”

  41. Ashley
    October 30, 2007 at 12:57 am

    Oh, and for female specific anatomy, I prefer “girly bits” and “girly hormones” “Womany” just doesn’t sound right to me.

  42. October 30, 2007 at 1:50 am

    I like “vajayjay.” It sounds more teenager than kindergartener to me. I also like the fact that it’s a word that women came up with and so doesn’t have the same kind of misogynist baggage that “pussy” and “cunt” have.

    We should have fun words for our ladyparts anyway. Insisting that we must always call it by its proper Latin name no matter the circumstances is ridiculously school-marmish. Saying “vagina” with your doctor — yes. Over cocktails with your friends — no.

  43. Jess
    October 30, 2007 at 3:59 am

    I’m particularly fond of the word “cooch”, especially since there’s a street in Portland pronounced “cooch” (and spelled “couch”). Failing that, “crotch” works well for most of my uses.

    When I was little, I pronounced “vagina” “gina”, scandalizing my grandmother.

  44. evil fizz
    October 30, 2007 at 8:34 am

    There was a PA or a nurse in my doctor’s office once who called it “down south” which I still use.

    I’m still torn. Vajayjay sounds weird coming out my mouth and I don’t like any of the other alternatives. Clearly, I’ve have to wait for the next mediocre dramedy to give me a suggestion. =)

  45. October 30, 2007 at 9:06 am

    God you guys, it’s JANERS. JANE-ERS. Janers. Also, boning = pretty sweet, though I also like jump, but you can’t use it like, then we jumped. It has to be like, omg Paul Rudd, I want to jump you.

  46. Katherine
    October 30, 2007 at 9:09 am

    Brit here – I like the word “shagging” for sex. Like “boinking” it’s fun and light and, as Ashley said above, has no sense of violence.

    For female genitalia, “bits” or “vag” are the words I’d use. Vulva sounds overly clinical for normal useage, though I wouldn’t be uncomfortable using it in a clinical situation.

    “Vajayjay” just sounds weird. I can’t even work out how it’s supposed to be pronounced. Maybe that’s an accent/geographical thing though.

  47. MS
    October 30, 2007 at 9:16 am

    I CANNOT stop laughing over “my Area 51”!! Ha ha!! That is the funniest thing I’ve heard in a while! :-D

    I was really pissed off by the broadcast [double] standards regarding using “vagina.” If “penis” isn’t a problem, then they are basically coming out and saying, “women’s body parts are scary/shameful.” And THAT ATTITUDE is scary and shameful.

  48. Rhiannon
    October 30, 2007 at 9:20 am

    “vulva” reminds me of “uvula,”

    Hmm… it reminds me of the word Vulcan, so it’s never really bothered me.

    I don’t really have an opinion on the use of “vajayjay” as a term to describe one’s genitals as a whole. I won’t be using it most likely, but I don’t see anything “wrong” with it either.

  49. October 30, 2007 at 9:22 am

    SHE-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named ;o)

  50. October 30, 2007 at 9:45 am

    On the episode of Grey’s in question, I think it was a rare case of vagina being as correct as vulva, since she was giving birth and all.

    I like vulva. I don’t like vagina and only use it when it is exactly correct and needed. I like pussy, since it is fur-covered and loves to be petted. I had a friend who called it foo-foo (and foo-foo turned out to be a gender-neutral term, which cracked my shit up). And I’ve enjoyed hearing ladyparts in recent years. I like privates, since hello, they ARE, and I like the way privates, as a euphemism, sort of teaches a kid about privacy in a non-didactic way.

  51. October 30, 2007 at 9:50 am

    I can’t stop laughing at “Area 51” either. I sometimes use the word “tweeter” when being silly. Or “girl parts.”

    My first name, which I rarely use, is Regina. Which is frequently mispronounced to sound like vagina, especially whenever it’s announced loudly in a waiting room, for example. Call me Nora, please.

    I had a gynecologist, briefly, when I first moved here. I’d been in once and seen the nurse practitioner for some itchiness, etc. and had been treated for a yeast infection. When I returned to see the doc – whom I had not previously met – a few weeks later, he read my chart, and asked me how was my “bottom,” blushing furiously as he asked. I struggled not to laugh, and not to say “my ass is doing fine thanks. And the vaginal suppositories cleared up the yeast infection in my vagina as well. Vagina Vagina Vagina — say it with me, doc.” I mean, the poor dear, a freaking gynecologist and he can’t say “vagina?” I sure as hell didn’t want to show him mine.

    I got a different gynecologist shortly after that, when someone in his office (not him) responded to my rather urgent inquiries about EC by waiting more than 72 hours to call back, and then telling me there was no such thing on the market. Which, I’d already called Planned Parenthood and gotten what I needed, thanks. Plus a referral to a much better GYN practice, where they can talk about vaginas all day if they have to, and they recommend that you keep EC handy if you think you might be needing it.

  52. Nicki
    October 30, 2007 at 9:55 am

    I don’t particularly like vajayjay. It has too many syllables. I prefer snatch or cootch in a conversational setting, and sometimes cunt during sex. Actually I really like the word cunt, I just hate the negative connotations and so I don’t use it outside the bedroom.

  53. October 30, 2007 at 10:11 am

    I’ve only heard vajayjay used once and that was in a dog grooming class. I don’t use it because it’s not familiar. But I have no problem with the word whatsoever.

  54. TinaH
    October 30, 2007 at 10:15 am

    When the hubby and I being cute, I have a “squinky.” When I’m talking to the 4 year old, he has a “penis.” He’s not yet noticed that I have something different in my pants than he does. When he does, it’ll be a “vulva.” Boring as watching paint dry, I know.

    Best euphemism for sex? “Slammin’ the ol’ screen door.” Cracks me up.

  55. Thomas, TSID
    October 30, 2007 at 10:17 am

    NBarnes, am I missing something, or did you just make a fifteen year old obscure Usenet reference?

    I lean on the anatomicals, because I have small children and I want them to be as matter-of-fact about their genitals as possible. I generally reference “private parts” for the whole area, because privacy is an important concept when teaching toddlers not to pee on the front lawn, but I call a penis a penis and a vulva a vulva.

    With my spouse, I use “pussy” because that’s her preference. But a clit is a clit and labia are labia.

    I do use a lot of euphemisms for sex, boning among them. But I find I use them very indistinctly; as in, without regard to whether there is penetration or who is penetrating whom.

    I love “jilling off,” though it’s not as evocative as “rowing the man in the little boat.” Though why one would analogize a clitoris to a man is beyond me. One syllable works better than two there, but “girl” is probably better than “man”.

  56. helen g
    October 30, 2007 at 10:18 am

    I’m more than happy with calling my vagina ‘my vagina’.

    ‘Ladybits’ is quite an amusing name, though…

  57. Daomadan
    October 30, 2007 at 10:31 am

    I dislike the entire “vajayjay” phenomenon. What is between my legs is a vulva, vagina, or cunt. I love the v-sounds of vulva and vagina and the hard c-sound of cunt. After reading “Cunt” from the Vagina Monologues it has always been a powerful word for me.

    Vajayjay sounds immature while vulva, vagina, and even cunt have a maturity to them. There is nothing hidden by those words.

  58. SKM
    October 30, 2007 at 10:44 am

    I cannot bear cutesy terms like “vajayjay”. I am a grown woman; I have no coochie, no chee-chee, no cooter, no hoo-ha. I do, however, have a cunt–and a lovely one at that. Pussy also does fine, but just for genitalia, not for wimps.

    In practice, though, my partner’s native language is Spanish and I know it’s important to him to make love in his own language, so we usually say “coño”, or the even more affectionate diminutive form “coñito”. Coño comes from the same root as cunt I think (any info on its etymology is welcome) and is also used as a curse word, but more as an intensifier than an insult.

    We tend to refer to sex as “malos hechos” (“wicked deeds”), in a playful and affectionate way.

  59. October 30, 2007 at 10:45 am

    ‘Quim’ is my favourite I think. Or possibly ‘cunt’ in the right context.

  60. Em
    October 30, 2007 at 10:48 am



    Whoever said that, I kinda like it.

  61. whatwoulddustydo?
    October 30, 2007 at 10:52 am

    Willies and fannies in my household. My biggest problem with vagina is that it comes from Latin, where it means “sheath for a sword.” Eew.

  62. October 30, 2007 at 11:13 am

    My biggest problem with vagina is that it comes from Latin, where it means “sheath for a sword.” Eew.

    So does the word “vanilla.” When the Spanish came to the Americas, they saw the vanilla bean and thought that the pod looked like a vagina. It got slightly disorted on the trip into English, but that’s the derivation.

  63. October 30, 2007 at 11:37 am

    I am a guy and I commented on “vajayjay”. I think that straight guys have an obligation to comment about “vajayjay”.

    Speaking of the word, I explain why many people like and don’t like this word on my blog.

  64. sirriamnis
    October 30, 2007 at 11:39 am

    In response to Alphabitch’s comment: HOLY FUCK!!! Did your insurance have you seeing that Hagar guy Bush tried to appoint?

    Slang terms in our house depend largely on my mood and the company. I’m big on Cunt. I refuse to say vajayjay. And I’m not particularly fond of Twat or Pussy. I had an ex who used to refer to it as a “gash.” There’s a reason he’s an ex.

    For sex, our tamest euphemism is “Alone time.” “Alone time” is what we have when we lock all the cats out of the bedroom. Why we feel the need to use a euphimism for sex when speaking to the cats, I do not know.

    Other than that it’s mostly just “fucking,” “sexing,” “having teh SEXX0RZ,” “murdering angels,” or “shagging.”

  65. Thomas, TSID
    October 30, 2007 at 11:55 am

    I’m in Mod Queue forever. NBarnes, did I miss something or did you make a really obscure fifteen year old Usenet reference?

  66. October 30, 2007 at 12:00 pm

    I agree with those who think vajayjay sounds like a kindergartener’s word.

    But I’m also one of those people who doesn’t see why we need euphemisms for vulvas, breasts, and penises anyway. Do you have a favorite euphemism for “foot”? How about “arm”? Do you have some special term for your knees you use when talking casually, while saving “knee” for the doctor’s office?

    Calling your body parts by some other name just adds to the idea that they shouldn’t be called by their real names in public, as far as I’m concerned. Guys talking about their dicks sound like they’ve failed to grow out of high school. Same with girls talking about their cunts, or whatever current slang is. And the people I’ve actually met in person who call their genitals by cutesy or slang terms are the ones who are most startled to hear someone say “penis” or “vulva”.

  67. Hector B.
    October 30, 2007 at 12:00 pm

    I forgot about Vagina, Saskatchewan, because I grew up saying Ruh-GEE-na.

    Re: repetition: Penis sounds soft and gentle, while vagina sounds harsh and jarring. Perhaps the repetition of vagina was simply more noticeable. Plus penis sounds like a fancy way to say “piano-player.”

  68. Hector B.
    October 30, 2007 at 12:04 pm

    Why we need euphemisms for vulvas, breasts, and penises anyway. Do you have a favorite euphemism for “foot”? How about “arm”?

    Foot, arm, and breast are all good old anglo-saxon words. Penis and vagina are latin imports, because the anglo-saxon terms are too direct to say in polite company. Penis is a double euphemism, meaning the tail that hangs in front.

  69. Daomadan
    October 30, 2007 at 12:05 pm

    “And am I the only one who still refers to sex as ‘boning’?”

    I sure don’t call it that when I’m with a woman. Though, I don’t call it that when I’m with a man either. I prefer “fucking” or “Let’s go dancing.” :) “Let’s go dancing” is my favorite because you can just say it across the dinner table.

  70. Danielle
    October 30, 2007 at 12:22 pm

    I personally am a fan of the word “bajingo” to describe my girlie parts. Fun, silly, and unless there’s another Scrubs watcher in the room, a great way to talk about it without people knowing I’m talking about it (not that I’m typically shy about it — I have been known to bring up my cervix at dinner parties. No, really).

    As for sex, my favorite euphamism is “scrumping”. Has just the right “rrump” sound in it.

  71. Karna
    October 30, 2007 at 12:48 pm

    I also love the term boinking, and the best term I have ever heard for sex is “magical horizontal bop”(this actually from a school english teacher. it did amuse me, though). and while I agree that vajayjay sounds childish, I also really don’t like cunt(been used as too many insults) and so many problems. I’m getting more and more okay with the term pussy, if for no other reason after reading the phrase “it’s always seemed a fitting term for something that purrs when properly stroked”. but I can’t really shake the fear that any term for women’s genitals is going to get a derogatory tone even if it didn’t start with one. maybe we need to rotate every couple of years? but that would be a lot of work

  72. Mnemosyne
    October 30, 2007 at 12:56 pm

    But I’m also one of those people who doesn’t see why we need euphemisms for vulvas, breasts, and penises anyway.

    A lot of our body parts have euphemisms, not just our genitals. Should we ban “tummy” next? Is “belly” the enemy now? How about “noggin” — is that acceptable, or must everyone refer to “head” in every reference?

    Do you have a favorite euphemism for “foot”? How about “arm”?

    You’ve never heard the word “tootsies” used to refer to feet? There’s even a shoe company that uses it in their name.

    Plus, referring to one’s “vagina” when you’re actually talking about your vulva or your clitoris isn’t accurate, either, so insisting that we must all use that word when referring to any of the parts down there is no more accurate than referring to them as our vajayjay.

  73. Christina
    October 30, 2007 at 1:06 pm

    My personal favorite for Vagina is “Hoot ‘n Holler”
    It’s fun, and I can’t get on the Cunt train either, so it works. But I’m not afraid to use the straight up medical terms, and often.

    For sex? I like “Porking” it gives a good visual.

    I have been know to say things ridiculous as well. I once screamed at my husband from downstairs, “I’m getting RANDY in my LADY business, where ARE YOU?”
    It got the job done, but I still haven’t lived it down.

  74. October 30, 2007 at 1:14 pm

    YES Em. Get on the JANERS TRAIN! We’re taking this thing all the way. Also, I totally forgot about rogering! Roger! So good!

    Also in re. why the euphemisms, I mean, it’s not an embarrassment thing for me – believe me, anyone I would feel weird talking to about my vagina/vulva/whatevs I would feel even weirder talking to about my “janers.”

    I just like a bit of silliness in my rogering, some way of talking about things that is not all sciency or granolay or porny or anything, just sort of goofy and affectionate.

    And I am all for words that make people feel goofy and affectionate towards their janers and their partners’ janers and janers worldwide.

  75. October 30, 2007 at 1:14 pm

    Foot, arm, and breast are all good old anglo-saxon words. Penis and vagina are latin imports, because the anglo-saxon terms are too direct to say in polite company. Penis is a double euphemism, meaning the tail that hangs in front.

    And I would argue that by the time a word has become the official word in a language for a body part, it’s no longer a euphemism, even though it started that way.

    By this point in the English language, “penis” is not a euphemism. Neither is “vulva”.

    A lot of our body parts have euphemisms, not just our genitals. Should we ban “tummy” next? Is “belly” the enemy now? How about “noggin” — is that acceptable, or must everyone refer to “head” in every reference? […] You’ve never heard the word “tootsies” used to refer to feet?

    I only ever hear children or really immature people use those words frequently; occasionally, someone more mature uses them to be silly. Frankly, yes, they are annoying and childish. They bring to mind someone being cutesy, or stuck at the emotional age of three.

    Sorry. Nothing drives me nuts faster than hearing a grown adult talk about how his tummy’s full, or how she painted her tootsies yesterday. It. Drives. Me. Fucking. Nuts.

    And yet somehow, at least among the people I interact with, using slang terms for stomach and toes and head is seen as childish, but the same is not true for genitals or breasts. There’s still a prudishness there. I don’t have to say “tummy” when talking about my stomach in public, and will be looked at askance if I do. It’s considered shocking to use anything other than slang when talking about penises or vulvas or breasts.

    Plus, referring to one’s “vagina” when you’re actually talking about your vulva or your clitoris isn’t accurate, either, so insisting that we must all use that word when referring to any of the parts down there is no more accurate than referring to them as our vajayjay.

    I think you’ll note I said “vulva”. Try paying attention to the words I actually use.

  76. S
    October 30, 2007 at 1:48 pm

    I have no real personal objection to vajayjay. Don’t use it much myself, but the usage by others doesn’t bother me.

    As for sex? Depends. I must admit, when I talk about “intercourse” with someone I care about, I am one of those few outside of romance novels who will use the phrase “making love”. Outside of a monogomous- not a value judgement here, just how I roll- caring relationship, I call it whatever fits. Sometimes, fucking is what you need, and to call it anything else is a lie.

    …I do love the phrase “knockin’ boots”. It makes me smile.

  77. October 30, 2007 at 2:10 pm

    I was going to respond here, but it got a bit longer than comment length.

    I will say, however, that my favorite euphemism for sex is “bangity bangity,” or sometimes “the bangity bangity.” The best part of saying this phrase is that you can just keep saying it over and over.

    Bangity bangity bangity bangity… ad infinitum and/or tired girly bits.

  78. Andrea
    October 30, 2007 at 2:13 pm

    Favorite euphemism for vagina: peesh (as heard on Kathy Griffin’s stand-up special Everyone Can Suck It)

    Favorite euphemism for sex: playing hide the sausage

  79. meggygurl
    October 30, 2007 at 2:47 pm

    I have been know to say things ridiculous as well. I once screamed at my husband from downstairs, “I’m getting RANDY in my LADY business, where ARE YOU?”
    It got the job done, but I still haven’t lived it down.

    This made me giggle really hard, and I’m at work!

    I use the words: vagina, down there, happy place, vajajay, pussy, cunt, girly parts, crotch… aaaaand a variety of things i won’t say when refering to my girlfriend’s. I plan on teaching my kids the medical terms, because I don’t want them to be ashamed of any body parts.

    And I like to call sex: extreme snuggling, fucking (usually in reference to “please fuck me now”), shagging, scoring, bonking, screwing, “to get some,” and getting laid.

    But I am pretty crude… and most of those I only say in front of the GF or close friends. Not that I’m ashamed, I just don’t want to say “me and my girlfriend were screwing last night.” Though, I do like to use the word fucking, cause then I get to explain how yes, lesbians CAN fuck. With no dildo to boot!

  80. Karen
    October 30, 2007 at 3:15 pm

    Context is everything. With my doctor, it’s purely clinical terms. Actually, the hardest thing I’ve ever had to describe was hemorroids. I had gone to this doctor through two pregnancies and a nasty yeast infection. I could say “vaginal discharge” all day long but somehow “rectum” was just beyond me. Oh, and I have to report that this gyno’s name was “Casanova.” He was wonderful, and being able to laugh about doctor visits made the whole process more pleasant.

    On the actual subject, I can’t stand “cunt;” it has too much of an insulting history. “Vajayjay” was created by a woman for female character to use and just seems more friendly to me. (Also, I can totally see even a doctor resorting to less clinical terms while giving birth. Contractions are not a time to worry about using slang.) I have to say that as of today I’m adopting “Area 51” though. It’s funny and I can work in “X-files” references.

  81. Sabrina
    October 30, 2007 at 3:15 pm

    vagina euphemism: lady bits!

    there was a girl in residence in first year university who referred to her vagina as her “va-joo”, and that always made me giggle.

    sex euphemism: boning and shagging.

  82. Sabrina
    October 30, 2007 at 3:17 pm

    aw crap, i forgot my favourite term for having an orgasm though.

    “getting my jollies” – it works for masturbation AND partnered sex.

    love it. “yeah, i got my jollies, i might see him again.”
    “i have the apartment to myself, getting my jollies tonight.”

  83. madeline
    October 30, 2007 at 3:34 pm

    my old roommate called vaginas “muppet mouths.” to this day i can’t even type it without laughing.

    my husband refers to sex as “canoodling,” which also cracks me up…but muppet mouth? funniest mental image ever.

  84. Meghan
    October 30, 2007 at 3:34 pm

    I don’t usually use euphemisms for my lady bits when speaking because I feel like I sound ridiculous, it’s all “clit” and “vaginal canal” and “lips” cause I feel like there’s less chance of confusion compared to “down there”. Also I got much of my education out of books where Vajajay isn’t exactly what’ll be printed. I really dislike “box” tho. as for sex, depending on audience and how I’m feeling it’s “fuck” or “jump”, although I agree on the cuteness of “boink”.

    Oy, now I’m missing all the fun parts about partnered sex, where you make up silly stuff together.

  85. meggygurl
    October 30, 2007 at 3:52 pm

    Oh yeah, I forgot. My soon to be in-laws’ if my marriage were legal and or binding’ call sex rumping. Which makes me giggle. They really like to use it in reference to Grandpa, who has been dating around lately. They like to say he’s “rumpin’!” again!

  86. sirriamnis
    October 30, 2007 at 4:04 pm

    Christina said: I have been know to say things ridiculous as well. I once screamed at my husband from downstairs, “I’m getting RANDY in my LADY business, where ARE YOU?”
    It got the job done, but I still haven’t lived it down.

    Oh, ow! Laughing so hard!!!!

    Sort of like the day I walked in after work, to find my husband on the couch and said, “You. Bedroom. Naked. Now.”
    His comment was, “Where’s the romance?”

    And then my Lady Parts got Randy all over him.

    I’m going to be chuckling over this for days.

  87. October 30, 2007 at 4:28 pm

    My husband and I both love language and euphemisms and tend to use as many as possible. While fucking, it’s usually “fucking” or “making love” depending on the mood, but when talking about it it’s other fun things, like “discussing Uganda” or “doing the horizontal mambo” or “making the beast with two backs” or something. I actually have fun being very literal, like “I like it when you put your penis inside my vagina and move it in and out and around and stuff.”

    As far as parts, it’s “cock” and “cunt” or “penis” and “pussy” during sex, while outside of sex it’s “nether region,” “koochie snorcher,” or whatever sounds silliest and most fun at the time.

    Part of my husband’s and my initial courtship was a long string of e-mails while we were in different cities, the subject of each of which was a euphemism for masturbation. “Grooming the komodo dragon” emerged the clear favourite.

  88. October 30, 2007 at 4:29 pm

    And I find it hilarious that my above comment did not end up in moderation (while this one, of course, will).

  89. TinaH
    October 30, 2007 at 4:40 pm

    Dan Savage proposed on his podcast a few weeks back that we use “scrotum” instead of “pussy” to mean weak. The reasoning is that pussies take a pounding during sex and spit out babies; scrotums only take a good flick before sending their owners to the floor.

    This has me on the floor with tears in my eyes – hucking filarious!

  90. October 30, 2007 at 5:31 pm

    Dr. Confused, you are not alone.

  91. October 30, 2007 at 5:41 pm

    Favourite euphemisms:

    Vagina: my little sister when she was small, couldn’t pronounce the word, and it ended up being her “china”. I also like just as word anyway, “gynie” to rhyme with “heinie” (which also seems to make the term much more about it being a woman’s bits rather than the Latin derivation of vagina). But generally I go with the old English “cunt”, which I think can be said with such relish, it’s a word that I enjoy.

    Penis: About the only word that feels right for talking about the penis in sexual terms is “cock”. All the other slang terms seem to me to be derogatory in that context (e.g. “prick” seems to be deliberately mocking the man’s penis as being too small). In non-sexual contexts I always use either “willy” or “penis” depending on the audience.

    Sex: I nearly always call it “fucking”, or if it’s anal sex then it’s “buggery” or “arsefucking”. Fellatio is very rarely a “blowjob”, it tends to be described either by what she does to me, or what I do to her, depending on the manner and context of the act. Cunnilingus has some very good ones, I found a passage in the Bible (it’s in Proverbs) about not committing adultery, and it says that “a man should drink from his own well”, which I immediately took as being advocating performing cunnilingus on his wife (there’s a similar passage in the Song of Solomon), so there’s “drink from her well”. But usually, I just talk about licking, tasting, etc her cunt.


    I share the concerns about a medical drama show not being able to use the word “vagina” in a medical context, especially if they have no problem using “penis”. It’s very clearly a form of “othering” and denying women the ability to talk about their own bodies properly.


    Euphemisms are great fun, that’s why we should have them. I like rich, colourful metaphor and simile and figurative speech, and that’s what euphemism can give us. Plus, the play-acting of , “ooh, how naughty!” can be lots of fun in itself!

  92. October 30, 2007 at 6:48 pm

    I’m fairly non-squeamish about it. I like “cunt”. “Pussy” tends to be the word I use more often, because “cunt” makes people flinch. I call sex “fucking”. Occasionally “screwing”, due to the fact that it’s a playful word in the right context. (“Let’s screw around” sounds fun and still more real than “mess” around.) Euphemisms are problematic, because they rarely stay euphemisms. They either become the word for the thing and then banned themselves, or they fade from usage because they don’t reference the thing itself directly enough. I don’t like them for that reason; they’re just unsatisfying words.

  93. Nicole
    October 30, 2007 at 6:50 pm

    I am still incredibly fond of “capuchin.” Like the monkey. I heard the word and the first thought out of my head was “YES. THAT is the new word I am using for my vagina.”

  94. Margaret
    October 30, 2007 at 7:38 pm

    I like “shagging” because it sounds playful and non-violent but vigorous at the same time. But I never actually use it because I think it sounds weird coming from an American.

  95. Ledasmom
    October 30, 2007 at 8:59 pm

    I love pretty much any of the more involved euphemistic phrases for sex: “dancing the mattress gavotte” and “ten toes up and ten toes down” are favorites of mine.
    It was quite a struggle at first saying “penis” and “scrotum” when it became necessary to refer to those parts when talking to the first son, because a) I am exceedingly immature when it comes to sexual references (as in, nearly brought my trivia team to a standstill after seeing another member’s drawing of Norway. However, I have proof that we are not in fact the least mature team at that trivia game, in that another team has, for months now, used the name “Astronauts in Diapers Headed for Uranus”) and b) I have this thing about completeness, such that I always had to add “which contains the testicles” to “scrotum”, by which point in the conversation Elder Son had lost track. In contexts in which brevity was an asset we just said “parts”, as in “wash your butt and your parts”. By the time Second Son came around it was not difficult to say the words.

  96. tiffany
    October 30, 2007 at 9:34 pm

    I agree with 10 and 17. I think vulva is a pretty word, vajaja makes me want to smack somebody. i also like bits, but quite frankly i use the technical terms. “Oh baby i looove it when you lick my labia that way” and “Oh Goddess! flick my clitoris like that again” don’t interfere with my sex play at all.

  97. Lorelei
    October 30, 2007 at 10:03 pm

    I call my vagina ‘My Decadence’ after a conversation at 3AM with my best friend while I was absolutely delirious.

    she will call hers ‘Ole Ginie’ (zhy-nee) because it makes it sound like a prospector and geyser at the same time.

    This same friend… in re: to childish words for the vagina. She babysat this girl whose mother insisted on talking in babytalk to her until she was like 10 years old. so when this kid was about 8, she fell on a bannister or some normal childhood accident that results in vaginal pain for children, and says, ‘MAMA, MY HOO-HOO HURTS.’

    i still think it’s the funniest thing, and i don’t know why.

  98. October 30, 2007 at 10:10 pm

    Well when I was growing up, I referred to it as my “papona”, it’s a funky spanish word someone must have came up with at some time or another.

  99. October 30, 2007 at 10:33 pm

    Me and the man started using Nether Regions at one point, for either sex, and then we thought it was funny to say Netherlands, and then we went further and ended up with Dutch Country. Which cracks us up every time, but no, is not helpful in a medical sense.

    I like vajayjay. It’s cute, which vagina will never be. I also like Ginny, squeezebox (as in “mama’s got a…”), muffin, and love thing. I do NOT like anything that refers to “flaps.” And even though I made it up in an attempt to find a new funny term, I’m not keen on Baloney Rose. Which my husband finds hilarious.

  100. JCLG
    October 30, 2007 at 10:41 pm

    If you actually saw the Grey’s episode where “vajayjay” was used, it was pretty hilarious! A male intern was in the room while his resident that he worked under was about to have a baby. She told him to “stop looking at [her] vajayjay”. As a Grey’s nut, I think it was funny because of the character that used it.

    Anyway, I usually refer to my vagina/vulva/clit/etc as my “parts”. At least in polite(ish) company.

    My boyfriend and I usually just call sex “doin’ it.” As in “Let’s go do it.”
    When talks about “going down” on me he calls it eating at Cafe Jessi…which cracks me up!

  101. October 30, 2007 at 11:09 pm

    I have now had direct contact with two mothers who taught their young daughters that their vagina is called a “girl butt.”

    A “GIRL BUTT.”


  102. October 30, 2007 at 11:47 pm

    I like to ask my boyfriend if he wants to “hit it.” That’s usually how I initiate, and always casually and in advance, as if I’m scheduling some time.

    One of my best friends from college used to call her ob/gyn her “gynomonster” and had a euphemism for her genitalia that I desperately wish I could remember now, but it totally escapes me.

    Mostly when I’m talking about my own I use feminine pronouns, like “she” and “her”, as if she’s a third party my man and I are discussing. Which she is. I think he finds this odd, but I like the company. :)

  103. lilcollegegirl
    October 30, 2007 at 11:52 pm

    Hmm, in casual speech I use vag, vajayjay and vulva for my vulva. For sex I usually say “sexxors”, or having sex, or just grab boy thing and drag him into the bedroom. I say penis for his penis, because I think it sounds like a Pokemon’s name, which makes me giggle. However, my name between he and I for my vagina/vulva is “Bitey.”

  104. October 31, 2007 at 12:30 am

    I have now had direct contact with two mothers who taught their young daughters that their vagina is called a “girl butt.”

    I’ve been told that in England, your “fanny” is not your ass. It’s your girl butt, so to speak.

  105. kate
    October 31, 2007 at 2:42 am

    After reading all these comments, I feel like I have to confess. For one, in the household I grew up in talk of or reference to sex was verboten, except for when my father flew into his periodic misoginyst rages, which then caused my brother and mostly me to hear the absolute worst words used in referencing women’s body parts and sexual functions.

    As a result, strong euphemisms for women’s body parts usually put me off quite a bit. If a man were to use such words as ‘cunt, pussy, bitch, whore, or whatever, in however playful or sexually stimulating context attempted, my immediate response was to lose interest in all sexual activity immediately. My current partner is far more understanding and refrains, just by his nature, from using terms that have a derogatory delineation to women’s sexuality.

    As a result as well, I have been known to use references to sexual activity that have a negative connotation when it suits to relieve my anger. Such as when I caught my ex-husband cheating (repeatedly), I often might have said something like, “I know that asshole is humping that bitch for all she’s worth.” which I know is pretty bad, but hey, I had no sympathy for a woman who screwed a married man with a dependent wife and little kids.

    I also have to refrain from making the reference “having sex with” when referring to pedophiliac behavior, which is common especially when people are talking about men abusing young girls. The ‘con‘ part of that phrase denies the lack thereof and that pisses me off immensely.

    And also, I might as well say this, I only ‘make love’ to a man I love. In my wilder days, I ‘had sex’ with men I didn’t necessarily love, but sure loved to fuck. I hate the rampant and wanton use of that word, it seems to dilute its meaning.

    And Tom and others mentioning the use of ‘private parts’ or ‘privates’ to kids as making clear the boundary distinction, I did the same. Might I also add that my fucked up repressed growing up made being correct a struggle no matter how much intellectually I knew better, I still had to work at it.

  106. exholt
    October 31, 2007 at 2:54 am

    I am a guy and I commented on “vajayjay”. I think that straight guys have an obligation to comment about “vajayjay”.


    Fine. :) I am in the camp that thinks it sounds a bit too childish. Then again, I still hear similarly childish descriptions of the penis like “wee-wee”, “willie”, among dudes at work and when hanging out.

    As for sex euphemisms, don’t really have a preference so long as there are no misunderstandings. However, the terms “boning” and “boinking” always conjure up silly images of amorous skeletons clacking with each other or zany cartoon characters bouncing around all over the place.

    Not to say there is anything wrong with that if everyone involved has a decent sense of humor, is in the mood, and has a wonderful experience. :)

  107. October 31, 2007 at 4:06 am

    I’m a Brit. I still say “shagging”, although I’ve been known to use “fucking” or “screwing” too. Comic words I’ll only use if I’m intending to be comical, but saying to someone “let’s go boink!”? Um, no.

    For much the same reason I HATE vajayjay. It’s dumb and infantile and gives the impression that female genitalia is (giggle) so naughty (giggle) that we can’t possibly actually SAY it (more giggling).

    If anyone I actually knew used that word I think I’d be giving them the “OMFG you are a child” look. I mean really…do you call a man’s dick his pee-pee?

    Favorite slang word for the vagina – snatch, most definately. I’m not quite sure why, maybe just that it actually sounds active rather than passive.

  108. October 31, 2007 at 4:15 am

    Also interesting, something that Thomas said…

    “I do use a lot of euphemisms for sex, boning among them. But I find I use them very indistinctly; as in, without regard to whether there is penetration or who is penetrating whom.”

    I use boning, screwing, fucking etc this way too. The idea of only using the words to refer to the partner on top never even occurred to me until I was talking to my friend and saying “so I was fucking Dude X” and some guy interrupted me to say “no you weren’t”. In the middle of a bar. I was pretty drunk at the time, but according to my friend I turned around and went “um, excuse me, but I was there, I’m pretty sure I was fucking him” and he then proceeded to explain that this was impossible due to my being a girl.
    He was a bit upset when the friend and I started laughing.

  109. orlando
    October 31, 2007 at 7:07 am

    In Australia a woman’s general genital region has occasionally been referred to as our “map of Tassie”. For those not familiar with the geography of my country (now there’s a double entendre if ever there was one), here it is. You can find Tasmania at bottom right:

    When I first got to uni, a popular euphemism for sex was “romping”. It seemed to drop out of use shortly after, which is a shame, because I think it describes the recreational nature of the event beautifully.

  110. October 31, 2007 at 8:26 am

    I like the word “cunt” as well. But I very rarely would I use it. Here is the original definition of the word (circa 1996):

    [US and UK vulgar slang]: The female genitalia, especially the vulva.

  111. October 31, 2007 at 11:36 am

    After seeing Pirates of the Caribbean 2, I couldn’t help but call my vagina Kraken. When tentacle thing burst out of the water and Jack Sparrow jumped into it’s toothy mouth, all I could think of was “GIANT VAGINA!” Just like Starship Troopers.

    “If you’re lucky later, my Kraken will take down your pirate ship.”

    Ok, so that’s a more extreme slang term. I’m a fan of the straight-forward vagina, sometimes cunt. I hate coocher and pussy.

    For sex, my boyfriend and I fuck or have sex or “play Scrabble.” The latter can lead to interesting conversations. We’re in a long distance relationship so I sometimes have a Facebook status of “Lindsay is wanting to play Scrabble badly right now.” My well intentioned friends bring over a Scrabble board and offer to play, and well, I’m a Divinity school student so they’re not big on the premarital sex so telling how I’m sexually frustrated isn’t quite as appealing for them.

  112. October 31, 2007 at 2:17 pm

    BTW Linguist Steven Pinker has a really good article on swearing here and I would hazard a guess that the reason why the argument between ‘we should be allowed to use nicknames for genitalia’ versus ‘it’s demeaning to use nicknames for genitalia’ which some of the commenters started to touch on, has more to do with avoiding the invocation of the ‘swear reflex’.

    So, forcing people to re-set their responses is a bit futile really IMHO.

  113. annejumps
    October 31, 2007 at 2:50 pm

    Baloney Rose. Which my husband finds hilarious.

    Oh lord. That’s a new one to me and it cracked me the hell up.

  114. ACG
    October 31, 2007 at 5:13 pm

    I happen to love “vajayjay” and use it all the time (advice from 30 Rock‘s Kenneth the Page to “work that vajayjay” had me rolling). I think I like it because it’s so immature and childish, but without the creepy pedophiliac undertones of all the childish names that actually originated from children. For me, at this point in my life, anything going on in that particular area is likely to be playful and fun, and I like having playful and fun names to assign to it.

    I was raised by a doctor and a nurse who started me on the facts of life with a pop-up book around age 5, so I’ve never been reluctant to use precise anatomical terms when appropriate (e.g., with my doctor). In casual conversation, of which there is a surprising lot, it’s “vajayjay,” “vaj,” “girly parts,” “ladybits,” or “down south” (particularly when discussing a man’s willingness or reluctance to head there), and my new favorite term is, of course, “baloney rose.” I’m also amenable to “pussy,” simply because it’s warm, furry, somewhat standoffish to strangers, and friendly when petted.

    Sex, while mid-act, tends to be “having sex” or “making love” or “fucking,” depending on the partner and the circumstances. In discussion, it’s any of those, plus “shagging” (my favorite), “getting horizontal,” “bumping uglies,” “scrogging,” “boinking,” “tapping” (as in, “I tapped that,” which I find appropriate for either partner), “hitting it” (ditto), “boning,” “churning butter,” “sharing bodily fluids,” “getting groiny,” “waking the neighbors,” “making the baby Jesus cry,” and “pointing my heels to Jesus and thinking about handbags,” among others.

  115. Alex
    November 2, 2007 at 1:15 am

    I’ve got no problem using clinical terms with my doctor (my ass and shit are the ones that gives me trouble… I’m always worried about horrifying the poor woman!). Personally I tend to use “cunt”, the boyfriend uses “cunt” or “pussy”, a friend uses “ladybits” or “my bits”… and, occasionally, when we want to be horrifying, my sister and I call it Cthulu (with slurping sound effects). Explaining why would take WAY too long and would only horrify you all further, so I’ll leave you all to just bleach your brains now…

  116. Amy
    November 2, 2007 at 1:31 pm

    A male GYN I used to go to did not for some reason use the proper medical terms when discussing my body with me. He kept saying, “Relax your bottom.”

    Personal favorites are twat and mushmallow.

  117. Cate
    November 25, 2007 at 10:10 pm

    My favorite euphemisms for actually both the female and male genitalia (unisex, how fancy!) are:

    your “hoo-hoo dilly”
    your “cha-cha”
    your “bits”
    and my favorite, your “situation”

    I also really like the Vagina Monologues’ “coochie-snorcher.” It sounds like a Dr. Seuss character. :*)

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