Shorter Donald Trump: I poke it, I own it

Not only is Donald Trump calling Angelina Jolie “no great beauty,” but he’s claiming he’s an expert because he “owns” pageant queens:

“I really understand beauty. And I will tell you, she’s not — I do own Miss Universe. I do own Miss USA. I mean, I own a lot of different things. I do understand beauty, and she’s not,” Trump proudly proclaimed.

And not only is Angelina not as poke-able as the lovely ladies that Trump owns, she’s also uppity enough to think she has the right to do something other than stand around and look nice:

“And now she’s like a representative of the United Nations and world peace on hunger and all of this crap,” he continued. “It’s called give me a break.”

Since Trump was the first one to break out the looks card, I’m tempted to throw it back in his face, but I’ll refrain (because really, does it even need to be said?). We all know Trump’s an a-hole and there isn’t anything productive that can come out of belaboring that point, so instead I’ll conclude the post with a video of the “not beautiful” Ms. Jolie, demonstrating why I’ll take uppity bitches over tacky misogynists any day (warning: it’s a real tear-jerker):

Thanks to Ellen for the link.

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29 comments for “Shorter Donald Trump: I poke it, I own it

  1. dinogirl
    October 29, 2007 at 2:08 pm

    Oh, awesome. I had heard about this video but hadn’t had a chance to watch it. She’s great. She’s a fantastic speaker – so many actors are useless when it comes to stringing together their own sentences, but she’s great. Wow. I am SO impressed by her.

  2. RKMK
    October 29, 2007 at 2:11 pm

    I flove Angelina. FLOVE.

  3. Observer
    October 29, 2007 at 2:11 pm

    Trump didn’t assert ownership over the beauty queens themselves; he says he owns “Miss USA” and “Miss Universe”, which refers to the pageants themselves– which he does, in fact, own. Other than that, great post.

  4. Flowers
    October 29, 2007 at 2:14 pm

    I actually saw him on Larry King at the time he said the quote above, and as much as I hate the man, he did not come across as saying that he owned the women, just the pageants. And he does, in fact, own Miss Universe and Miss USA. They are titles.

  5. Flowers
    October 29, 2007 at 2:15 pm


    Great minds think alike. :) I was a little late in my post. :)

  6. October 29, 2007 at 2:16 pm

    Observer, I realize what he meant — but when he says he owns “Miss Universe,” it does come across as referring to a person, not an event. The way he phrased it, I think, is pretty telling.

  7. Laurie
    October 29, 2007 at 2:18 pm

    Trump is an ass. Because promoting the single minded pursuit of beauty** is *obviously* more important the peace, and alleviating world hunger, and seeing that kids get an education.

    Hey, Donald! How about you use some that insane amount of money you make and hold and use it to do some freakin’ GOOD in the world? (insert unprintables *here*)

    ** And a ridiculously consumeristic and increasingly unattainable standard of beauty to boot. I have worked with some pageant contestants as an alterationist, and they are (at least up here in MN) really nice young women, and generally intelligent and articulate. It’s their focus on their body and appearance and clothing that gives me the willies. But many of them ARE using the pageants as a way to finance their educations. Like the ones in law school I’ve worked with. :)

  8. Eileen
    October 29, 2007 at 2:28 pm

    Was Trump ever more than a joke?

    I think he got so much mileage out of his Rosie feud that he’s trolling for someone to engage with him and get him more attention. I think Angelina Jolie has more important goals and won’t waste her time engaging with this real-life troll.

  9. Bitter Scribe
    October 29, 2007 at 2:29 pm

    I’d say his ability to judge female beauty ranks right up there with his people-handling skills.

  10. Kat
    October 29, 2007 at 2:29 pm

    What is with him? Lately, all the press he gets seems to be in people-bashing. Calling Rosie names, now this with Angelina…. doesn’t he have a business to run or something? Can’t he just go away? What exactly provoked this attack on Angelina? And on her good works?

    Just goes to show, money does not buy class.

  11. Daomadan
    October 29, 2007 at 2:38 pm

    A man with a massive comb over thinks he knows beauty?

    Angelina Jolie is beautiful and it’s not just because of her looks. Thanks for the video.

  12. mom
    October 29, 2007 at 3:04 pm

    Why the hell is he even talking baout this. She is beautiful, but what the f difference does it make — none to him.

    On owning people — hmmm. That seems to be um, illegal, Donald. Yes, Mister Fancypants — we don’t do that anymore.

  13. Thomas, TSID
    October 29, 2007 at 3:05 pm

    Activist, openly bi and an out kinkster — methinks he’s threatened. Every time he opens his mouth he’s highlighting his status anxiety.

  14. Bruce
    October 29, 2007 at 3:26 pm

    This is part of his beef with her relating to her father and his friend, the actor Jon Voight. But why he is “going there” about her looks is beyond me.

  15. Ivyfree
    October 29, 2007 at 3:50 pm

    Second what’s been said above- clearly Trump has a poor set of values. And add to that a poor sense of aesthetics. My son (27) saw Ms Jolie in person once, and he says she is gorgeous. I suspect The Donald is trolling for attention.

  16. getitgirl
    October 29, 2007 at 3:52 pm

    I’m sorry, but I don’t get Donald Trump. I don’t understand why he’s always talking. Can’t he just be satisfied with the gazillions of dollars he has and stay out of the public eye? From what I understand about him, he’s gotten rich by doing nothing more than building eyesores and plastering his name on them.

    Most celebrities are self centered assholes who are used to being catered to and don’t realize there’s a world of suffering out there, both here and abroad.

    Personally, I think it’s great that instead of doing the usual celebrity schtick of taking vacations in exotic locations to “raise awareness” and then forgetting about those she was pretending to care about, Angelina Jolie has made real, honest-to-goodness humanitarian work a priority.

    If Donald Trump died tomorrow, I don’t believe many people would seriously care. Until he starts to do something worthwhile for humanity, he should simply stop talking.

  17. BadKitty
    October 29, 2007 at 3:55 pm

    Based on everything I’ve heard about Trump or heard him say, I think he’s a waste of DNA and a boil on the butt of humanity. I try to be tolerant and patient with my fellow human beings, but I fail to see the point in his case.

  18. Lisa Harney
    October 29, 2007 at 4:46 pm

    What everyone says above: Angelina’s gorgeous, and one of my longest-standing celebrity crushes.

    Ever since Gia.

  19. October 29, 2007 at 5:45 pm

    I second what the Observer says @ #3.
    He’s obviously talking about the brand “Miss USA” and “Miss Universe”.

    It’s still bad, because he’s obviously not a stylist or anyone who understands beauty given his hideous choices in personal styling and given the history of his pageants and how they try to control the contestants’ lives, but in that statement he’s not asserting ownership over people.

  20. October 29, 2007 at 5:45 pm

    Donald Trump is into some very basic principles of beauty. Nothing surprising about that (not that I don’t think that many of the contestants on his shows are gorgeous – they are, but contests mainly seem to revolve around upholding certain standards). Angelina Jolie has very striking features – and not everyone is going to be able to appreciate them. Which is fine as long as, you know, you don’t lash out at the woman like a total idiot. I personally think she’s a stunner, but even if I didn’t – what she’s doing with her life seems a whole lot healthier and productive than, for example, what Trump is doing with his (which, as it seems as of late, basically involves bad-mouthing people for attention).

  21. October 29, 2007 at 5:46 pm

    Argh, it’s so annoying that all my comments are moderated…

  22. JenLovesPonies
    October 29, 2007 at 6:11 pm

    She’s not my particular cupa tea physically, and I do find the constant “I’d go bi for Angelina!” comments annoying as all hell, and she does seem to have spawned a celebrity trend of adopting children as one would purchase a handbag, but I can’t fault her on her UN work. Nor can I imagine why one would.

  23. EG
    October 29, 2007 at 7:26 pm

    Eh, what an inflated sense of self-importance Trump has. I can’t imagine that Jolie is going to be up nights thinking to herself “All is for nought! Donald Trump doesn’t want to fuck me! What reason have I to continue living?”

    Shut up, Trump.

  24. kate
    October 30, 2007 at 12:27 am

    Apparently Trump doesn’t have enough business to keep him busy and yearns for media attention. He’s running out of publicity power and like any true misogynist asshole, goes woman bashing to puff himself up.

    Part of the power play of woman bashers consists of seeing themselves as the ultimate critic on “What Makes a Good Woman”. His cardboard caricatures of women merely reflect his own very narrow perspective of the world around him, which reflects the very narrow, shallow mind he inhabits.

    Pretty pathetic really. That he gets press coverage is what pisses me off. The media just needs to file him under, “un-newsworthy” until he does something meaningful.

  25. October 30, 2007 at 11:21 am

    I had a crush on the boyish-looking Angelina in the movie Hackers. I think I was still kinda young at the time. The movie itself was only likeable in a Gen-X, irony-ladden kitch sort of way (“Hack the Planet!”), especially to someone like me who actually did some low-grade hacking in his spare time… Hollywood has this thing with computers: they never use them in any ways that actually make sense. I’m guessing all the physicists or astronomers banging their heads on the walls at movies like Armaggeddon must feel the same way I do whenever I see Project Swordfish, The Net, or any of those other moronic computer movies.

  26. Bolo
    October 30, 2007 at 3:25 pm

    Trump is a walking reminder that money doesn’t buy class… or taste… or basic human decency.

    In fact, he’s a reminder that it often buys the exact opposite.

  27. Alara Rogers
    October 30, 2007 at 9:39 pm

    I’m sorry, is Donald Trump real?

    I always thought he was like a minor Batman villain or something. I mean, the guy’s name is Trump and he’s a famous businessman who runs casinos. Isn’t that totally comic book?

  28. kate
    October 31, 2007 at 2:56 am

    I mean, the guy’s name is Trump and he’s a famous businessman who runs casinos. Isn’t that totally comic book?

    Agreed, I always thought the same thing.

  29. House of Mayhem
    October 31, 2007 at 2:55 pm

    **Ever since Gia.


    I’d carry her kids.

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