I really hate Subway. I especially hate the way the bread smells. I hate walking by Subways in New York, because they make me feel like I’m going to vomit when I smell them. But apparently my lack of Subway-eating explains my low self-esteem, my stint in therapy, my expanding waistline and my current state of single-hood:
And here I thought law school was to blame for all of that.
Thanks to Morgan for the link.
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I blogged about this too! It’s such a disgusting ad, the campaign concept is clever but their choice of “toppings” leaves much to be desired.
I didn’t mind their original ad campaign, which focused strictly on the physical (for some reason, the phrase “bedonka-donk butt” cracked me up). Trying to convince people that getting fat will ruin their mental health all on its own, like somehow the extra fat cells take up residence in your brain? Bad.
At least now they’re coming out with it. Advertisers have been tapdancing around the “only thin women are loved, and being thin will automatically get you love” meme for decades now, and it’s a great seller to those who are desperate for love and think their fat thighs are what’s standing in the way. When I was young and panting for a boyfriend, I would have fallen for it too, even at a considerably lower weight than my current one.
And it’s so wrong, so poisonous, so inaccurate. If two-thirds of the female population is “fat,” and thus untouchable, how does anyone ever manage to find love or propagate the species? By their yardstick, I don’t exist, being fat and in a loving relationship, and neither do half my friends.
So fine, advertisers, go ahead and festoon yourselves with it, wallow in it, be totally blatant about it, and I will know for sure which of you will never get a pink cent from me again. And you’re right, Jill, their bread is like library paste too.
Since Quiznos markets themselves as the anti-Subway, their commercial plays it the opposite way: the beautiful woman is jealous of the plain woman who doesn’t have to starve herself and so gets to eat a sandwich from Quiznos.
It’s on this page: Sammies commercial.
Because, hey, pitting women against each other and enforcing the notion that you have to starve yourself to be attractive is so feminist. I miss the spongemonkeys.
They’ve got radio ads too, which I keep hearing at the gym. Instead of “loss of boyfriend” it says something like “being single forever”. Either way, it’s noxious.
I talked about this ad on my LJ earlier in the week Men are Shallow, Women are Neurotic. Of course, I get anonymous “omg fat people are awful!” comments, someone (who deleted it) suddenly deciding to give me a lecture on what healthy eating meant (because heaven knows what I was talking about was that everyone should eat McD’s every day), and my resident “everything is all about me” commentator telling me how the ad & discussion should be about him.
What I “like” about this ad is that it doesn’t imply how much I should dread looking every day like I do – it just outright states it.
Subway is godawful. The ingredients (which, let’s face it, is what makes or breaks a sandwich) are far inferior to any other deli around. Quizno’s is better. Togo’s is better. Hoagie Brothers is better. Most privately owned delis are light-years better. The sub they show in that commercial is a particularly egregious form of food porn: even a sub with extra meat, extra veggies and extra cheese isn’t going to look like that.
But ever since they had one superdieter to point to, and nutritional information that said an unadorned turkey sub was healthier than a cheeseburger, they’ve taken the fat-hate route. In addition to this commercial, there’s the obnoxious one where a chubby kid is playing some sort of Pac-man clone wherein the character consumes all sorts of junk food and then is unable to fit through the final passage of the game, the message being “even if you don’t feel the need to diet, you need to feed your children Subway or they’ll become fat and everyone will know you’re a bad mother.” (Based on commercials, fathers can still order pizza to feed their kids when mommy’s away, without any blame.)
I totally see why you hate the ad and it’s definitely problematic. I just wonder why you hate Subway otherwise. How else one is to get quick, healthy and cheap food. I am not asking rhetorically, I really want to know. I don’t love Subway, but it definitely serves a purpose when I don’t have time to cook and want to get decent meal that isn’t too fatty and has lots of vegetables.
I know! The smell of baking bread is among the evocative and they fuck it up so badly. How is that even possible?
After decades of this kind of thing I feel like I’m starting to get numb. I predict that the next hot ad trend will be sound trucks patrolling the streets blasting out, “You’re not good enough! Change!” over and over again.
Oh, Jesus, yes. How can baking bread smell so awful?
How else one is to get quick, healthy and cheap food. I am not asking rhetorically, I really want to know.
With a fuckload of planning. I know, not the easiest thing in the world to do, but it’s very, very satisfying.
I started making myself bento lunches about a year ago, and the creative possibilities keep me enthusiastic enough not to mind a little extra work in the mornings. I have a rice cooker with a timer on it, so I can have sushi rice cooked and ready to go in the morning. I boil eggs for my lunches twice a week (and usually make tea eggs out of them.) It doesn’t take long to pop a little meat in the oven and/or boil some veggies in the morning – usually while I’m making breakfast. I make larger batches of some things – beef with oyster sauce for stir-fry, chicken-filled rolls – and freeze them in small portions to cook later. Fresh fruit is quicker to prepare than cooked vegetables, and I find myself eating a lot of seasonal fruits. Leftovers from dinners are a whole ‘nother realm of possibilities. And the greatest thing about bento is that it limits your portion sizes to a reasonable amount.
And also, they can be terribly cute. I’ll admit that this adds to their appeal for me.
It depends on your budget and how much time you have. Fruit is my favorite fast food – I buy big bags of apples, oranges and peeled carrots and I usually have them with egg or tuna salad sandwiches. Sometimes I put in a yogurt container or some string cheese or a little container of nuts. They have pre-packaged packages of pineapple, melon, and crudites at most supermarkets.
Of course, I have a kitchen and access to pretty good supermarkets. If you don’t, it’s a million times harder.
Oh, and also – I cook every meal myself, which means I often have leftover broccoli or asparagus to add to lunch and sometimes when I’m rushed I bring a frozen container of home-made soup or stew to work. Like I said, it helps if you cook.
It depends where you live, but a lot of independently-owned ‘convenience’-type stores have delis where you can order a sandwich that will be made with whatever you want, in front of you. I know one on my way to work and one a block from work (a block farther than the two Starbucks and the Subway!), but I live in a very dense urban area.
If you’re traveling someplace pretty generic though, yeah, sometimes Subway IS a pretty good option.
I’ll probably remember to go to one of the delis a little more often though, which is part of my plan to support the non-chain stores near my work anyway.
Oh, hey, Mark’s boyfriend!
I saw this comercial and was like, ‘Yes, she gets to keep her self esteem if she eats *gasp* fries!’ I like my salads, fruits, veggies, and whole grains, but there are days where I just feel I just want some fries or something cheesy. Does that food make me fat for life? No. Does the grease cause my digestive system some harm? Yeah . . . but somedays, it’s worth it.
Back when I wasn’t vegan, I avoided Subway like the plague, and was a loyal Togo’s guy. Amazing — I don’t have a sensitive sense of smell at all, but the Subway scent was of warm doughy bread coated with Lysol. It never worked for me, and I suppose I hadn’t realized until now how much it bugged everyone else too.
Something in Subway bread always made me, literally, very very sick. Now my head can match my stomach. Blech.
‘Only eight grams of fat?’ Jesus, that’s a lot of fat for a sammich. And also, bleaugh to the advert.
I have a friend who used to live in New York City and one of her friends there was a neighbor of Jared’s (the “superdieter” referenced above). She said that the only reason he ate all that Subway for so many years was that there was a Subway right across the street from their building and that was the only place Jared was willing to drag his lazy ass to on a regular basis. So take his endorsement with a grain of salt.
There was a Subway next to my laundromat for years (just moved to a new site)- every time they baked the bread, the smell came through the air vents into the laundromat. I love the smell of homemade bread, but there was something just not right with that stuff.
Or maybe it was the combination of bread plus cleaners, as Hugo observed…
Also re: Jared: If you eat the same damn thing every day for months on end, you’re shortchanging yourself nutritionally. You may very well lose weight because you’re consuming fewer calories, but you’ll end up malnourished.
Especially when it’s something awful like Subway.
As for cooking, I do it on weekends, make big batches, and portion and freeze the extras. Many workplaces have microwaves, and even if they don’t, you can make stuff that doesn’t need to be reheated. I just need to take stuff out of the freezer far enough in advance so it will thaw, but it winds up being grab-and-go.
I save myself a ton of money that way, too.
Terrible commercial, but I do enjoy Subway sandwiches. There aren’t really delis where I live so I don’t have much choice. Pitas are a much healthier option though, and there are a couple of pita places. And yes Jill, everything that is wrong with your life (and mine) is law school’s fault. Seriously.
I don’t understand how a sandwich made with sodium-infused lunchmeat can be described as “fresh”. Hot dogs would be equally fresh.
One tablespoon of mayonnaise has 12 grams of fat. Sammiches’ll get you if you don’t watch the person making them carefully.
Plus, the guys selling the food are not exactly “jareds” themselves, now, are they?
This all reminds me I need to get a stew going in the crock pot for this week’s lunch portions. I usually make a soup or stew, put it in the fridge in a sealed container and scoop out what I need into a thermos, after I’ve heated it good in the microwave.
Since I don’t have access to a micro at work (I take lunch in my car), the thermos keeps the meal at least palatably warm and by the time lunch comes around I’m famished so I don’t care too much anyway.
Buying your lunch everyday can add up to quite a lot of money and nutrional loss to boot. I gained a boatload of weight one year going to a diner every lunch time with a co-worker. Even if you think you’re ordering conservative you still could do better making your own lunches.
And yeah, Subway bread always smells weird and i second Hector’s comment about the cold cuts, they are far from ‘fresh’ and also nutritionally no good, loaded as they are with salt, nitrates and tons of fat.
I can’t even think of Subway Jared without adding the phrase “cock-punch-needing”. Thanks, The Onion!
I’m sitting here at work literally two blocks from “Jared”’s Subway, right here in the heartland. Our little college town has dozens of fine delis, ethnic restaurants, pizza joints stocked with whole wheat crust and plenty of veggie toppings, etc., etc. Why, the Siam House down the street has a super-cheap, packed with tofu Thai lunch buffet! I don’t know how Jared ate at that hellhole Subway twice a day, because I can tell you from experience it sucks ass just like the rest of the chain.
Even if you’re feeling lazy, you can make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich by your own damn self. It’s cheaper, packed with beneficial fats, and available in less time than it takes to get the attention of the guy behind the Subway counter. And it doesn’t come with a side of mysogyny and fat hatred!
Sorry – my larger point being, Jared can certainly decide to live his life thinner by subsisting on Subway. I’d rather eat all the fabulous foods just blocks away, and keep my fat ass!
That commercial made me want a cheeseburger.
Seriously. Because I like cheeseburgers. I don’t like Subway, and now I have the additional baggage of knowing that Subway hates fat women like me. So hell, it’s cheeseburger o’clock ! I know my own life and my own mind, and for them to suggest otherwise is insulting.
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