I’ve mentioned before that no “pro-life” group in the United States supports contraception access (despite the fact that contraception is the most effective way to decrease the abortion rate), and we’ve detailed dozens of instances of “pro-life” groups taking active stances against contraception, even though doing so inevitably jacks up the demand for abortion. Now that it’s spring break time, anti-choice groups are again up in arms that Planned Parenthood and other pro-choice groups are giving out emergency contraception. Now, I suspect that a lot of the “College students are having crazy promiscuous spring break sex!!!” headlines are overblown, but whether or not spring break action is as heated as the scaremongers claim, it still makes sense to prevent unwanted pregnancy. The “pro-life” folks, though, would prefer to just tell college students to knock it off and not have sex til they’re married — a scheme that has not worked in any society in the history of the world, but that’s not stopping ‘em from trying. Who knows, maybe 2008 will be their year.
(Of course, they’re also telling us that using the word “vagina” is “live porn” and that masturbation enables violence — it “breaks down the concept of relationship, and thus promotes radical individualism, which is adamantly opposed to community building, which is necessary for the eradication of violence” — so perhaps their understanding of sex and human relationships is a tad off. And no I could not make this shit up if I tried).
So we know that “pro-life” groups are all about increasing the abortion rate in order to promote their no-sexual-pleasure-without-punishment agenda. But what about married folks? To hear anti-choicers talk, marriage is the magic bullet: Sex, which was once dirty and disgusting and shameful, is magically transformed into something beautiful and pleasurable and perfect, and you apparently never need condoms, contraception or abortion, because God has your back. But what about married people who only want two or three or six children, or none at all? What about women who have health or life-threatening conditions that make pregnancy dangerous — and what about men who don’t think their wives should have to sacrifice their lives at the altar of “pro-life” politics?
The solution is simple: Take up Scrabble or something, because you’re gonna need a hobby to make up for all the sex you aren’t having:
It is possible to enjoy, and I mean enjoy, a sexless relationship.
My husband and I married and both agreed that sex meant little to either of us.
We did want a family. But once we had our children, we did not feel the need to continue to have sex.
That doesn’t mean we are not very affectionate towards each other. I believe it helped we are both strong Christians. Neither of us liked the idea of contraception. Sex should, after all, be about having children so instead of any pill or other method distasteful to us, we chose celibacy.
This year we will celebrate our ruby wedding so, at least for us, it worked. I think like the lady who wrote to you, that it can make a relationship stronger.
If you don’t want to have sex, more power to you. If contraception isn’t your bag and you want all acts of copulation to be open to babies, good on you. Do your thing, and I promise 100% that I will not interfere. But that’s the problem with the “have as many babies as God gives you” crowd; since they aren’t satisfied simply having as many babies as God gives them, they want to make you accept their version of God’s plan too.
Anti-choicers argue that birth control is bad because it’s medicine that doesn’t “heal;” there’s nothing disordered about fertility, they argue, so why try to control it? So I wonder, are pro-lifers allowed to take Zicam and AirBorne? I mean, if God wants you to get sick, don’t you think you should accept His gifts? What about vaccines? Preventative medicine in general?
If you don’t want to have sex, don’t have sex. If you think sex should only be for baby-making, then baby-make away. If you think masturbation is murder, then keep your hands above your waist. But can you at least let the rest of us enjoy ourselves?
- Anti-Choicers Defeat Birth Control Bill in South Dakota by Jill February 11, 2008
- College Republicans Diaper Drive at NYU Today by Jill September 26, 2007
- Plans by Jill February 4, 2008
- Leslee Unruh Eats Babies by Jill May 28, 2007
- Pro-Choice Congressmen More Likely to Have Slutty Daughters by Jill June 18, 2007