Speaking as probably one of the older people here, me too. There are “naughty words” I’m more comfortable with in some venues than others, but theyre just words, ya know?

Like you, Belle, most of them I learned from my mother.

i mean if it were concern about -sexist- language as such, I could sort of understand, but–well, again, once more with feeling, say it with me and Kevin Kline:

“You’re the vulgarian, you fuck!”

Proud to blog alongside you, Ren, by any other name, but you already knew that.

Since I was a conventionally pretty straight woman, one of the things I liked about using the word was challenging people’s preconceptions. When I used the word, people said “But you’re pretty! You dont have to be a feminist!” and it gave me the opportunity to expand their horizons just a wee bit.

It still does, and perhaps thats one of the reasons I use it. I find that when you challenge people’s misconceptions, it may not “convert” them to your point of view, but it does tend to open the door a crack, and even that is valuable over time.

Whether Ren or any other woman uses the word or not is none of my business, and I understand why she’s made the choice that she has. Still, I cant help thinking that if she made the choice one day to use it again, it might just open a few cracks in a few doors within as well as without the feminist movement, and that would be worthwhile, both for those whose doors get cracked, and for those Ren helps.

My objection is solely to other feminists’ specific and deliberate rejection of Ren, her life experiences, and her voice, and how that led to her dropping the term “feminist” because of how hostile certain aspects of the movement had become to her, to the point where it affected her health. And to the fact that Ren is not the only woman to have done so. As someone pointed out above, Renee uses the term “womanist” because she doesn’t feel that feminism speaks to her concerns and needs, or represent her voice – hell, sometimes outright rejects her voice! In conversations that are supposed to be about her experiences! What the fuck is that?

Shit, I’m rethinking my use of the word feminism, and wondering if there’s a better word to describe what I do, think, feel, and fight for. For now, I find it important to claim the word so I can be a part of what that word means in our society, but I can’t for the life of me get upset that the fight just isn’t worth it for some folks. Hell, some days, it just isn’t worth it for me.