I don’t know what’s been up lately, but we’ve been getting a series of seriously obnoxious comments and emails (and those are the ones we let through). New readers don’t seem to be coming from any particular place — no major right-wing links — so I can’t figure out what’s sparked the trend. Worst of all, they aren’t even funny enough to add to a Top Troll contest.
So I have two requests. First, dickbags, either start being more entertaining or hit the pavement. Second, non-dickbags, I think my use of “dickbag” has run its course. Any new insult ideas?
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Somehow I’ve missed your use of “dickbag” in the past, because I was just sitting here cracking up over it and loving it!
Well then I suppose we can keep it in use :-)
I think there’s still some air in the tires for “dickbag”. It just works on so many levels.
I’m a fan of “fuckhead”. It’s satisfying, it’s forceful, and near as I can tell it doesn’t have any potentially oppressive connotations. And it sounds great in a string of other “fuck”s.
I honestly don’t even get why they bother picking at feminist blogs. It is not as though anyone is going to take them seriously. They are either going to be shown the door quickly or get told to honk on bobo. It would seem to me that they would make more progress trying to attract the weak minds that don’t dedicate themselves to critical thought.
As for dickbag, I like it. May I borrow the term and of course I will give full credit to you Jill as the creator of said term.
I think the classics are good….
Douchebag
Fuckwad
Jackass
Simple, timeless, and very easy to let loose amid a string of explatives.
I’m a fan of assface.
I’ve always enjoyed “assbasket.”
I think that the fact that Obama got elected has sparked free floating mantroll rage. Cause you KNOW that this means the women might get some more of them there rights and they (the menz) will have to get outta the freaking chair and get their own god damn beer.
I saw somewhere the term “fuckneck.” I think whoever created that is genius.
Wankerror.
It sounds vaguely techincal.
“iTunes encountered an unexpected wankerror and must close. Please contact your vendor if the problem persists.”
But more to the point, why are you dedicating posts to them? Aren’t you giving them more exposure and feeding into the 4chan/sa goal of “if you’re obnoxious enough, they’ll elevate you to your own post” ?
It’s got a limited shelf-life but how about “Bushwad?”
I use “fucktard” and “wanktard” quite a bit.
Douchemonger?
I feel like I just set myself up for a punchline.
“I’m a fan of assface.”
“You would be.”
My daughters fave: dudebag
My faves: Caudal knob and asshat
dudebag is one of my personal faves. I find myself using it most often modified by the term ‘progressive’. When taken together, the meaning is somewhat like ‘fauxgressive’ but with MRA-style obliviousness.
Also, I’ve been thinking about the term ‘douchebag’ more generally. The reason it is understood as an insult by most people is because of its association with IGP (Icky Girl Parts). If this is the intent, then duh, it’s a crappy insult, positively filled with dudebaggery. But, if we use the insult ‘douchebag’ to refer to people who actually share things in common with the literal douchebag, I think we have a useful insult. For example…
Douchebags (of both varieties):
1. are unnecessary, but are foisted upon women;
2. are harmful to women’s health;
3. treat women’s bodies as filthy.
oh…and uh, hi mom (rainie).
I’d like to second Rainie’s nomination of asshat. The visual alone is full of win and awesome.
As a British woman with an RP accent, I could never carry off ANY of these (nonetheless very satisfying) insults (just as I can never say “tush” without sounding ridiculous). I tend to stick to “wanker”, “bastard” (with a northern, short “a” and emphasis on the first syllable), “knob”, “arsehole” or any combination of the lot … :D “Pathetic” is always good too. And “stupid fuck” has a good ring to it as well.
If it’s troublesome, how about “non-entity,” as in “I completely deleted without explanation or fanfare said person, rendering them a non-entity.”
That’s okay, Lauren. I’m a fan of assface myself. Also, douchenozzle.
Yes. Yes, I am.
My personal faves (in no particular order) are:
fuckface
flaming ass pimple
asshat
assface (or fucking assface)
fuckwad
fuckwit (for the especially dumb of course)
jackhole (if you don’t want to swear)
syphlitic pustule
and the old-fashioned but ever useful fucking asshole
Thomas: I almost included douchenozzle, too!
(another) Rachel — the -tard suffix — however nicely it rolls off the tongue, reinforces hatred of the mentally challenged. We should do better than that. :)
I am fond of “shitstain” for those particularly loathesome instances of pseudohumanity.
Might Ponygirl: I always assumed it was a variation of bastard.
…also not too awesome.
When we come up with slurs based on things that people have no control over (whether their mental capabilities, their sexual orientation, or the marital status of their parents) it’s always worth taking a minute to think about the intersectionality of oppression. It’s something to think about, at any rate.
My thesaurus-brain suggests “schlongsack”. Also, various dialects in English have the delightful “pillock”.
Vail – fuckneck originates at Shakesville, where somebody had a tale of a young dude who in a fit of something had the word “Fuck” tatooed on his neck, right where it was nearly impossible to hide.
How about “wankstain”? I saw that once on a now defunct website called Vent and it cracked me up. But please keep dickbag; that is so awesome!
I am rather fond of the terms “dick face” or “dong breath”
27 MP: You can pry “I can’t work with you people, and you know why? Because you’re BASTARD PEOPLE!” from my cold, dead fingers.
I respond quicker to “Dumbass” or maybe just plain old “Asshole” – I’m a bit old fashioned that way. Still – “Dickbag” has a certain something to it.
i’m partial to “fucking assmunch” myself.
“Fuckface” is a classic, and “fuckstain” is charmingly vulgar, but doesn’t have the most satisfying ring. I too was on the search for new, non-gendered profanity, until it came to my attention that Rahm Emanuel refers to Republicans as “knucklefucks.” Whatever you think of him as a person, I hope we at feministe can all agree that “knucklefuck” is a brilliant coinage and Rahm Emanuel should be thanked for this linguistic gift, which I now plan to use at every available opportunity.
The preferred insult of my teenage and early adult years among my friends was “dickwad.” Lately, it’s had something of a revival.
Shitstain
Cockwad
Douchetube (but when I say this, I get a mental image of YouTube, but DoucheTube)
Asshat (check out now-defunct usr/bin/W00T webcomic for her depiction of people with ass hats!)
Fuckwit
Fuckwit is my particular favorite, as a sort of contraction of “fucking witless”.
May I suggest that since you are fortunate enough to be dealing with email as opposed to physical confrontation that you use something like e-dick (or dick-e). I always thought dickhead was perfect because I always think of the Robin Williams line about men having a brain and a penis and only enough blood for one at a time.
“dick drip” or “cock drool” ~~~either one goes well prefaced with “putrid”.
as in, “shut the fuck up, ya putrid dick drip.”
or, “hey cock drool, your fly is open.”
~~~gogo
Over at Shakesville, they stole the term “fuckneck” from a troll and now use it for good instead of evil. It cracks me up every time I read it.
But “dickbag” is good! Not only is it an amalgamation of “dick” and “douchebag,” it also evokes the image of a big old bag of dicks, which cracks me up a bit as well.
cocklint.
Gendered insults are … GOOD.
Can we start to call the extreme feminists genitalia related words as well? Or are you assuming only the mra types are rude and obnoxious enough to be insulted?
CHOAD. it’s been my favorite word lately.
choad. what a choad.
I like “shitstain,” myself, and once said “dickshit” as an unintentional amalgam of “dick” and “dipshit”, and it’s grown on me a little since then. And I think Vail’s right that there is an element of post-election backlash going on on the interwebs.
I am rather fond of wankbucket, personally. Modifying adjectives to include ‘crusty’ and ‘putrefying’.
I vote for asshat (oh, the absurdity!), but also assbasket, wankstain, fuckwit… And choad is classic, as well as choadery. Oooh, and a new fave: fuckstick. And air-biscuit!
Oh, and MightyPonyGirl, thanks for bringing up bastard as a not-cool term in this type of usage. This adopted person thanks thee. Btw, I’m working on reclaiming it. There’s something about how some people reacted to the news of my adoption that just makes me say, “Why, yes, indeed, I’m a bastard. Yup. And?”. Just rubbing the ridiculousness of their barely-hidden disdain in their faces :)
This is fun! :)
Beavis and/or Butthead work too.
Gendered insults are … GOOD.
Can we start to call the extreme feminists genitalia related words as well? Or are you assuming only the mra types are rude and obnoxious enough to be insulted?
Yes, because MRAs are some of the most ridiculously obnoxious idiots on the face of the earth. ‘Wahh, teh menzz are so persecuted! Wah!
I recognise your name from Alternet, and IIRC, you’re one of the irrational, obsessive feminist-haters from there.
Anyway, I nominate ‘malignant fuckstick’. I’m not crazy about gendered insults, as a rule, but that one is music to my ears.
Personally, I like “ass-chapeau”.
I’m a huge fan of cockwrinkle, cockworm, assbag and fuckwit. Hope it helps :P
This thread is cracking me the fuck up. My favorite lately is “douchetruck,” even though it sometimes brings up terrifying images of some kind of nightmarish ice cream truck.
And adding “penis” to anything results in hilarity. My boyfriend calls people “penis weasel” all the time, which leads to
clever and wittytotally immature exchanges:“Penis weasel!”
“Penis shuttle!”
“Large hadron penis collider!”
“….Fuck you.”
I coined (as far as I know) the term “cockstick” at another message board, and it tested very well.
“Dickbag” is just dandy, BTW.
I tend to use “dick-shit”, but I think “dickbag” is hysterical. I hope you feel no great desire to retire the term.
What about bitchnuts? Or cockmongler. Cockmongler will never cease to crack me up.
I’m going to go with the super-traditional and just go with ‘wanker.’ Sure, we all masturbate, but the British have so much history before us… and it has a beautiful sort of literature to it. Also it reminds me of Oasis. And the Gallaghers are wankers. Plus their name has “hers” in it. Wankers. And I’ve had a bit too much beer.
*tipsy giggle*
Buttwipe. Or asswipe.
Cumstain.
Bastard – not OK. It’s a slut-shaming word for single mothers. And their children.
On reflection, there’s also “pigfucker” and variants.
Unless that’s offensive to pigs, I suppose.
non gender specific insults are always better, like calling someone an asshole or my favourite, a piece of shit.
I’m a fan of “craniorectally-impacted fuckmitten,” myself. That or “subliterate, corner-pissing imbecile.”
OK-I’m going to regret saying this, and I love all the terms used above (except choad… I just don’t like how it sounds) but if y’all are going to be upset by gendered swears you can’t really use cock/dick or any references to semen, because those are gendered insults for men. Using them is theoretically just as bad as saying pussy, right?
This being said I am not trying to be nitpicky, it just strikes me as odd that several people have (quite rightly) stated that the use of gendered swears is bad, and none of them have seen that these terms are gendered to men.
I don’t think we should stop saying them (or really most swear words) I’m just pointing it out .
And my favorites are crusty fuckstick and cumslushie, the latter I coined in high school.
I use “fucknugget”. Don’t know just how I invented it, but I think I may have been inspired by the less than conscientious driver of a Tinypenismobile.
misskate — it’s difficult because younger generations don’t attach so much stigma to having children out of wedlock, and so they don’t see the term “bastard” as a perjorative to describe anything but an utter asshole, there isn’t a connection to the word’s actual meaning, per se.
I don’t like gangpiling because someone doesn’t know — but it’s important for people to understand that the word “bastard” isn’t just a historical insult, there are people still alive today who have and continue to have that word thrown at them as a classist, slut-shaming insult.
Whenever I’m tempted to describe an asshole as a bastard, I usually divert it to “Bastage” from Johnny Dangerously while I work this one out. :)
I once accidentally called someone a “shitting piece of fuck.” Sometimes, there are happy accidents. :)
Let me add “Caput Ricardus”–Latin for Dick Head.
I’d like to put a vote in for “fuckface”
“Large hadron penis collider!”
I think I might just legally make that my official name, to make paperwork hilarious.
In the meatspace I use “git” and “prat” a lot, but am also a fan of of the dadaist movement of insults, ending with “on a stick”. 9-fisted dvd-flavoured purple stick-on-a-stick is one of my best.
Farking fuckcicle. Or farking fucksandwich. Or farking fuckmonger.
Anything that begins with ‘farking fuck-’ is awesomesauce.
Farking fucksauce on a stick!
The one I laughed at the most was “shitting piece of fuck”.
To Mighty Ponygirl- from the same film- for years I used to call people “farging iceholes,” but most people didn’t get it.
Also, if anyone can tell me where the expression “son of a motherless goat!” came from, I will forever be grateful.
I’m also particularly fond of dickweed. Is it a dick with a weed? Is it a weed like a dick? Who knows?
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