Comments on: Anti-Feminist Vandalism

By: Radfemsrevil

Radfemsrevil — Mon, 02 Mar 2009 10:42:50 +0000

The more I see feminist keep lowering the bar
on what is and isn’t rape. The more convinced
I am that feminist are trying to criminalize all male sexual behavior.
Pro feminist men are nothing more than useful idiots to feminist.
Weaving the rope that feminist will be use to hang them.

By: Inter-sex and inter-gender solidarity ? | Toban Black

Inter-sex and inter-gender solidarity ? | Toban Black — Wed, 18 Feb 2009 22:28:01 +0000

[...] Ontario, Canada – - Sociological Images – “Defending privilege” – Feministe – “Anti-Feminist Vandalism” – The F-Word – “Real men and rape” – Feministing – “Fun with Feminist [...]

By: T B

T B — Fri, 13 Feb 2009 16:12:44 +0000

Hey everyone,

I originally posted one of those photos — the first one — on Flickr.

There are more responses to that first photo here -
http://www.flickr.com/photos/tobanblack/3216214895/

There are two other related photos of another flyer nearby that was torn down quickly -
http://www.flickr.com/photos/tobanblack/3211592108/
http://www.flickr.com/photos/tobanblack/3215929685/

The other day an anti-feminist troll started bombarding me with comments on Flickr (about how all ‘feminists’ are anti-men). Those commetns are at those pages.

Cheers.

By: Will

Will — Tue, 10 Feb 2009 20:30:36 +0000

Sorry about the double post, but I just wanted to add casual use of “rape” to mean “defeat” to Cara’s list of ways people play along with rape culture. I can’t tell you how uncomfortable I get every time someone says “we totally raped the other team” or “man, I just raped my midterm” or “I got raped by some tequila shots last night.” And if it makes me uncomfortable, I can’t imagine how it would feel to be a survivor and hear that.

By: Will

Will — Tue, 10 Feb 2009 20:22:00 +0000

@William -
I might be repeating Cara in different words here, but I think the distinction comes down as between knowing you did something wrong (a feeling most of us get on a pretty regular basis) and knowing you did serious violence to someone’s bodily integrity (not a feeling most of us get on a regular basis). And I think the space where educating (some, many) men is really useful falls in that crack. I don’t understand how getting (some, many) men over that gap means we as a society are covering up people’s capacity to be casual rapists; I think it means we are acknowledging that and naming it the collective crisis it should be named.

I remember when I was around seven, I was at my sister’s birthday party and during a game of musical chairs, I put my hand down on a chair just before one of my sister’s friends sat down. As a result, I accidentally touched her in an (obviously; I was seven) non-sexual way. I remember being confused when my parents took this very seriously – pulled me into the other room and gave me a talking to about appropriate and inappropriate touching. After all, neither she nor I thought anything of what had just happened. Was my parents’ response out of proportion with what happened? Absolutely. Did it teach me the important lesson that when it comes down to people’s bodies, there are no excuses? Absolutely. That’s the kind of education I think is important. Young men need to learn ASAP that their privilege gives them an endless supply of excuses for doing terrible things, and that they need to ignore those excuses and be especially respectful when people’s bodies are at issue.

By: Cara

Cara — Tue, 10 Feb 2009 04:37:39 +0000

Yet again, Steve, we apply the standard of “if it’s not about you, don’t make it about you.” That being said, far too many men who don’t rape play along with rape culture. They turn a blind eye when a friend purposely tries to get a woman drunk so that she’ll “have sex” with him when she otherwise wouldn’t. They laugh at rape jokes. They talk shit about victims, and “how she wanted it,” or about how a woman dresses and what it says about her sexual availability. Etc.

By: Steve

Steve — Tue, 10 Feb 2009 04:29:33 +0000

I am a man and I don’t like the statement, “Real men do not let men rape.” The implication is that its my fault if someone sexually assaults a woman. Or that I’m not a real man if I don’t…. what?

By: Axiomatic

Axiomatic — Mon, 09 Feb 2009 15:31:13 +0000

Well, it’s statistically unlikely that the person who cut up the flier (or is that flyer?) is reading this blog, so writing a post in a blog to them would be an empty gesture, wouldn’t it?

Although now that I think about it, it might serve to make a point if you posted a new message directed at the vandal in the same place the vandalized message was previously. So instead of a piece of paper saying REAL MEN DO NOT LET MEN RAPE, it’d say something like TO WHOEVER THINKS RAPE IS FUCKING HILARIOUS or something, with a longer message in smaller print beneath it where you, in calm and reasonable language, explain why what they did was wrong.

Granted, it’s not likely to have much of an effect on the actual person who did the original cutting up, provided they ever actually see the new message, but it might still be a good thing to do.

By: ThickRedGlasses

ThickRedGlasses — Sun, 08 Feb 2009 22:31:33 +0000

Everyone has an opportunity to learn. If I didn’t think I could teach/inform people, I wouldn’t bother writing for a feminist blog. But I don’t think that everyone is going to take the opportunity to learn. And I don’t have the time to teach everyone. Whoever did this to that sign up above, they fall into those latter categories in my book. If they fall into different categories in yours, that’s your prerogative.

It seems like your view of people uneducated in feminism is pretty negative and that you only have time to preach to the choir. Instead of writing this post to the person who cut up that poster, you wrote it to the people who already know it’s wrong to do something like that. What does that accomplish? Pretty much nothing.

By: William

William — Sun, 08 Feb 2009 04:48:49 +0000

So, upon reflection it seems that I was responding to a lot of things that weren’t part of the thread. Part of it is that I have a client right now with a history of low grade sex offenses and the “just being a jerk”/”being a rapist” semantic tap dance has been on my mind lately. As for most rapes not being the dark alley scenario, between my own history as a survivor and working in mental health believe me, I know. My point was more that I find the rationalization and denial that both offenders and the general society engage in to be a big part of the problem. I apologize if I jumped down anyone’s throat.