Feministe’s Next Top Troll, March Madness Edition: The GET A SENSE OF HUMOR, BITCHEZ Bracket

by Jill on 3.25.2009 · 47 comments

in General

It’s March Madness, Feministe-style: We’re doing a troll run-off to highlight some of our all-time favorite comments and pick the winner of Feministe’s Next Top Troll, Season 4. This is Bracket Two, the GET A SENSE OF HUMOR, BITCHEZ Bracket.

Potentially triggering troll comments below the image. Vote for your favorite of the GET A SENSE OF HUMOR, BITCHEZ bracket at the bottom.


Johnny:

Wow, have a sense of humor. I thought both were hysterical. Fat, ugly women of the world put down your donuts and express your outrage!

VERSUS

Eliza:

Oh girls, you are so against the male race it is ridiculous! Men naturally have different senses of humor. What is wrong with sexism anyway? We are both different sexes! Making fun of our differences is a way to humorize them, it isn’t indicating that one sex is better than the other. Back before feminism became fanatic and abusive towards the male sex, I’m sure many housewives that did their family’s laundry (including their husband’s) didn’t despise and hate her husband for doing it, she was supporting him while he was helping to provide for her and her family. If more fanatic feminists stopped trying to feminize the male community and masculinize the female community we, (this whole country and over) would be in a far better situation.

Who will be Feministe’s Next Top Troll?

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i.am.tracy.flick « must be spoken, made verbal, and shared.
3.25.2009 at 9:12 pm

{ 46 comments }

1 Ali 3.25.2009 at 11:42 am

Jill, is there any chance you can tell us what threads all our lovely troll comments were supposed to go to? Some of them seem pretty obvious but other ones I’m scratching my head over. buh? What was that in response to???

2 SLiver Of Jade 3.25.2009 at 11:52 am

I second the request for references to original threads. Although I doubt that will help my poor brain futilely attempting to follow the logic.

3 Laurie 3.25.2009 at 11:58 am

Eliza wins hands down. She gets ignorance points for referring to males and females as separate “races,” she gets lack-of-vocabulary points for making up the word “humorize,” and she gets crazy points for implying that not wanting to do your husband’s laundry makes you an abusive fanatic.

4 Jill 3.25.2009 at 12:00 pm

I can’t remember where all of the comments came from — I’ve aggregated them over time — but where I do remember, I’ve added in links. Thanks for the suggestion!

5 Turbopixie 3.25.2009 at 12:07 pm

You guys, Ladies, Girls

So not only attempting to talk down to us, but also ignoring all the men who visit this site and don’t troll the comment.

Eliza wins!

6 Ennia 3.25.2009 at 12:24 pm

I know it’s early in the brackets and few upsets are expected right now… but I hope the competition gets a bit tighter rather than the current trouncing. There’s nothing like a really good Troll off.

7 Mr.Pendent 3.25.2009 at 12:27 pm

I voted for Eliza for two reasons:

1) a lot of alliteration

2) this bit of a sentence: ”

…she was supporting him while he was helping to provide for her and her family. ”

I guess it’s not his family? Does he keep his somewhere else?

:rolleyes:

8 Michelle 3.25.2009 at 12:54 pm

I’m going for Johnny, just to be different. And because it’s short but manages to pack of lot of stereotypes.

9 AL 3.25.2009 at 1:01 pm

Shouldn’t Johnny get extra points for fat-shaming? be open-minded here, people

10 DireSloth 3.25.2009 at 1:05 pm

Eliza wins my vote for her unironic use of the term “male race”.

11 Mo 3.25.2009 at 1:08 pm

I’m going to have to vote for Johnny, just because I support the Donut Party. He really tries to hurt my happy, fat, PRETTY self… But I’ll be damned if I’m gonna give up my Mighty-O vegan donuts.

12 Katlyn 3.25.2009 at 1:11 pm

“What’s wrong with sexism anyway? We are both different sexes!”

Yeah, wow. Winner.

13 Sailorman 3.25.2009 at 1:14 pm

Eliza: great alliteration, and the classic “what is wrong with sexism anyway?” metacomment.

14 Ashley 3.25.2009 at 1:20 pm

Eliza wins. I find her concern for the people of Over particularly touching.

15 Natalia 3.25.2009 at 1:21 pm

Eliza for the sheer, unabashed stupidity.

16 Natalia 3.25.2009 at 1:23 pm

Eliza wins. I find her concern for the people of Over particularly touching.

And Ashley wins too. At awesomeness. ;)

17 victoria 3.25.2009 at 1:36 pm

Eliza, with the help of her superb colluder strategy, wins this round.

18 KathyMarie 3.25.2009 at 1:41 pm

I’m voting the “Helpful Troll” ticket today.

Eliza, because she’s so eager to point out feminsim’s wrongs, as though all we need is a firm hand to lead us back to the kitchen, a nice hot cup of tea, and her explanation of the world to wake us up from this crazy spell we’ve been having. Charming.

And also for saying “Making fun of our differences is a way to humorize them” because saying the same thing is a way to say the same thing, but with made-up words.

19 Jamie 3.25.2009 at 1:57 pm

I had to vote for Eliza… that was just so, so bade, asking about what’s wrong with sexism while talking down to those who come here for, you know, education and awareness of various women’s issues.

I like how she pointed out that feminism abused husbands, like there this was thing with feminism running around, carrying a bat in its hand, and hitting any man that was a husband.

Plus, feminizing men? Puh-lease. I don’t think any less of myself as a person for doing the dishes and cleaning up around the house. Nor do I think that strong women are bad for being strong, especially since being strong should NOT be a male-only thing.

20 ACG 3.25.2009 at 2:03 pm

I thought long and hard about this for, like, four or five seconds, and I had to go with Johnny because I just felt he was a better representation of the category. But Eliza, entertaining in her own right, definitely would have been the top contender for the “Come on, boys, I’m nonthreatening!” “No, really, girls suck!” Sister-Fucker category.

21 ThickRedGlasses 3.25.2009 at 2:09 pm

I voted for Eliza, because I cannot vote for anyone who tells me to put down my donuts.

22 E.M. Russell 3.25.2009 at 2:12 pm

Eliza, because she’s got to be a man in woman’s clothing… you know what I mean. Secretly a dude. That’s what I meant.

23 Radfem 3.25.2009 at 2:32 pm

Eliza because when she says “we”, she makes a real effort to be inclusive of the entire country. That indicates room to grow.

24 Oriniwen 3.25.2009 at 2:48 pm

Eliza due to sheer length of the post. Giving someone enough rope and all that …

25 Kristen J. 3.25.2009 at 3:11 pm

Johnny…because he made me and the SO crave donuts…the SO is heating the oil and I’m off to make some andagi…..mMmmm

26 Bitter Scribe 3.25.2009 at 4:54 pm

Eliza, for what Mr. Pendant said. “Her family,” my ass.

Also, I wonder if that’s really her name, or it’s some weird allusion to Pygmalion/My Fair Lady?

27 William 3.25.2009 at 5:11 pm

Eliza takes my vote because I will always have a soft spot in my heart for people who transparently pose as a member of the group they’re about to put down in an attempt to immunize themselves from criticism.

28 leeholloway 3.25.2009 at 5:52 pm

Eliza wins for the following reason:

– “What is wrong with sexism anyway? We are both different sexes!”

29 codyb 3.25.2009 at 6:04 pm

eliza is insulting, but makes an attempt at seeming intelligent even if it crashes and burns pitifully.

johnny is just a douchebag
johnny’s got my vote!

30 Yolanda C. 3.25.2009 at 6:33 pm

Back before feminism became fanatic and abusive towards the male sex, I’m sure many housewives that did their family’s laundry (including their husband’s) didn’t despise and hate her husband for doing it,

Is it just me, or does every troll seem to have trouble with subject-verb agreement? I’ve got to say—for that and her classic Feminism as Man’s Oppressor meme, Eliza wins hands down.

31 10G 3.25.2009 at 7:31 pm

You know–my vote would be a tie, if that were possible….but it’s not, so I went with Eliza. There was so much more of her ass-buggery-ness there to hate……

32 Lauren 3.25.2009 at 8:10 pm

Seconding DireSloth on the “male race” bit.

33 RacyT 3.26.2009 at 12:32 am

Eliza, because she is clearly in high school (or possibly grade school) and she deserves points for being a misogynist child prodigy.

34 Ishtar 3.26.2009 at 4:32 am

Eliza…many reasons but my number 1 reason would be because of her smug, patronising tone. How on earth would we ever know how to act as women, excuse me, girls, if she wasn’t there to point out our faults?

35 Laughingrat 3.26.2009 at 9:29 am

Hmm…Johnny’s a dirtbag, but Eliza’s insidious. Which to choose, which to choose…

36 Faith from F.N. 3.26.2009 at 10:47 am

Eliza. No question.

Damn.

37 Jade 3.26.2009 at 10:51 am

I put down my doughnut long enough to vote for Eliza. Take that, Johnny!

(OK, full disclosure, it was toast with colby cheese melted on top. Yum.)

38 Bagelsan 3.26.2009 at 3:07 pm

I guess it’s not his family? Does he keep his somewhere else?

Well, he has a couple that are kind of scattered around…and don’t know about each other…

39 Ledasmom 3.26.2009 at 4:15 pm

Eliza, for stretching out a lack of logic that could have been expressed in one short sentence to fill a bloated, badly-written paragraph.

40 tia 3.26.2009 at 4:56 pm

eliza. i love long detailed arguments that dont make any sense what so ever.

41 Roving Thundercloud 3.26.2009 at 5:08 pm

Johnny: not a single original idea in there, but neatly tied together into one sentence.

Eliza: a traitor to the female race.

42 idyllicmollusk 3.26.2009 at 7:45 pm

My mind’s not made up, but I am fascinated by Eliza’s use of the terms “male race” and “male community”.

I also give her props for co-opting some of the terms and tones of feminists, social justice advocates, and liberals as though that will mask her hatred of women.

43 CrazyTrollFinder 3.26.2009 at 8:39 pm

Oh yeah, Lisa definitely wins this one.

I read this earlier today and was reminded of it when I saw this troll, daridaist, attacking this random woman, check out a few of his comments where he just goes on and on and doesn’t seem to be able to figure out which of his comments are insulting to women:

i just want one woman to accept that when you find a man attractive you think that his opinions are also superior and he is a noble person.

And I don’t know why do I care. I should just look at the past election.

Whenever women find a guy attractive they vote for him.

and because you got aggressive i am sure that I was right that jocks made fun of u or ignored u:)

this is why you have thing for foreigner guys:)

let me tell you something you sound like a really dumb fatass slut:)

i am sure you pay the bills of your bf:) this is the only way you can get a bf.

When she accuses him of being a misogynist for about the 10th time, he says this:

have you never heard a wife praising his loser dumb husband?

i think this is a part of human nature but for you this this is hating woman. i wish you good luck.

The rest is here on this YouTube video

44 carrie 3.26.2009 at 8:46 pm

I suppose Eliza also thinks racism is okay since there are different races?

45 SunlessNick 3.26.2009 at 10:45 pm

“Male race” swings it for me, and I vote Eliza.

(And for what it’s worth, this site has never made me feel hated or attacked)

46 rachel 3.28.2009 at 6:01 pm

of course racism is ok because there are different races…the male race and female race!!!

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