HUGE TRIGGER WARNING
So remember how we were having a conversation fairly recently about assholes who throw around the word “rape” to mean anything but? Well I’m sure you’ll all be shocked to know that not every person on the internet read that discussion about how horrifying, triggering, pointless, blatantly misogynistic and fucking stupid such a use of the word is.
Including, even more shockingly, the fine folks at that upstanding blog known as Gawker (which, I believe I was recently reading, doesn’t currently have a single regular female writer on staff?). Because this is how CajunBoy decided to describe the awful, no good, very bad experience of . . . wait for it . . . developing a TV show! (Below the fold, and again, Huge Trigger Warning)
From the creative end, developing a television show these days is sort of like giving birth to a daughter, your work, a daughter that you raise and nurture with tremendous care, and then one day you bring her, beautiful, statuesque, perfect in your eyes, to the church to walk her down the aisle, where a dashing groom, the American television viewership, is waiting to embrace her on the other end of the aisle. But just before the organist plays that “Here Comes the Bride” song so she can begin her walk down the aisle, out pops a herd of groomsmen, television executives, who proceed to throw your daughter down and violently gang-bang her in the back of the church, and by the time they’re done with her she’s bloody, beaten, and battered, almost completely unrecognizable to you, the person who raised her. Both of her eyes are swollen completely shut, one of her legs is broken, she can barely function at all, and then the very groomsmen, the television executives, who just finished violently raping her turn to you and say, “Okay, now make her walk down the aisle,” and you, the person who conceived her, nurtured her and cared for her for all those years, has to walk with her as she hopelessly flounders her way down, and all the while you’re hoping beyond hope that she a) makes it all the way down before completely collapsing and b) that her groom, the American television viewer, isn’t so freaked out by her when he sees how hideous she now looks that he turns and bolts out of the church.
So. Creating a TV show — a TV show — is just like creating a person. Who is inevitably female because women are the ones you dress up and mold as you see fit and certainly never the creators in any equation, which is why the developer in this pathetic excuse for a “metaphor” is necessarily male. And having someone water down and change your TV show — a TV show — is just like having someone violently gang rape your daughter! Even worse, you’re left with the miserable prospect of selling her off now that she’s been totally ruined. Wow, am I glad I don’t work in television!
Hey, I wonder how the TV show in this “metaphor” feels? Oh, that’s right — TV shows don’t have feelings! Because they’re objects, and property that you pawn off on other people! Just like women! Which is why this metaphor is totally apt, not even remotely revolting, and completely okay for publication on a blog with ridiculously high traffic!
Gee, I hope the feelings of too many men with daughters weren’t harmed in the reading of that blog post. We wouldn’t want any people getting hurt.
Clearly CajunBoy was thinking of such a possibility when someone called his “metaphor” “uncomfortable and strange,” because he responded in the comments with:
Yeah, I can see that. I actually hesitated right before posting it worried that some might find it offensive, but I decided to go with it, if only because I think that there’s a feeling of being violated that goes along with having something you create utterly destroyed by idiots.
But regardless, sorry if that metaphor offends you. I mean no offense, obviously, I just couldn’t think of a better may to put it once I spit it out onto my screen.
Oh, well then, he meant no offense. And remember, folks, he hesitated. Clearly he’s not just some misogynistic asshole who randomly runs around throwing out hugely violent rape metaphors like it’s no big deal, irregardless of the huge portion of the female population that has been subjected to sexual violence! He thinks about it for a minute or two first. (And then decides to do it anyway.)
Let me tell you — and I’m sure that most of you get this, but I’m really angry, so let’s go there anyway — I’ve had things I’ve created destroyed by idiots. Plenty of fucking times. I’m a bit of a perfectionist, and I’m a writer, and I don’t usually work well in groups, so I’m sure it’s not a huge stretch to see how such a thing may have happened at various points. I’ve also, since we’re talking about me now, been raped. (Though I haven’t been a father with a daughter that’s been raped — so clearly I can’t comprehend the worst of the impact, but I can only work with what I have.)
You get exactly one guess as to which one still occasionally gives me nightmares ten years down the line. And then don’t you even dare think about telling me what it feels like to be “violated” as a means to defend the downright, unapologetic and misogynistic stupidity up above.
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