When a woman attempts to educate a man on misogyny, one of several things happens:

– “what are you, a ball-busting feminazi?”
– “isn’t it cute how I can wind you up and make you angry just by saying some things?”
– “chill out, it was just a joke”
– “I know *you’re* not like that! I’m talking about those *other* women, they’re bitches”
– “men are suffering too!”
– “you can’t imagine how hard it is to be a man”

and so on.

Only men can train men not to be misogynists because misogynists will only pay attention to men. The whole *essence* of misogyny is that you don’t think women are human, so when a woman stands up for herself, it does not invoke the necessary empathy he would need to feel in order to acknowledge her point. He just feels like she’s challenging him undeservedly, because women should not challenge him, and he will either get super-defensive or he will patronize her.

When my three-year-old gets mad because she wants something RIGHT NOW! and it’s totally unfair that she can’t have noodles for dinner every day, I patronize her. I say she’s fussy and I laugh. because she’s three and her issues, while they may be important to her, are objectively totally trivial. What misogynists often do is to take the genuine anger women feel at being treated as subhumans and treat it the way I treat my three-year-old’s anger. Because, see, we’re not fully adult humans, and therefore our anger can’t be important.

Women do try to have this conversation. I’ve tried, with male friends who put me in the “honorary guy” category. It doesn’t help; I’m still female. The education of men about misogyny *must* come from men because misogynists dismiss everything women have to say.

I mean sure, it feels good, and it feels like the right thing to do. But does it remove these people’s misogyny or actually increase their perceived-excuses for having it? Let’s be real here.

—

Now, when I talk to men who have the issue, I EXPECT the man to take full responsibility for the misogyny and over-come it. I never not once mention the women, but the onus solely on HIM, and re-educating him.

I don’t blame him, insult him, shame or berate him, but explain how patriarchy has brainwashed him… And that actually works most of the time in completely rebirthing a man and removing all of the misogyny. It doesn’t feel as good as berating him, but his misogyny is gone forever.

—

Don’t expect me to oversimplify the issue to just one factor and “Oh, he should just HANDLE IT” (which he should).

But I will tackle another factor, whether you like it or not, it exists, and its objective.

When a boy get a little bit of initial misogyny installed in him… (from the patriarchal media)… The very first thing that happens… is that now, when he tries to talk to a girl he has a crush on… For some reason, she treats him like dirt [in his perception] where in truth she was just reacting to his misogyny.

The misogyny grows a bit more (he’s reaffirmed his misogynistic beliefs through his “bitter experience”)… So his misogyny is now even greater… He interacts with a few more women, and they (for some reason unknown to him) act cold, distant and as if he were somehow defective (what he doesn’t know is, that they’re doing so because of his now increased misogyny, which creeps in so subtly in his psyche, that he doesn’t notice it).

Guess what, now he has a ton more “evidence” for his warped belief-system. After all, all the women he talks to are “mean, rude and cold for no reason”… or so he thinks. (remember, his ego-defense-mechanisms prevent him from seeing his own misogyny)

=================

The point is… Its a loop. Misogyny creates more misogyny, which creates more misogyny, which creates more misogyny, which creates more misogyny.

The loop has to be broken at some point. It can either be some sort of catharsis where he gets it by some miracle. It can be a male mentor (ex misogynist) who can mentor him/educate him away from it. Or a woman who does such.

Now… What I am going to suggest is not going to be popular, but deal with it, its just objective truth that it can help.

Don’t ASSUME that if a man acts misogynistic around you, that he’s a lost case, and all you can do is berate him for it (which feels right, but doesn’t work). Again, I realize this is an unpopular idea… but… I’m going to utter it again.

Consider actually educating him. No, not trigger all his ego defense mechanisms with “you hate women”, “you should just treat women like humans”… etc.

It doesn’t work. At least not without an introduction. Help him understand how the patriarchy is hurting him, and how he’s affected by it… then explain objectification.
=================

Again, not going to be a popular statement, but I shall utter this as well, as its an objective assessment.

Most women (huge percentage) will not bother to re-educate him, but will simply berate him and move on… letting him move on to the next woman with even more misogyny.

Why should I bother? Its his fault if he has it… and so he moves to the next woman…

Remember: Most misogyny is broken by such a guy having the luck of meeting either a male mentor or a woman who re-educates him for the benefit of all socieity.

If we were to call shit like this, gender terrorism, than saying The Game can save lives would be just live saying that the Taliban won’t kill Americans if we all do everything they say. WHY? There are other ways.

Before we ask, whether sacrificing a woman could save other women from the rage which would be vented solely on teh sacrificed woman, plus children they have, why not ask;
- how about we try preventing these assholes from becoming assholes to begin with?
- how about we put these assholes down before they can harm?

I find shooting these assholes down a much more human solution than giving him a private woman to torture.

From events like this, and from ongoing experiences IRL, I think we should set a higher bar in taking down and rebuking revenge fantasy peddlers, full stop.

But Lauren, they are VERY HURT and in A LOT OF PAIN from BLUE BALLS and PUSSY DEPRIVATION and besides, WOMEN ARE SUPPOSED TO BE NURTURING. Not that any of that nurturing womanliness should stop any very hurt and in a lot of pain guys from shooting the bitches, though. I wouldn’t want to impinge on a dude’s right to feel his feelings!

No, I don’t want to do that at all. I would just like dudes to reconsider acting on those feelings in ways that leave women maimed/raped/killed by ‘em. WOW THAT IS LIKE SO RADICAL.

Apparently their youtube account that posted their video manifestos on how it’s the fault of the entire female gender that they get rejected, can’t get a girlfriend, have no friends and have to die alone.

Of course they do. Full up on the toxic, though, so I’m gonna have to miss that special little detour to the corner of Sick and Wrong.

@redredrobin: Obvious troll is obvious. Lemme know when some fella feels inspired to write “Ten Things Men Can Do To Combat Misogyny,” or actually even five things, or three, or ONE, and you can drop that link over at whenhellfreezesoverorthesungoessupernovawhichever.com. Thanks!

Women go through what he and other men go through, but I have yet to see a woman massacre men because she can’t find a boyfriend or get laid. It must be nice to be so entitled. FFS.

THIS kind of shit–the entitlement of men who brutalize women and the uninformed inbreeds who defend this shit–makes me want to check out of the human race. It makes me think that I should avoid having much at all to do with men. Because while men complain bitterly about ego-bruising rejection (like the bitches never have to deal with that, amirite), women are often brutalized by some entitled asshate. (And seriously, BP? He didn’t punish the men he supposedly blamed–he punished WOMEN. He killed WOMEN.)

Women are not property. Women are not things that you have a right to. And if you’re feeling rejected, oh PUA douchebag, keep in mind that there are women who feel just as rejected. The difference is, we aren’t raised with the idea that we are entitled to take what we want or kill men when we don’t get a pony. Here’s another ticket to the cluetrain–no matter how hot the woman, she’s likely encountered her share of negs and rejection. And if you weren’t so fucking entitled, you wouldn’t feel like you had a right to hot women (and unless Brad Pitt is staring back at you out of the mirror, you’d better STFU–live by that standard, die by it cupcake). You fucking shitstains have tried that tired old shtick on me, and honey, let me tell you, it’s tiresome. It’s a turnoff. And I do tend to want to stuff a ball gag in your mouths when you come up to me (and tell you to take off your stupid fucking hat or cape or whatever the fuck you’re using to jackrabbit). Get the fuck off the planet.

PS–Sodhini and other douchebags like this only want hot young women. Maybe if they broadened their search and actually looked beyond someone’s hotness, and dropped the entitled misogyny, they’d find someone.

Apparently their youtube account that posted their video manifestos on how it’s the fault of the entire female gender that they get rejected, can’t get a girlfriend, have no friends and have to die alone.

On the message board that they shut down last week (see link below), they say the youtube account was cancelled because of “too much truthtelling”. The cached links to their videos show extended hateful rants against women taped from their moms’ basements.

I had no idea that this brand of crazy (I-can’t-get-a-date-so-you-must-be-punished) actually had a club with baseball caps and podcasts.

Too. Weird. And. Tragic.

http://members.boardhost.com/trueforcedloneliness/index.html?1249683919#t_1247173299

And Wow @ the Female Market Value Test. I especially enjoyed the small penis question: someone is super telling on himself!