Before starting my guest-blogging stint here, I asked folks everywhere to send me ideas for things to post. Abby Jean requested ponies, which quickly turned into My Little Pony thanks to Cara. Queen Emily and T. R Xands expressed their excitement as well, so who am I to deny them? I am a believer in democracy, and the people have clearly spoken, so let’s take a trip down memory lane and enjoy the awesomeness that is My Little Pony Tales.
It took me a while to hunt it down, but I finally found the theme song to the version I watched growing up. True sadness that embedding is disabled on that one, but you can enjoy this clip instead from “Roll Around the Clock.” I was going to put up the video and call it a day, but it just so happens that the first clip I found has a great rap about attracting the opposite sex (lyrics below).
Boys:
Want the girls at your feet?
Don’t be friendly or sweet
Lesson number one – listen to me, son
Here’s the way it’s done
Don’t act shy and nervous like a fool
You have to play a part
Play cool!Girls:
Want to catch the boy’s eye?
Bake a chocolate cream pie
Let him know you like riding on a bike
Going for a hike
SachetSashay down the halls when you’re at school
You have to play it smart
Play cool!Boys:
When a girl is there, act like you don’t careGirls:
Play it meek and coy
That’s how the way to win the boyBoys:
Don’t be left on the shelf
Learn to package yourselfGirls:
It’s a common fact – putting on an act
Helps you to attract
When in doubt, recall this golden rule
You want to win his heart?Boys:
You want to win her heart?All:
Play cool!
Of course, when the girl and boy ponies try to hook up with each other by playing their part, it fails. She doesn’t like that he acts like a jerk, and he’s surprised at how ditzy she is. All of this teaches the kiddies that they have to be themselves, but the song sure is entertaining. Now let me go bake this chocolate cream pie for tonight — I hope it doesn’t burn while I’m out biking and hiking…
It’s so weird to see up-dated versions of the cartoons I watched as a child. Here’s the theme I remember.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QP_rIAkb_v8
They get less pony-like all the time! Wasn’t there a post around here a while back about the sexing up of my little ponies?
PONIES!!!!!!!!!!!!111!!!!! OMG! best ever! delight!!
Dude, I had dozens of these things . . .
I still have mine. After 18yrs it still lights up & makes noises.
I only had a couple but I have no idea where they are. I’m about 90% sure that my mother still has them in the basement somewhere. All I need to do is look hard enough…
Well, there goes my theory (based on the MLP movie and first TV show) that the Ponies lived in a lesbian commune and reproduced parthenogenically, like some lizards…
I mean, all the male characters in the first TV show and movies were non-pony species. And there were plenty of baby ponies around.
Anyone remember the first TV special with Megan? I loved the part where this twelve year old girl charges up to Scorpan (while he’s still on his giant flying Striadon monster), swings both fists at him and drives him off. That’s right – she takes on a gargoyle sitting on a fucking dragon with her BARE HANDS and continues to chase him while he retreats.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b6cXAUjqaRM&feature=PlayList&p=40D9387C1F44A8D7&index=4
I think that was a little feminists awakening moment for me: I can be brave enough to fight monsters bare handed. Of course this meant my badass ponies ran an extortion racket against the rest of the toy box. Even Jaba the Hutt paid up if he didn’t want to feel the iron hooves of Dream Castle’s crew.
Awwww.
At least there’s been some progress and the song –the voice of peer pressure– turns out to be wrong. I’m comforted to know a generation of kids, (or was that mostly girls?), who were My Little Ponies enthusiasts and got the message. Do boys play with My Little Ponies?
Oh jeez, sorry, sorry sorry, but my anal tendencies will NOT let this go: it’s “sashay,” not “sachet.”
the Ponies lived in a lesbian commune and reproduced parthenogenically, like some lizards…
Wednesday. I love you. There’s nothing more to say.
And Crys T, thanks for the catch, I’ll change it cuz now it’s going to bug me too. =)
“I still have mine. After 18yrs it still lights up & makes noises.”
And here I thought my Jurassic Park Command Compound was amazing for the computer still working 15 years after I got it…
Poniiiiiiiiiiiiiess
[...] Play Cool, Kids, Play Cool – Feministe An awesome post by @frausallybenz that combines girls, boys, My Little Pony, The Male Gaze, AND The Rules. Â Well done. [...]
http://icanhascheezburger.com/2009/08/13/funny-pictures-get-em-boyz/