The Hottest Heads of State

A few thoughts:

1. Sorry, Belarus, but you don’t deserve to be that high up on the list. I’d say same goes for Putin, but he’s wearing that awesome tank-top, so, even.
2. Xanana Gusmao, where have you been all my life?
3. Mohammed VI was robbed.

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35 comments for “The Hottest Heads of State

  1. Morningstar
    October 13, 2009 at 2:57 pm

    putin deserves #1 place for that tank top and his many shirtless pics.

    argentina’s should be right after putin.

  2. P.T. Smith
    October 13, 2009 at 3:04 pm

    When did Putin act in a staging of “A Streetcar Named Desire”?

  3. October 13, 2009 at 3:15 pm

    Mention Putin on a blog, check your coffee with a Geiger counter. Just sayin’.

  4. Alex
    October 13, 2009 at 3:43 pm

    The guy at #50 wins Honorable Mention For Most Awesome Hat. His title’s pretty fun, too.

  5. Katie
    October 13, 2009 at 3:53 pm

    Hate to be that guy, but there are SO many options for words for an undershirt besides “wifebeater.”

    Here are some:

    – undershirt
    – tank top
    – A-shirt
    – muscle shirt
    – singlet

    See? Options!

  6. Sara
    October 13, 2009 at 3:56 pm

    Seconding Katie’s comment. It’s especially jarring to read on a feminist blog.

  7. October 13, 2009 at 4:03 pm

    Fair enough, Katie and Sara. Changed.

  8. Splinch
    October 13, 2009 at 4:09 pm

    Fascinating how many women are in the top 12. Rather disproportionate to the number of female heads of state, no?

    Who would have guessed that women have to be much better looking to get ahead in politics?

  9. Jha
    October 13, 2009 at 4:13 pm

    Huh. YDPA Mizan is the head of state as much as Queen Elizabeth is.

    And you’re right! Where IS Mohammed VI?!

  10. Natalie L.
    October 13, 2009 at 4:24 pm

    Ha! My cousin’s mother-in-law is on the list.

  11. Suzanne M
    October 13, 2009 at 4:31 pm

    I had no idea how many dead sexy heads of state/government there were. I’d like to offer a quick shout-out to Dmitri Medvedev who, for obvious reasons, isn’t on the list, while Putin is. Mitya, dear, you’re pretty sexy for a puppet.

    Joseph Kabila reminds me a little of Omar Epps. It might just be the expression on his face, but I think it’s the cheekbones. That’s not a bad thing.

    I think the mustache cost Isaias Afewerki a higher position. Though that doesn’t explain Alexander Lukashenko, because damn. You, sir, are no #12. Sorry.

    Also, seconded on Xanana Gusmao.

    And finally, I look forward to the release of the King of Bhutan’s first album. I think it’ll be light jazz. I’m very tempted to knock out a quick cover mock-up in MS Paint, but I’d have to track down a bigger copy of the photo first.

  12. Kyra
    October 13, 2009 at 5:14 pm

    Something’s striking me as hilarious about the fact that the celibate Pope Benedict is second-to-last on the “hottest” list, and I’m not sure if it’s that he’s way way way at the bottom, or that somebody ranked below him.

  13. Crys T
    October 13, 2009 at 5:44 pm

    This is kind of old news, but all of you Vladamir fans, there’s his judo video:

    And of course, PHWWWOOOOAAAARRRRR!:

  14. Lizzie
    October 13, 2009 at 6:44 pm

    Splinch – no it’s just that women are mostly more attractive than men so any women who DO get to the top in politics are more likely to be hot.

    Curious to note the bottom is full of bloodthirsty despots while the very top is dominated by royalty or democratically elected leaders.

    Does this mean:
    1. People are shallow and given the chance, only vote for hotties
    2. Royals tend to get hot spouses so even if the dynastic founder is ugly, within a few generations they will become hot
    3. Ugly people become bitter hence more likely to turn into mass-murdering dictators
    4. Being a mass-murdering dictator makes you become ugly, because foaming-mouthed self-righteous insanity is bad for your skin (eg Congo’s sexy Joseph Kabila was a rebel who could have gone the bloody dictator route, but on the whole didn’t, and hence remains hot)
    5. It’s hard to be taken seriously as a dictator if you are too good-looking so the hot ones never make it
    6. All of the above


    Also if a despot WERE to be sexy, should we call them a sexpot?

  15. Morningstar
    October 13, 2009 at 7:18 pm

    i dunno lizzie, i think castro’s got some sex appeal. only reason why he’s not on that list is because he’s no longer head of state. :(

  16. FashionablyEvil
    October 13, 2009 at 7:24 pm

    Joseph Kabila reminds me a little of Omar Epps.

    Or Mike Tomlin (the Steelers coach).

  17. Tlönista
    October 13, 2009 at 7:40 pm

    AAAAUGH WTF is Stephen Harper doing on that list?

    Thirding Xanana Gusmao, and also, Michelle Bachelet should be higher up.

  18. Meg
    October 13, 2009 at 8:12 pm

    Harper needs to be moved at least 20 spots down. (Well, technically he needs to be moved *off* the list, if we’re being picky, since he’s not actually our head of state but whatever.) He looks OK in that photo, in a Pilsbury-doughboy-with-bad-hair kind of way, but he looks way creepy most of the time. He has a habit of posing with kittens; I think he’s trying to make himself look less evil, but the kittens always look terrified. And then there’s this.

    Lee Hsien Loong’s lookin’ pretty good. :3

  19. Lizzie
    October 13, 2009 at 8:30 pm

    Morningstar – not sure I agree with you but hey, maybe if you are an anti-American hero of the communists you get sexy points, even if you also moonlight as a raving psycho.

    Just a point, Sarkozy of France is 5’3 and Ahmadinejad of Iran is 5’4. I say they need to lose serious points for this. I know it’s shallow but then, so is this list.

    I wonder what would happen if you plotted their hotness against their left/right or authoritarian/libertarian tendencies, GDP, approval ratings, etc. Are there any correlations? Are hot or ugly leaders better, or more popular, or more or less controlling? And since this is Feministe, do women’s rights progress more under a attractive leader or an ugly one?

  20. Dominique
    October 13, 2009 at 8:35 pm

    This is just… wrong….

  21. October 13, 2009 at 8:54 pm

    Not the most flattering photo of Ms. Tymoshenko. It doesn’t have her gorgeous hairstyle!

    (also, Sarkozy? D:)

  22. October 14, 2009 at 12:08 am

    Overlooking the fact that I CAN’T BELIEVETHIS EXISTS (!?!?!)… how is no one outraged that Obama is 14? Do we not remember his shirtless photos in Hawaii?

  23. Ginjoint
    October 14, 2009 at 6:34 am

    He’s number 15, Eghead, but I’m with you. I think he should’ve been in the top three. I mean, behind Lukashenko from Belarus?!

  24. Crys T
    October 14, 2009 at 7:15 am

    “Royals tend to get hot spouses so even if the dynastic founder is ugly, within a few generations they will become hot”

    I can’t agree with this: royals don’t usually marry for love/lust, they marry for strategic purposes (look at what happened to the British royal family 10 years ago: all of that could’ve been avoided if they’d married for personal reasons in the first place). And just take a look at the royal families around the globe. You may find the occasional conventionally attractive person, but in general……

    Royals have affairs. etc when they want sex from someone who’s hot.

  25. MaryC
    October 14, 2009 at 8:01 am

    Thank you for my morning giggle. I think my favorite photo might have been Saakashvili, because, you know how boy bands always have one member who’s supposed to be “the tough one”? Saakashvili is totally making that face.

    Also, I never knew how much of a “brooding Liam Neeson” thing the Prime Minister of Norway had going on.

  26. October 14, 2009 at 8:10 am

    Politics aside, Netanyahu in the top 50? Really? He looks like me, for goodness sake! Certainly he should be below Balkendief.

    (Also, I thought the Finnish PM was a woman. This is because like most Americans I don’t pay attention to foreign news on the news.)

  27. Morningstar
    October 14, 2009 at 9:23 am

    lizzie, i’m really not going to satisfied until you agree that this right here is a great look:

    and this!

    cmon! this guy had tons of style.

  28. Medea
    October 14, 2009 at 10:51 am

    Sarkozy should not be above Evo Morales.

  29. stompie
    October 14, 2009 at 12:16 pm

    Wait, the EMPEROR scored higher than Aso Taro? Clearly no-one saw those photos from his sharpshooting days:

  30. lemur
    October 14, 2009 at 1:08 pm

    Jens Stoltenburg….yum. Borhut Pahor has gorgeous eyes.

  31. October 14, 2009 at 6:36 pm

    I’m freezing and depressed in Ukraine right now – and the fact that the PM is hot is totally not cheering me up at the moment. What’s interesting is that all of her campaign ads right now don’t feature her at all. They do feature celebrities and this really nice cherry-red colour. And hearts. Say what you want about Tymoshenko, but she is unabashedly feminine, and I kind of dig that.

    Putin is good-looking, I think. There’s just something about him. He can work it. And he knows it.

  32. October 15, 2009 at 2:26 am

    Stephenson King should be way higher.

  33. zoetheshort
    October 15, 2009 at 10:32 am

    The king of Bhutan is downright dreamy.

  34. October 15, 2009 at 11:03 am

    Any ‘good’ list that has Daniel Ortega on it has absolutely NO legitimacy whatsoever.

    Instead of being on the Hottest Heads of State list. Daniel Ortega should be on the World’s Worst Dictators list.

  35. Ledasmom
    October 15, 2009 at 4:25 pm

    The king of Thailand’s hat is kinda scary.

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