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Would you douche with this Douche?
“Douching can cause harm because it disrupts the balance of the Vagina’s natural organisms. It can lead to infection and may also cause an infection to spread to the reproductive tract.”
Ass douche. Its the new rage.
The new HannityDouche was recently removed from the market when many users discovered it caused a rare syndrome caused “vaginal dentata” to erupt when the device was placed into position for use.
Conservatives and douching….. bad for women’s health.
One of these things is irritating, unnecessary and potentially dangerous. The other is a douche. Your call.
“A recent corporate integrity agreement requires that the company in question disclose that women cannot, in fact, use Sean Hannity as a douche. Confusion to the contrary has resulted in a class-action lawsuit.”
None of these things belong anywhere near a vagina.
After re-organizing their shelves, a local store reports a 200 percent increase in sales of Hannity’s book. “It’s strange, when the book was with the other books, somehow nobody noticed it. Apparently the people who are out to buy a douche will do just that,” the store manager commented.
I’m gonna buck the trend and say that by itself, it needs nothing more than:
“Everything in its place”
I’m going to use Summer’s Eve this time, that Sean Hannity crap left a slimy feeling…
“conveniently, they also sell just the nozzles.”
Sales of Summer’s Eve have risen dramatically lately, due to consumer complaints regarding Sean Hannity Conservative Victory brand douches. The resounding consensus of the consumer is that the ‘not-so-fresh’ feeling worsened into a dirty, disgusting mess.
“For victory over that not-so-fresh ‘hope-and-change’ scent, try Sean Hannity Discount Douche.”
Why do we need to caption this? Is there something out of the ordinary going on here?
“At least he got a face-out”
(For those not in the book-selling profession, a face-out is when you turn a book so that the full cover is visible from the shelf, instead of just its spine. There’s a lot of competition for shelf space in book stores-we only face out books we particularly want people to notice or pick up. Hannity should be grateful for the extra exposure.)
Sean Hannity’s new book “Conservative Victory,” available wherever you find douches.