LGBT community to the state of Minnesota: “YOU’RE WELCOME.”

[Update: Okay, so I’m a sucker. It’s satire. Wishful thinking on my part, I suppose.]

Well, you’ve done it now, Minnesota. You’ve gone and okayed same-sex marriage, and now Michele Bachmann is leaving.

Congresswoman Michele Bachman threatened to leave Minnesota today if the state goes ahead with its plans to legalize gay marriage.

In an interview with a local television station, the conservative firebrand said she believes God will destroy Minneapolis once the legislation is enacted, and wants to be far away when the reckoning happens.

No, don’t go, Michele. Really. Minnesota is begging you. Stay. Well, darn, there she goes.

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29 comments for “LGBT community to the state of Minnesota: “YOU’RE WELCOME.”

  1. mkdc
    May 13, 2013 at 10:52 pm

    Daily Currant is satire, no? How I wish it were true…

    • May 13, 2013 at 11:14 pm


  2. DTGinSTL
    May 13, 2013 at 10:59 pm

    Daily Currant is unfortunately a satirical site, but oh how I wish that story were true.

  3. EG
    May 13, 2013 at 11:17 pm

    “God will destroy Minneapolis” just doesn’t pack a lot of threatening oomph as a threat.

    Anyway, isn’t God busy, what with Argentina, Belgium, Canada, the Netherlands, Denmark, Iceland, Norway, Portugal, Spain, South Africa and Sweden to destroy, to say nothing of DC, Connecticut, Iowa, Massachusetts, New Hampshire, New York, Vermont, Maine, Maryland, Washington, Delaware, and Rhode Island, even if God isn’t feeling like going abroad? What makes Bachman think Minneapolis is so special as to merit particular attention?

    • EG
      May 13, 2013 at 11:20 pm

      Damn. That’s the problem with right-wingers today. All the satire seems perfectly plausible.

      • Kerandria
        May 13, 2013 at 11:53 pm

        Seriously. Sometimes I think that Faux News takes its cues from the Onion..

      • foxy
        May 14, 2013 at 3:55 am

        Even the radical right doesnt take bachmann seriously.Remember her performance in primaries.

    • Willard
      May 14, 2013 at 12:42 am

      That’s just like God too to go after a city next to the one where the voting is going on. Poor Minneapolis just minding its business while crafty St Paul is at it again.

    • BabyRaptor
      May 14, 2013 at 1:08 am

      God has terrible aim. If Minnesota is his current target, I’ll start getting worried for all of us down here in Arkansas.

      • Marksman2000
        May 14, 2013 at 10:24 pm

        I don’t believe it. Could it be another Feministe member in Arkansas?

      • BabyRaptor
        May 15, 2013 at 2:41 am

        Indeed! Moved here from Texas ~5 years ago.

      • Chataya
        May 15, 2013 at 10:08 am

        Another Arkansan here!

      • Marksman2000
        May 17, 2013 at 2:49 pm

        This is so cool.

        In a state as ultra- ultra- ultra- ultra- ultra-conservative as Arkansas, it feels good to see that there’s real hope after all.

    • Tim
      May 14, 2013 at 12:07 pm

      and Ecuador.

      • Tyris
        May 14, 2013 at 1:10 pm

        And Mars.

    • khw
      May 14, 2013 at 2:07 pm

      Now that Brazil has got in on the act too, there is some more territory to be well smitten!

    • Schmorgluck
      May 15, 2013 at 7:20 am

      And France, too.

  4. A4
    May 13, 2013 at 11:27 pm

    Poe’s Law in action!

  5. A
    May 14, 2013 at 3:11 am

    You’re certainly not the first to fall for a daily currant article…

  6. yes
    May 14, 2013 at 4:31 am

    On the up side, the recently retired pope has some rather uplifting things to say.

  7. Kaia
    May 14, 2013 at 9:23 am

    This is just depressing to read….

  8. JBL55
    May 14, 2013 at 10:53 am

    Yeah, between the earthquakes, volcanoes, flesh-eating diseases, and all that fire & brimstone raining down, life here in Maine has really gone down the tubes since our citizens referendum on marriage equality was passed.

  9. Tim
    May 14, 2013 at 12:09 pm

    I suppose she will be headed back to Waterloo. I hope she turns and looks back as she crosses the border — a Michele Bachman Pillar of Salt would be an awesome tourist attraction for northern Iowa.

  10. Marksman2000
    May 14, 2013 at 10:20 pm

    This is satire on steroids.

  11. Michelle
    May 14, 2013 at 10:33 pm

    This one got me too. I wrote a withering, epic response, dripping with contempt. And then I had to mumble a hasty “uh nevermind,” and sheepishly delete.

    …In our defense, one shouldn’t try to satirize Michele Bachmann. You just can’t exaggerate it to the point where the reader can recognize it as something she would not actually say. I could totally picture her actually giving this interview, and that makes it less funny and more scary.

    • Marksman2000
      May 15, 2013 at 3:20 am



    • Datdamwuf
      May 15, 2013 at 11:23 am

      I was duped for a moment too, she is so batshit crazy it was believable – but hey someone has to take over for Pat Robertson at some point, she is the perfect “candidate”.

  12. Marksman2000
    May 17, 2013 at 3:00 pm

    Did anyone catch the latest news on Pat Robertson’s comments to a caller about her husband’s adultery?

    Geez, are these people for real?

    Some great quotes:

    “Stop talking about the cheating. He cheated on you. Well, he’s a man. OK.” And “Males have a tendency to wander a little bit. And what you want to do is make a home so wonderful he doesn’t want to wander.”

    Where do these people come from? Wander a little bit? Yeah, right. I know some women who if they catch you “wandering,” they’ll put their foot so far up your ass you’ll need a Rand McNally Road Atlas to remove it.

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