Quick hit: This is not a thing that happens

Content note: rape and rape apologia

Bullshit. Bullshit, bullshit, bullshit. You don’t accidentally fall on somebody and penetrate their vagina with your penis. I can’t believe this defense flew, and after only 30 fucking minutes of deliberations. Who thinks this? Who thinks “Gee, it is totes reasonable to think that he tripped and fell on her and his semen was only inside her because of a previous sexual encounter and she’s lying when she says she woke up to find him forcing himself on her, because ladies are just batshit like that, she’s probably doing this for funsies”?

Some days you wake up and read the news and realize exactly how much misogyny is operating in this world, and it’s too early to have a drink. I’m going to go make tea now.

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14 comments for “Quick hit: This is not a thing that happens

  1. December 16, 2015 at 12:11 pm

    I thought that whole “tripping and falling into someone’s vagina”, that was only a thing people people said as a sarcastic comeback to the claim of “It just happened!”

    I didn’t think it could be used as an actual rape defense. How horrifying.

  2. Orlando
    December 16, 2015 at 3:53 pm

    I suspect the jury didn’t even pretend to believe it, but rather thought that a girl who falls asleep on a strange man’s sofa after drinking only got what she should have expected. A lot of rape trial acquittals seem to happen not because there was any doubt about what happened, but rather because the jury decides the victim is not the kind of woman who deserves redress.

    • December 16, 2015 at 7:28 pm

      Well said. It’s horrible that such a thing needs to be said, but at least you cut through the crap about it.

      Small comfort, I know.

  3. pheenobarbidoll
    December 16, 2015 at 4:40 pm

    Right then. My defense will be ” he ran into my knife. He ran into my knife 10 times”.

    • PrettyAmiable
      December 16, 2015 at 5:26 pm

      +1! Favorite line from the play.

    • December 16, 2015 at 7:27 pm

      Yay Chicago!!

  4. HowIsBabbyFormed
    December 16, 2015 at 5:17 pm

    I don’t see this as evidence of stupid people, just immoral people who think women deserve to be raped.

  5. Angie unduplicated
    December 17, 2015 at 11:51 am

    Haven’t seen anything this dumbass since the F-state murder trial where the guy pleaded insanity because he ate a twinkie and it messed with his cognition.

    Hand the guy a sword and tell him to fall on it. Historical precedent favors it.

  6. Ashley
    December 18, 2015 at 12:58 am

    I just love how all of the sudden I’m, looked upon by the city and its resources, as a second class citizen. My education means nothing, my son cannot stay where i can afford to live because i cannot work, and the rapist goes off and hasnt been arrested yet. he can be a drug dealer live free…. I don’t understand what is wrong w our country of life liberty and the freedom of happiness.

  7. Actual
    December 24, 2015 at 3:32 pm

    The linked article is less than 400 words. How is it that no one, EG included, actually read it?

    There’s shady stuff in this trial (including the judge allowing evidence to be heard in private), and I don’t doubt his status as a Saudi millionaire helped, but not overtly lying is important, even on a dying blog. He didn’t say he fell and his penis slipped into her. He said “she had pulled him on top of her and placed his hand between her legs” and that “it was possible he had semen on his hands after the sexual encounter with her friend.” That’s a very different (quite possibly still bullshit) claim, and the fact that it is slightly harder to mock or stir up outrage for doesn’t change the fact that it’s what was said.

    tl;dr- Scott Adams’ long-forgotten and hilariously dumb “READING COMPREHENSION!” visit to feministe was just premature.

    • EG
      December 26, 2015 at 10:50 am

      Oh reading expert, let me draw your attention to the first sentence of the linked article:

      A Saudi millionaire has been cleared of raping a teenager after claiming he might have accidentally penetrated the 18-year-old when he tripped and fell on her.

      [emphasis added]

      I suppose I should expect no less of Scott Adams fan than that they would fail to take into account what the woman said happened:

      The teenager claimed she woke in the early hours with Abdulaziz on top of her forcing himself inside her.

      Put what he said, that he slipped when she pulled him and fell on her, with what she said, that he was forcing himself inside her, and what do you get? I’ll wait.

      That said, I treasure this comment for the image it gives me of a Scott Adams fan hunched over his or her computer on Christmas Eve, searching feminist sites for an excuse to troll. I’m Jewish, and I’ve never been that bored and at a loss on Christmas Eve. In the spirit of the season, I’m glad we could be here for you. And in my more usual spirit, I’m tickled to death by the absurd pathos of you.

  8. Actual
    January 1, 2016 at 3:51 pm

    Not a Scott Adams fan, a participant in Christmas as either a religious or cultural tradition, or particularly passionate about this. I understand your desire to paint me as all three, though. Some people just take free time to catch up on blogs they don’t read particularly frequently. Next time you can probably save time by calling your critics “losers with no lives.” It serves the same function, but takes less time and is a bit less ethnocentric. :)

    You can penetrate a vagina with lots of things. A finger, for example, which he clarifies later in the article. Which makes slightly more sense (in that it’s a wildly dubious claim rather than a comically absurd one). I know you want to “win,” but take a moment to honestly reread the article and see if you can spot and admit to your oopsie.

    • Pheenobarbidoll
      January 2, 2016 at 12:40 am

      How about this – it doesn’t fucking matter if it was his penis or his finger. He didn’t accidentally do one goddamn thing, he intentionally did it and still got away with it. Which is the more important fucking point. He got away with rape by claiming it was an oopsie. But no, let’s all pause a moment to deal with the really important matter of your opinion on eg thinking it was a penis.

      Jesus christ.

  9. Axauv
    January 11, 2016 at 3:19 pm

    You realize this is a Saudi millionaire we’re talking about. You can’t claim the system is so backward misogynist that such a ridiculous defense is symptomatic of lots of rape cases. In fact the words “Saudi millionaire” are the two most important in this case. Of course the guy’s full of shit, but if he had been poor white bloke that defense would never have worked. Remember Rochdale? Institutionalized political correctness has a tranquilizing effect on the law in most western countries.

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