When Feminists Face Abuse
“I want to make you happy”. That’s what he used to tell me sometimes after another rage fit of his. And for almost two years I believed that. I believed that even after he slapped me for the first time, taking a swing at my upper arm. I stopped believing it after the second slap, the one that landed on my back (luckily, not with full force).
...read moreNo, Chops & Hops, domestic violence is still not funny.
Belvedere vodka has some competition for Most Tasteless Marketing of a Consumer Product (Facebook Edition). Atlanta-area restaurant Chops & Hops has put in its bid with their newest celebrity-themed burger: Rihanna’s “Caribbean Black & Bleu” sandwich.
...read moreFebruary is Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month
And with all the coverage of Rihanna / Chris Brown (which I will write about later, but ugh, can we please stop blaming her for “being a bad role model” or whatever and maybe put the responsibility for beating another human being on the person who did the beating?), it’s a pertinent conversation. The stats are disturbing:
...read moreWhy We Need V-Day More Than Ever
“Why are you doing Vagina Monologues?”
...read moreThe Shit List
So a commenter in the Chris Brown thread just pointed out that Janet Jackson was apparently banned from the Grammys a few years ago because of her nip slip at the Super Bowl. Two which my response is twofold: (1) What the holy fuck; and (2) Aren’t you SO GLAD that the term “nip slip” has left the general lexicon? Me too.
...read moreChris Brown won’t let us forget: Domestic violence is okay if you’re hot
Trigger warning for domestic violence
Sasha Pasulka of HelloGiggles said it best: “I’m not okay with Chris Brown performing at the Grammys and I’m not sure why you are.” She points out that the popular response to Chris Brown’s beating of Rihanna was beyond disappointing, with fans and celebrities alike falling back on “No one knows exactly what happened” and “It takes two to tango” and “He’s such a great guy; he never would have done something like that unprovoked.” Jump forward three years, he was invited to perform at the Grammys (because the music industry appears to be okay with it). Because, says Grammys producer Ken Erlich, people deserve a second chance. And he hasn’t performed at the Grammys for two whole years now. And “we were the victim of what happened.”
But that was last night. That was Hollywood’s reaction. This morning, it’s the fans’ reaction, which appears to be: Chris Brown is so hot, it would be okay if he beat me.
It would be awesome if he beat me.
Examples hidden behind the jump, because seriously, triggering. I just can’t.
...read moreSome Transformative Justice Links
In the wake of recent conversations, I’ve been looking around for further resources on transformative justice. I haven’t been able to do a lot of intense follow-up on the topic lately, because in mid-January I had major spinal surgery (after breaking my neck in an accident back in 2011); this obviously has involved many painkillers and a lot of sleep and not-working as much as possible. However, I have been able to do some reading, and I want to share some of what I’ve found most compelling.
...read moreThe best thing you will read today about Breaking Dawn
And vampire-fetus-babies and misogyny and female desire and abuse and rough sex and mother-martyrs:
...read moreWelcome to the twisted glory that is Mormon housewife turned teen-lit sensation Stephenie Meyer’s imagination.
On the pages of Breaking Dawn Meyer let that imagination, which has been hovering under the repressed surface of the series’ previous three books, run rampant: Bedboard-breaking, feather-spilling, bruising honeymoon sex. A demonic pregnancy that grows so fast the fetus is nudging and jumping around the heroine’s womb days after conception. A grown-up werewolf falling in love with a half-vampire infant. And our heavily-pregnant heroine sipping blood from a soda cup–and loving it–just before her ribs and spine are shattered by the immortal spawn she’s carrying. It gets better: a c-section performed by vampire teeth. A shot of venom straight to the heart. A crazed childless vampire woman who will protect the fetus at all costs.
On Change and Accountability: A Response to Clarisse Thorn
This is a guest post by Maia.
Dear Clarisse
Towards the end of your post On Change and Accountability you asked a question.
Did you expect your readers to answer no?
...read moreWhite Ribbon Day
I missed posting about White Ribbon Day yesterday. Fortunately, I realised that most of you are in the USA or other countries in similar timezones, so I can post about it today and it will still be kinda relevant! White Ribbon Day is Australia’s Day to End Violence Against Women. Yes, it’s extremely gendered and [...]
...read more“One Abuse Script with Many Faces”
We’ve been discussing gaslighting as an abuse tactic in two previous posts in response to this article by Yashar Ali who reassures us that we ladies are not crazy (thanks). In the first, Caperton dissects Ali’s message directly and the problems with male allies presenting problems analyzed by feminists as new and novel issues. In [...]
...read more
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