Great Harvest

Biggest Harvest Yet

Posted in Domesticity | 2 Comments

The End of the Hair Experiment

My father has taken to calling me Cruella Deville.

This is, perhaps, the only nickname I’ve ever gotten that could stick. For awhile, several of my friends took to calling me Loretta after the Nick Cave song “The Curse of Millhaven,” and if you know the song this could clue you in to my bad temper.

But my nieces and nephews seem to really like this nickname and I have caught them calling me Cruella behind my back this week. It might have something to do with me not being cool with watching them bowl over my mother’s rules. Grandma may be outnumbered, but Aunt Lauren is mean. And boy, can I be mean. Somewhere along the way I have developed a threatening voice and an evil eye that I can put on with a moment’s notice. I reserve this demeanor for all interactions with other people’s small children.

But the worst part about my father’s new nickname for me is that it is visually apt. When I went from this blond to this brown, I hesitated for a bit wondering if my hair was truly naturally blond.

But judging from the thin skunk stripe running down my head, very blond roots on dark hair, I think I can draw a decent conclusion. It looks like I’ll be going to the salon soon.

Posted in Vanity | Tagged | 10 Comments

Why I Can Knit But Not Learn Math

And it isn’t because I am female.

Posted in Education | 11 Comments

Tuesday Time Waster

A Super Mario Brothers opera of sorts.

Posted in Entertainment | 4 Comments

SCOTUS Nomination Must-Reads

Click through for your Lauren-endorsed reads of the day.
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Posted in Politics, Recommended | Tagged | 4 Comments

That’s Just Great

Wonderful. Just great.

I agree to watching six children this afternoon — ages 13, 12, 11, 10, 5, and 9 months — and I don’t even get the option of screaming at them to get outside already, and shut that door! You lettin’ the flies in! You raised in a barn?!

I may actually have to entertain six kids all by my lonesome?

Someone bring mama some aspirin and tea. She’s having a spell.

UPDATE: I would just like to say that, other than the sweetest baby in the world, I am tired of watching other people’s children. Nannies, my hat off to you.

Posted in Domesticity | Tagged , | 15 Comments

Oh My

Like she says, I have no idea how this headline got past an editor.

Posted in Celebrity | Tagged , | 9 Comments

Tattoos for Jesus

I know a few people who have quite literally gotten tattoos for Jesus, but this?

The tattoo is as old as Cain. In Jesus’ time, condemned criminals were tattooed. Tattoos have marked those set apart or condemned as recently as World War II when our Jewish brethren perished.

In the last few centuries tattoos have become more of an art form dedicated to some person or ideal.

“Mom” was the most famous tattoo in history. It seems obvious that if Jesus were to shock the status quo in the 21st Century with a tattoo that it would say “Father”.

We should be quick to love and slow to judge, Anxious to forgive and repulsed by self-pity, Curious to understand and cautious to resent. There is no box in which we can place Jesus merely by his appearance. As we do good to others, let us not reserve our kindness only for those who look “safe” or “beautiful”. However alarmed we might be at another person’s appearance that is our problem. Tragically we too often make it the other person’s problem as well.

This, however, is even cooler.

I can think of a few people who would kill for this poster. Namely me.

via Chaos Theory

Posted in Religion | Tagged , | 31 Comments

Rosey Grier’s Needlepoint for Men

Emily sent me this link forever ago, and it’s such a cute slideshow that I can’t believe I haven’t posted it yet.

For those of you who don’t know, Rosey Grier was a professional football player for the Giants and the Rams. Bonus points for having Pam Grier as a cousin. He was apparently well-known at the time for his hobbies of needlepoint and macrame, obviously notable for their lack of the expected athletic machismo. I have nothing else to say about this except that Rosey Grier is my hero for the day.

Queer it up, Mary.

Posted in Domesticity, Gender | 16 Comments

Taking “parental consent” to a whole new level

Now if you’re under 18 in some states, you aren’t only blocked from controlling your own reproductive system, but from even deciding what your naughty bits look like. That’s right, Missouri teens might have to get written parental permission to get a Brazilian bikini wax.

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Posted in Feminism, Sex | Tagged , | 23 Comments

The Reduction of Iraqi Women’s Rights

Earlier this month, Jill wrote on the reduction of women’s rights in Iraq and generated a massive comment thread between those who believe that the only women we have to worry about are those who come from conservative families. Because all women will be controlled by their families. As someone who regularly blames the patriarchy*, this isn’t a particularly settling option.

NPR’s Morning Edition featured the largest Iraqi feminist group that is actively, dangerously working against the implementation of Shari’ah. This political position is enough to warrant death, but the spokeswoman for the group rightly contends that the threat of death is better than living as a “slave.” Do listen for more details on how the implementation of Shari’ah will affect women’s right from a more credible source than I.

In the meantime, Patricia at Whirled View notes how Americans are weakening women’s rights with the War on Terra:

[T]wo years after the people of Iraq were “liberated” from the dictator, women in Southern Iraq are being hounded by Shiite vice squads modeled after the religious sadists in post-revolution Iran and in Afghanistan under the Taliban. Even medically-indicated x-rays of females have become controversial!

More to be dreaded in the long run are efforts to deny women full equality under the constitution that is being written for a “free” and “democratic” Iraq. The crux for women is defining the role Islam is to be assigned in shaping legislation. Also critical is determining the extent to which women’s personal status will be governed by conservative interpretations of Muslim family law. We’re talking about marriage, divorce, child custody, inheritance here. We’re talking old fashioned, undiluted patriarchy masquerading as piety.

Patricia, an international affairs specialist, further explains why the bases of the new Constitution are particularly sticky. She details a precendence that was set during her initial entry into Foreign Service:
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Posted in Feminism, War | 5 Comments

Israel Will Outlaw Anorexic Models

Jacqui sent me a link to this article, of particular interest for her as she works (or worked?) with plus-size models in the industry.

The Guardian reports that Israel is in the process of ending the employment of fashion models with eating disorders:

This Sunday, a committee of the Israeli parliament, the Knesset, will decide whether to proceed with a bill to compel model agencies to monitor the health and body mass index (the ratio of height to weight) of models. Models would have to undergo regular medical tests to ensure their body mass index (BMI) is 19 or above. The most serious anorexics can have a BMI as low as seven.

If the Knesset passes the bill, [Israeli photographer] Barkan hopes the effect will be two-fold. First, agencies will be forced to confront a problem they have for long ignored and, second, only “healthy” models will be seen on television, in magazines and on billboards.

Barkan would only employ models with a certain BMI, saying that he employed only healthy models despite being able to hide the signs of eating disorders with good lighting and digital imaging software. Barkan also believes that the fashion industry has a huge part in furthering spectacles that lead to body image disorders, saying, “”I think 50% of the problem can be dealt with by us. If the fashion stores, food companies and other consumers of model services refuse to employ unhealthy women, that will remove one part of the motivation to reduce weight.”

This is one overseas reform I can get behind. First Benneton, then Dove, now Barkan. But unlike the Dove campaign, Barken seeks to remove the spectacle from the spectacle, a reform that will begin to reframe normalcy.

Posted in Feminism | 38 Comments